Jump to content

Sexual Fantasies *TMI Warning*


Member33070

Recommended Posts

TMI warning again!

Okay. Just wondering.

Since grays do sometimes experience sexual attraction, if that includes fantasies for you, what are they like? How detailed are they? How often do you experience them? What, if anything, seems to trigger them more?

Do you think they're less intense than ones a sexual might have? (this is an argument I've seen pop up, that the level of attraction grays experience is lower)

I will share mine once I have a full keyboard :blush:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Since grays do sometimes experience sexual attraction, if that includes fantasies for you, what are they like?

Nice. :wub: :wub: :wub:

How detailed are they?

Very detailed because I have good imagination, but probably very, very unrealistic because I have never had sex. :lol:

How often do you experience them? What, if anything, seems to trigger them more?

Many times a day. Horniness triggers them, I bet. :lol: Or I don´t know what. I fantasize usually during masturbation. Videos and photos can trigger it too.

But nothing compares to real contact in real life. :rolleyes: The Day when I was taken to the sky and striken to my knees in the same moment... :wub: I spent the whole concert with my eyes staring at Eric, and confused to the death what the Hell did happen and why...

Do you think they're less intense than ones a sexual might have? (this is an argument I've seen pop up, that the level of attraction grays experience is lower)

No. Every sexual can envy me. :P

I will share mine once I have a full keyboard :blush:

I will not share. They are private. I wouldn´t share it if it was real sex, so I don´t want to share it even if it´s not real. :D

Link to post
Share on other sites

Since grays do sometimes experience sexual attraction, if that includes fantasies for you, what are they like? How detailed are they? How often do you experience them? What, if anything, seems to trigger them more?

They can be very detailed. I don't have them much, but I'm on meds that can lower libido, so there's that. I can come up with complex and crazy scenarios.

Do you think they're less intense than ones a sexual might have? (this is an argument I've seen pop up, that the level of attraction grays experience is lower)

I've never thought the intensity was lower, just maybe the frequency and the narrowness of the criteria. I don't see why greys can't be intensely attracted. I've felt that way before. (But not toward anyone I was actually in a relationship with. For me, part of it may also be not experiencing sexual attraction in real life circumstances, only in fantasy. I am not demisexual because I've been in long term sexual relationships with emotional bonding but still did not get sexually attracted to that person, I felt exactly the same toward them as you'd feel toward a best friend. On the other hand, in college there was one guy I was intensely sexually attracted to in fantasy, and I still actually have dreams about him, but I never pursued a relationship with him, even though it seemed he may have been at least mildly interested in me. Anyway, this is one reason I consider myself to be ambiguously attracted. Well, the one guy I did have sex with I maybe was sort of attracted to, but even then it felt ambiguous and.. I dunno. Hard to explain.)

Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't think I've ever been sexually attracted to another individual, and therefore do not consider myself Grey. However, I have had fantasies of the sensations that might occur during sexual interaction with another non-specific individual. I don't attribute any characteristics to the hypothetical being at all, just that they're giving me good feelings. XD

I don't know about extreme detail, but my imagination is good enough to come up with elaborate situations in which sexual interaction might occur, as well as how it might feel. I certainly don't think my fantasies are any less intense than what a sexual might have; I do achieve orgasm when I masturbate. I don't masturbate or fantasize regularly though, they tend to come in spurts every one to three months. I think they might be triggered by hormones?

The reason I'm posting here is because I suppose this does make me wonder sometimes if I could really legitimately identify as asexual. I don't lose any sleep over it though.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I identify almost completely with Fae, who describes almost exactly how I feel. However, the only reason I identify as "a tiny bit gray" is because I was sexually attracted to someone about a year(ish) ago. It lasted about two hours. That isolated case doesn't bother me, except when I try to find a label to use when participating in these gray discussions. Oh, well.

I continue to experience fantasies of some sort... but I often wonder if they count as sexual fantasies, or if it's just raw libido. I'll explain in more detail.

What are they like? How detailed are they?

Very vague. It's like visualizing patches of light while experiencing the warm sensation from receiving a hug. I'm not a very visual person, so this might just be due to having an underactive imagination... but somehow, I know that these imaginations are clearly sensual.

How often do you experience them? What, if anything, seems to trigger them more?

Probably once every 2-4 weeks. I just feel an overwhelming sense that it's "time" to get some form of release, but it's usually triggered by something I read or see online. I use erotica to aid in achieving arousal, but I always need to look away or close my eyes and focus on the patches of light in order to achieve climax. Anything detailed (like visualizing people, even in non-sensual poses) will completely ruin the climax.

