AramisMedici Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Hello! I am a new user to this forum and would like to start by saying thanks for letting me be here! I've been reading this for the last couple days or so, and thanks to the posts here, I've decided to create an account and write a post! The post's topic; I believe I'm demisexual, but I want to make sure by asking you all who read this for your opinions. I am a 17 year old female who has identified as straight for my whole life. But only as of recent I've been questioning whether this really is me or not. For all of my life, I've never been really attracted to anyone's looks. People would go on and on about movie stars, singers, my biology teacher, and would eventually turn to me and ask, "Do you think X person is hot?" My responce? "No." My reasoning would be, without any thought, "Because I don't know him!". Followed by a healthy dosing of chastisement from my peers about being nuts for not being attracted to X person, the qualities of X person, and utter confoundment that someone could not be attracted to X person. To me, attraction to strangers is strange and unwarranted, and I could not (and still cannot) understand why people would form an attraction to someone they never met. To everyone around me, I start to appreciate and even start to feel attraction, sexually and emotionally, to the people who I've known for at least a year or so. It's not their looks that I start to notice or their body, but their personality, intelligence and character. Not to say I can't appreciate such things, but I hardly glance or consider their appearance as a huge factor. So am I right in thinking I'm in the grey area? I'd appreciate some opinions, and once again, thank you all and hello! ^_^ Link to post Share on other sites
Altair Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Please keep in mind I just joined this site, just realized I might be asexual last night, and am not the smartest, but I will give it a shot. (Oh and I'm also still trying to even figure out what the "gray area" means) I wonder if your situation is more of an emotional preference. You say you can feel some attraction to people who you've known for a while, just not people you do not know. I'm similar, where it's harder for me to be attracted to someone I just met and I do not find very many celebrities even moderately attractive. I guess I am different in that I do get attracted to looks, but only emotionally not sexually. Have you ever been in a relationship? Or at least tried to be intimate with a friend? If so how did that feel? If not, what about a crush on anybody? You might not be completely asexual, so if this is "grey area" then that might be what you fall under. But in truth, there's no way to break any of this down into black and white. Sexuality is far too complex. Ah...I'm sorry this wasn't any help :( :\ but hopefully after...attempting to break it down a bit someone else will be able to help you. Link to post Share on other sites
The Pofessional Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 I think I'll leave this to someone a bit more experienced with demi and grey-A, but for now: WELCOME And hey, I'm 18 and I just got out of the awkward "questioning" phase. If you ever need a peer to talk to, just send me a PM :^) Cheers! Link to post Share on other sites
AramisMedici Posted January 8, 2012 Author Share Posted January 8, 2012 I guess I am different in that I do get attracted to looks, but only emotionally not sexually. Have you ever been in a relationship? Or at least tried to be intimate with a friend? If so how did that feel? If not, what about a crush on anybody? You might not be completely asexual, so if this is "grey area" then that might be what you fall under. But in truth, there's no way to break any of this down into black and white. Sexuality is far too complex. No no, every bit helps! I should probably touch on some of the stuff you asked anyway. I haven't been in a relationship before, but I do have a crush on a guy I've known for about two years or so. But that's it, that's really the only crush I've ever had. And thanks Po Et! ^_^ Link to post Share on other sites
FenrisWolf Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Hello and welcome! I'm afraid the lame answer you're probably going to get from a lot of people is that we can't tell you, it's something that time and experience will reveal to you for itself. Wo0o0o, mysterious... :P But yeah. If you feel identifying as asexual is something that works for you for now, do that. If you don't, it's fine that you're still figuring it out and we're still always here if you want to discuss stuff that happens or browse or whatever to help. I'm sorry for my own unhelpful answer by the way, I was trying to figure out what gray-a means myself, haha! Link to post Share on other sites
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