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#1 rafi

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 05:53 PM

I have been wondering about asexuals that masturbate and feel the need too, are they realy asexuals ?

Let me explain, when I masturbate, I have to think of something that turns me on, a fantasy, something I am attracted to.
But the very deffinition of asexuality is one who feels NO sexual attraction.

So please give me fead back on what you all think and have experienced.

I somehow feel a strong need to get some answers on this topic.

thank you all in advance!

#2 Faelights

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 05:56 PM

Moved from The Gray Area to Asexual Q&A.

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#3 Måskemigselvetsted

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:02 PM

Yes, they are.
I have read about several people who doesn't think about anything or who's thoughts just wander. And even if they didn't they would still be ace because they might be turned on by something the fantasy do or something. But, if they were to actually meet those persons they fantazied about in real life, they wouldn't feel sexual attraction toward them. If they met them real life and if the felt sexual attraction toward them, they wouldn't be asexual, but until then, it just shows that their body functions.. (:

#4 Disabled Account

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:03 PM

Well, only because you have fantasies about something, doesnt mean you want it to come true. Also, it's not necessary to think of sex or sex related stuff (for lack of a better word) in order to masturbate.

#5 Vampyremage

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:12 PM

Some asexuals have a libido and thus masturbate. Some require fantasies to do so and some don't, although the prerequisite of fantasies doesn't mean that a person is any less asexual. Sometimes those fantasies don't even have to do with sex directly. For example, there are plenty of asexuals who have certain fetishes and those are the primary topic of their fantasies.

Speaking personally, I do have a libido although it is very very low. I can go months without it rearing its head, although every once and a while I feel the need to feed it. However, when I masturbate I rarely think of any specific fantasies and when I do, it has to do with a couple of fetishes I have as opposed to anything directly sex related.
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#6 Meph

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:12 PM

I masturbate from month to month, but i never think about anything... I just do it to... you know... scratch the itch?
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#7 Velveteen

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:16 PM

Sexual attraction is not the same thing as libido. People masturbate in order to satisfy their libidos. For sexuals this may involve thoughts of those people who they are sexually attracted towards, but masturbation is essentially a biological function and so does not necessarily require any sexual thoughts (just as, for [want of a better] example, when eating, you don't need to be thinking about how tasty the food is in order for your hunger to be satisfied).

Asexuals who masturbate do so because they have a libido, not because they are attracted to someone.

(There have actually been numerous threads dealing with this exact topic, but it's quicker for me to just type up a response than it is to scroll through endless search results...) :P
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#8 Eratosthenes

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:19 PM

I get turned on by things that have nothing to do with sex and don't involve/require a partner at all. I've almost never felt an actual need to masturbate; I just do it when I'm bored.

#9 Raccoons & Arca N.H.

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 06:31 PM

I guess I'm basically repeating what the others have said here :P

Sexual attraction =/= libido (masturbation, e.t.c.). That's kind of an important fact to remember.

Libido exists separate from sexual attraction. So thus, you can have a libido and not experience sexual attraction (which would be, an asexual who masturbates). And vice versa, you can experience sexual attraction and not experience a libido.

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#10 Hap2

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 07:57 PM

Orientation refers to direction mate, not behaviour.

So for a lot of asexuals, masturbation is about the sensation or to relieve libido, 'scratch the itch' as some people have said. Just because someone is ace, doesn't mean the plumbing doesn't work, or that they can't be affected by hormones and chemicals triggered off by the brain.

I think you're confusing the term with the literal meaning of 'not sexual'. You have to remember that words rarely are ever used in the literal sense though. That the word 'asexual' here, refers to orientation and not particular behaviour.
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#11 Data

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 07:59 PM

Let me explain, when I masturbate, I have to think of something that turns me on, a fantasy, something I am attracted to.
But the very deffinition of asexuality is one who feels NO sexual attraction.


I can masturbate to fantasies, porn, erotica, fetishes I don't like penetration but I one of the things that I watch involves oral so that still seems like sex to me (not sure why exactly people make the distinction) or when thinking about nothing, or when focusing on what I feel when masturbating all of those seem to feel very similar to me, the most intensity is probably in focusing on what I feel like, but that also require the most effort lol.

#12 xMachismo

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Posted 28 September 2011 - 10:30 PM

I have been wondering about asexuals that masturbate and feel the need too, are they realy asexuals ?

Let me explain, when I masturbate, I have to think of something that turns me on, a fantasy, something I am attracted to.
But the very deffinition of asexuality is one who feels NO sexual attraction.


An asexual can masturbate and still be an asexual. Enjoying sexual stimulation doesn't mean that you are sexually attracted to. Would you say that you're sexually attracted to the things in your fantasy, or do you just enjoy thinking about the stimulation?