Also, continuing to seek arousal after climax is distasteful. It's like continuing to eat after having already gorged yourself.

Do you think they're less intense than ones a sexual might have?

Yes, definitely.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Quill Pen Gentleman

Extremly vague. :lol:

I actually start randomly fantasizing about stuff during a boring class becuase when the professors start talking about how people would have sex in the past (no details), I start thinking about them.

I've made anime girls "doing it" cliche for my fantasies, since that's what usually turns me on.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Gosh, while I can't masturbate and am fairly certain I've never been sexually attracted to anyone.

Anyways, I fantasize only for a relatively short duration of time using very vague 'fantasy characters'. Even if such people matching the descriptions even existed, I still wouldn't want to have sex or do sexual acts with them. It would seem unnatural and no matter how hard... Yes, I used to try to force sexual thoughts with people I found aesthetically attractive, only to feel very embarrassed and awkward in the end. :unsure:

In fact, I don't even know if I'd enjoy sex if I were in such a relationship. Well, maybe I'm just keeping the light on in case I'd like it. -_-

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not gray( grey ;) ) but I do have sexual fantasies. Actually, I'll have them quite often, sometimes. The worst thing is is that sometimes they'll be so intense that I will wake up from a dreamy and I'm often very aroused when I do. It goes away.

The people in my fantasies are usually fuzzy- as in, I can't remember details about them later or even now if I start trying to concentrate on a specific detail. The fantasies are more like what Fae described- the idea of how it could or would feel. That can get pretty detailed.

Sometimes they are dreams, and sometimes I fantasize because I'm very simply bored and it is something to do. Oddly enough, none of this ever made me doubt being asexual.

@Birdwing- I don't have a music fetish, but I do that exact same thing sometimes. And sometimes it means that I can't listen to a specific song for awhile because all it does is bring up that same fantasy again.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Since grays do sometimes experience sexual attraction, if that includes fantasies for you, what are they like? How detailed are they? How often do you experience them? What, if anything, seems to trigger them more?

I am very much on the wavelength of many here. Particularised fantasies can arouse me and do on a more or less daily basis but never do I feel like living them out in real life. I never really think about the details of the characters in my fantasies, basic info is obvious such as that they are usually two males, there is usually an imbalance of sexual power but rarely what they were wearing for example. The details more often than not from constituent parts of the idea of the fantasy. And that is the point I often try to articulate, it's the idea of these things I like, never the reality. Sometimes a detail on a tv programme can trigger them or something in real life but a detachment from what i consider to be my real existence then occurs.

Do you think they're less intense than ones a sexual might have? (this is an argument I've seen pop up, that the level of attraction grays experience is lower)

Yes I do. I rarely feel as satisfied from the feelings the fantasies give me as I have heard from sexuals all the time. Their language is full of superlatives and hyperbole to explain their orgasm. My feelings are enjoyable no doubt but do not feel to be on the same level of intensity at all but then this may just be down to subjective differences in the experience of an emotion. Moreover, I'd add that the physical manifestations of the excitement within me reflect the lower intensity, for example lack of heat or reduction in the amount of come. (Hope that is not too graphic but feels appropriate to mention as part of my point.) Maybe however I am also misled by the ways that these experiences are portrayed in the media etc. having not had much real experience of the intensity of a sexual encounter or the emotional and physical manifestations of it.

Link to post
Share on other sites

When...um...participating in my fetish, for one. Ugh, this makes it sound more horrible than it is. *sigh* I have a sexual music fetish. Certain songs trigger the fantasies, and they follow the theme of the song. So when I listen to the song, it can trigger a fantasy that lasts the entire length of the song and is synced to it.

This is so weird, but I get such a similar thing o: I have this thing for guys that can sing. I dunno, I'm just really attracted to all my favourite male singers (and have squishes on my favourite female singers). But yeah, I also get like certain songs bring on this weird feeling of just being really turned on, mainly kind of goosebumpy rather than stirrings in the nether regions mind you, but I end up fantasising whenever I'm listening to them.

