Feo Takahari Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 When I signed up for this site, I'd narrowed myself down to being asexual or demisexual (albeit biromantic.) I figured I might as well just think of myself as asexual, since if I hadn't felt sexual attraction to anyone yet, I probably never would. The girl upon whom I've had a crush for the last several months talked to me last night about how much she missed having sex, and how much she wished she could find someone to have sex with. When I tried to change the subject, we wound up talking about my writing, and she told me that I ought to go out and have sex with someone so I could write better sex scenes. Goddamnit. (If it sounds like she's flirting with me, she's not--she talks this way to my aged mother, too. This girl has no concept of boundaries.) Link to post Share on other sites
Gho St Ory Qwan Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 So how does this change your asexuality? Link to post Share on other sites
Feo Takahari Posted December 10, 2011 Author Share Posted December 10, 2011 So how does this change your asexuality? It changes it because I was actually interested. Well, interested isn't even the right word--it was more of a need, like what I imagine drug addicts must feel. (I've never felt anything like this before, and I have barely any frame of reference with which to approach it.) Edit: Then again, when I think more about it, it wasn't exactly a need to cattle-prod the oyster ditch with the lab rocket. It was more a need to make her happy, whatever that would entail . . . Link to post Share on other sites
Rivan Vox Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 So how does this change your asexuality? It changes it because I was actually interested. Well, interested isn't even the right word--it was more of a need, like what I imagine drug addicts must feel. (I've never felt anything like this before, and I have barely any frame of reference with which to approach it.) Edit: Then again, when I think more about it, it wasn't exactly a need to cattle-prod the oyster ditch with the lab rocket. It was more a need to make her happy, whatever that would entail . . . Invest in a nice vibrator and give to her as a gift? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 What'd you say in response? You should proposition her "as a joke" and see what her response is. Link to post Share on other sites
Gho St Ory Qwan Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 Being interested in sex to make another happy doesn't stop you from being asexual. loads of people have sex with their partners to show their love, even though they're not sexually attracted to them. This depends on if you started being sexually attracted to her or not (to the AVEN definitions anyway). I mean I've considered sex with 2 people before (only for a short time haha, but it was still something I seriously considered). It didn't mean I was attracted to them in a new way, for me personally anyway. And yeah, I'd do what SkulleryMaid said. It might be fun, regardless of the response. just testing out how you feel by discussing it more can give you a better understanding of yourself. And experiments are fun. =] Link to post Share on other sites
never odd or even Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 curiosity is not a crime. if it was i'm pretty sure i'd be dead :) Link to post Share on other sites
Gho St Ory Qwan Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 curiosity is not a crime. if it was i'm pretty sure i'd be dead :) I read on wikipedia it killed cats. And wikipedias word is law. Link to post Share on other sites
LiteralNovice Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Being interested in sex to make another happy doesn't stop you from being asexual. loads of people have sex with their partners to show their love, even though they're not sexually attracted to them. This depends on if you started being sexually attracted to her or not (to the AVEN definitions anyway). I mean I've considered sex with 2 people before (only for a short time haha, but it was still something I seriously considered). It didn't mean I was attracted to them in a new way, for me personally anyway. And yeah, I'd do what SkulleryMaid said. It might be fun, regardless of the response. just testing out how you feel by discussing it more can give you a better understanding of yourself. And experiments are fun. =] ^ Link to post Share on other sites
Mirai19 Posted December 20, 2011 Share Posted December 20, 2011 curiosity is not a crime. if it was i'm pretty sure i'd be dead :) I read on wikipedia it killed cats. And wikipedias word is law. That made me laugh. :D I also have considered having sex with someone but it wasn't anything at all to do with seeing them in a new light, it was purely out of curiosity or feeling obliged to. I'm glad I decided not to in the end. But I saw somebody post on here that whether or not you enjoy sex isn't a factor in asexuality, and I'm inclined to agree with that. Link to post Share on other sites
Texace 12 Posted December 20, 2011 Share Posted December 20, 2011 It was more a need to make her happy, whatever that would entail . . . That's how I lost my virginity. I had this really strong crush on someone back in '06 and she knew I was an almost 22 year old virgin, so she really wanted to have sex with me. I didn't know I was asexual back then, but wasn't too fond of the idea and I basically wanted to prove it to her that I liked her, so I actually did have sex with her... on a Friday the 13th! lol I later found out that she had sex with some ex boyfriend in San Antonio the DAY after I lost it to her. I lost my virginity to prove that I liked someone, and I was thoroughly convinced that that was what I wanted because I was so blinded by love. But it's cool now because I realize I'm ace, and I would never have sex with someone to prove that I love them--or for ANY reason for that matter! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.