Here are some important questions to ask yourself?
Have you ever had sex before? And if so, did you feel sexually attracted to the person? And if the answer to that is yes, would you feel sexually attracted to a stranger, or was it someone who you were comfortable with and loved? When you fantasize about sex, do you fantasize about a person you have strong feelings for?

I've been aroused a few times, not a sexual arousal, mind you, but an emotional one. I confused it with a sexual one, but I was very confused because I don't feel any sort of sexual stimulation, nor do I ever have the desire to have sex with anyone. In fact, when I tried, I felt so repulsed and I actually felt that I had taken advantage of myself. I'm not an expert, but I've been reading up on masturbation/enjoyment of sex in asexuals to see if, maybe, I could somehow learn to be able to tolerate sex and to be able to do it with my partner.
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#13 That One

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 03:49 AM

I get physically aroused quite easily, even though psychologically I'm not interested. I masturbate a few times a month when something like this comes up partially because I enjoy orgasm and partially because it calms me down faster. When I do, I don't picture anything, I just concentrate on the sensations in order to achieve orgasm more quickly. I find sex boring and repetitive, but masturbation is fine because a) it only takes 2-3 minutes and b) it's guaranteed to end well for me.

#14 Ahmad89

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 05:10 AM

When I masturbate, I fantasize about someone playing with my feet. I've never masturbated to the thought of sex with either a girl or guy.
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#15 Cirdan

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 09:40 AM

Let me explain, when I masturbate, I have to think of something that turns me on, a fantasy, something I am attracted to.

Not everyone is like that. I can quite happily play with myself thinking of nothing in particular. Some of the time it is literally nothing, others I'm focused on the sensation I'm experiencing. Or I could be thinking about the grocery shopping, a computer strategy game, or yes, even how much I love my girlfriend. I guess the point is it's pretty much irrelevant what I'm thinking, it's something which I only do on my own, feels nice and relieves tension down there - if I don't for a while then I end up getting more and more frequent erections which can be annoying.

#16 PiF

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 09:42 AM

I have been wondering about asexuals that masturbate and feel the need too, I somehow feel a strong need to get some answers on this topic.



new investion..it's called the aven search facility..it might help :rolleyes:

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#17 Vampyremage

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 04:54 PM

Let me explain, when I masturbate, I have to think of something that turns me on, a fantasy, something I am attracted to.

Not everyone is like that. I can quite happily play with myself thinking of nothing in particular. Some of the time it is literally nothing, others I'm focused on the sensation I'm experiencing. Or I could be thinking about the grocery shopping, a computer strategy game, or yes, even how much I love my girlfriend. I guess the point is it's pretty much irrelevant what I'm thinking, it's something which I only do on my own, feels nice and relieves tension down there - if I don't for a while then I end up getting more and more frequent erections which can be annoying.


That's pretty much how it is for me in a nutshell. I am of the understanding that usually when sexuals masturbate, they think of something that turns them on and depending on how imaginative the sexual, they might even think of an entire arousing scene in their head. While I have thought about such things in the past, it seems to make little or no difference at all to my enjoyment of the act or my ability to finish, so to speak. The physical sensations are pretty much the only thing I need and I don't really need any imagery to help that along, either inside my head or by watching porn.
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#18 Måskemigselvetsted

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 05:52 PM


I have been wondering about asexuals that masturbate and feel the need too, I somehow feel a strong need to get some answers on this topic.



new investion..it's called the aven search facility..it might help :rolleyes:

... A new invention? That would be if the search thing actually worked. As it is now, it's nearly impossible to find something specific. Or I'm just bad at it :unsure:
But masturbation shouldn't be too hard to find.

#19 Great Thief Yatagarasu

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 06:57 PM

Sometimes, when I'm trying to get to sleep and I'm really bored, I'll try and masturbate, but I have no real drive to do it, and I can't really think of anything while I'm doing it. I can TRY to think of something hot, but it just distracts me.
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#20 RandomDent

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 11:06 PM



I have been wondering about asexuals that masturbate and feel the need too, I somehow feel a strong need to get some answers on this topic.



new investion..it's called the aven search facility..it might help :rolleyes:

... A new invention? That would be if the search thing actually worked. As it is now, it's nearly impossible to find something specific. Or I'm just bad at it :unsure:
But masturbation shouldn't be too hard to find.


I typed in masturbation and got 392 results.

Maybe I just have a knack for finding wankers? ;)

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#21 Member33070

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 11:25 PM

x

#22 FrozenCherry

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Posted 29 September 2011 - 11:31 PM

... I just do it to... you know... scratch the itch?



Yes!!!! Well said I have to turn it to fit to my mouth :P
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#23 ignoranceisn'tbliss

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Posted 30 September 2011 - 02:06 AM

*ignores most of posts*
Fantasy is far from sexual attraction. My strange fetishy thing (which confuses me sometimes) does not really involve sex, but may, and even some of the "sexual" things in there may not be sexual depending on how one sees it. Now I masturbate daily to this stuff and I actually prefer when there is little to no focus on sex, as I see masturbation as something that is partially addiction to the physical pleasure, partially as some mysterious thing that I'm not able to force myself to stop for more than a few weeks, and partially as something that really cuts into my sleeping time, and sexual things just don't seem relevant to my masturbation.
That being said, I tend to have thoughts related to the stuff I view pop in at times, but these thoughts rarely stick and are about as randomly occurring as other barely relevant things I think up. Nor have I ever felt a sexual attraction or arousal toward a person who would appear in these thoughts or at any other time for whatever reason.

In short, I masturbate frequently to a type of situation yet have never felt sexual attraction toward a person who would be in thoughts of such situations.
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#24 rafi

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Posted 30 September 2011 - 02:07 PM

Thank you all so much for your open and candid answers, they are very appreciated.

The reason of my question is that I am presently in transformation, from the human especies to something else. I know this sounds wacko.
I do not know what the new especie will look like but have some clues. For one it will not have any sexual needs, so it will not have any sexual organs. It will not need to reproduce because it will be immortal and unlimited.

It will also have no need to eat or drink.

I know I know, some of you will tell me I have totaly lost it. Let me ask you this, did the ape know or could imagine what evolution had reserved for him ? that is exactly where humanity is, only bigger, we are not headed into an other form of animality, we are, at the present, transforming into something else then a new form of animal.

You want a proof? THIS SITE and all of you. Asexuality is the perfict evidance of what I said above. It is not natural in the animal world to have asexuality. Asexuality is one of the signes of human transformation.

look up these sites if you would like more info http://www.personocr...om/en/index.php
http://www.dianequiose.com/english.htm

#25 ignoranceisn'tbliss

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Posted 01 October 2011 - 07:50 PM

You want a proof? THIS SITE and all of you. Asexuality is the perfict evidance of what I said above. It is not natural in the animal world to have asexuality. Asexuality is one of the signes of human transformation.

Uh, isn't evolution a natural process and variation natural?
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#26 Meph

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Posted 01 October 2011 - 08:14 PM

Thank you all so much for your open and candid answers, they are very appreciated.

The reason of my question is that I am presently in transformation, from the human especies to something else. I know this sounds wacko.
I do not know what the new especie will look like but have some clues. For one it will not have any sexual needs, so it will not have any sexual organs. It will not need to reproduce because it will be immortal and unlimited.

It will also have no need to eat or drink.

I know I know, some of you will tell me I have totaly lost it. Let me ask you this, did the ape know or could imagine what evolution had reserved for him ? that is exactly where humanity is, only bigger, we are not headed into an other form of animality, we are, at the present, transforming into something else then a new form of animal.

You want a proof? THIS SITE and all of you. Asexuality is the perfict evidance of what I said above. It is not natural in the animal world to have asexuality. Asexuality is one of the signes of human transformation.

look up these sites if you would like more info http://www.personocr...om/en/index.php
http://www.dianequiose.com/english.htm

Do some research into mechanical science. There is research being done on how to enhance humans, with technology. Eternal life, no need to eat, etc... The future ofr humans is techonogical evolution, and I am a faithful supporter of it. You can watch the documentary "Transcendent Man" which explains it quite well, also just read a lot of Human/machine related science.
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#27 asexual

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Posted 02 October 2011 - 10:24 PM

I understand what you are asking because I've tried to masturbate but could not become aroused because I didn't know what to think about to get me aroused. Neither gender "turns me on". I just found it made me frustrated. In a way sexually frustrated ?

#28 MadmanPanda

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Posted 05 October 2011 - 05:11 PM

I have read about several people who doesn't think about anything or who's thoughts just wander. And even if they didn't they would still be ace because they might be turned on by something the fantasy do or something.


I agree with this completely! I do masturbate, a lot! :D When I do, I don't think about anything. I just focus on the task at hand. When I do think of something a lot of the time it turns me off. Especially when I try to "fantasize" and imagine myself with someone, that just ruins everything! Sometimes, I can watch porn, but I'd prefer to do it without. I'm pretty sure that masturbation doesn't mean that you're sexually attracted to someone, hence you're still asexual. I guess it depends more on if you fantasize and what you fantasize about.

Edited by NigelFt, 05 October 2011 - 08:22 PM.
Fixed quote

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#29 robintamblyn

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Posted 22 October 2011 - 02:17 PM

I find it's a (fairly) effective cure for menstrual pain...I only found this out a few months ago when I googled what good pain relievers there were...wish I'd known 20 years ago!
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#30 Aloren

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Posted 22 October 2011 - 04:57 PM

I find it's a (fairly) effective cure for menstrual pain...I only found this out a few months ago when I googled what good pain relievers there were...wish I'd known 20 years ago!


Really ?? That is fascinating. Totally going to try that even though I don't really masturbate anymore.




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