(Oh and I got this insane crush on a guy I didn't know at all after seeing him play saxophone at a school concert thing. I was sighing and everything, kind of embarrassing ahaa)

I think my fantasies are kind of sensual without being specifically sexual all the time.. if that makes sense? It's kind of all quite passionate and sensual, but mainly stays above the waist... I dunno if they count as sexual fantasies really? Also, I'm much more of an auditory thinker than visual so I have difficulty getting the details of people's faces sometimes, which can be a little frustrating. But that's also probably where the music thing comes from. My fantasies often start with a cute guy singing like a flirty song to me.. omg I'm such a little girl haha.

They're pretty frequent I think, but then I do daydream a lot in general, and I'm kind of a hopeless romantic.

I don't think mine are any less intense than sexuals' fantasies. In fact, I'd go as far as saying they're even more intense, but probably for different reasons. I get very emotionally attached to them.

Talking about them just confuses me even more omg..

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not gray either, but I think I've had sexual fantasies. I just can't remember what they're like. They feel more like quick flashes of ideas. I guess that says a lot. :blush: The kind of "sex" I picture in my fantasies is nothing like "real" sex, it's more like a libido-driven version of cuddling/caressing someone in bed. I wouldn't want to fulfill those fantasies since I know it would be a disappointment.

Link to post
Share on other sites

^ How do you know that?

Not trying to be rude, just curious.

Because I've had sex (my girlfriend was sexual and asked for it), and I know it's nothing like it is in my fantasies. It's way too... sexual. I guess I like the idea that there can be something more intense than just cuddling and kissing, but I don't like sex itself. I hope that made sense. :)

Link to post
Share on other sites

^ Hmm, okay. Fair enough. Thanks for that.

I'm a virgin, so everything I imagine is...imagined. I don't know what it's actually like. So that's an interesting concept, that I might like the fantasies and then the actual sex would bother me, when I try it.

Hmm. I think that's the first time I've said that. "When I try it". Instead of "if I try it"...

whooooa this is just so weird you guys. I just can't get over this switch of mine. :wacko:

Link to post
Share on other sites

^ Hmm, okay. Fair enough. Thanks for that.

I'm a virgin, so everything I imagine is...imagined. I don't know what it's actually like. So that's an interesting concept, that I might like the fantasies and then the actual sex would bother me, when I try it.

Hmm. I think that's the first time I've said that. "When I try it". Instead of "if I try it"...

whooooa this is just so weird you guys. I just can't get over this switch of mine. :wacko:

Must be a really mind-boggling experience. :D I have no idea how I would react if I suddenly developed a proper sex drive.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't think I've ever been sexually attracted to another individual, and therefore do not consider myself Grey. However, I have had fantasies of the sensations that might occur during sexual interaction with another non-specific individual. I don't attribute any characteristics to the hypothetical being at all, just that they're giving me good feelings. XD

I don't know about extreme detail, but my imagination is good enough to come up with elaborate situations in which sexual interaction might occur, as well as how it might feel. I certainly don't think my fantasies are any less intense than what a sexual might have; I do achieve orgasm when I masturbate. I don't masturbate or fantasize regularly though, they tend to come in spurts every one to three months. I think they might be triggered by hormones?

The reason I'm posting here is because I suppose this does make me wonder sometimes if I could really legitimately identify as asexual. I don't lose any sleep over it though.

I am the same way Fae. I feel that since I really don't have that attraction to another person, even when I really care for them that I might as well be totally asexual. Anytime I have a weird passing idea, I'm actually pretty turned off by the whole idea. It really only comes around during my cycle so I'm fairly sure it's all about hormones.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I am the same way. I could never imagine wanting to act on my fetishes in real life. They're just whimsies that bring me a bit of enjoyment every now and then. It does really help you to get mega-confused over how to define yourself though! The best comment that I relate to entirely is 'the sexualness in my fantasies is too sexual to consider in real life'. It's amazing that others are on this wavelength and comforting as it can feel rather lonely most of the time!

Link to post
Share on other sites

Is it strange to say that you fantasize about a fictional character rather than an existing person? Personally, I could never even think of doing something like that with a real human being. The thought of initiating in the actual act just disgusts me and I can't stand the image of sexual organs whether they are female or male.

I'm led to believe that it's because these characters are created to sell and so we see none of their flaws whereas we see flaws in actual human beings, causing that perfect, ideal image to shatter.

In that case, would this still be considered gray?

...Actually, should I start a separate thread for this? My apologies if this is out of place.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Is it strange to say that you fantasize about a fictional character rather than an existing person? Personally, I could never even think of doing something like that with a real human being. The thought of initiating in the actual act just disgusts me and I can't stand the image of sexual organs whether they are female or male.

I'm led to believe that it's because these characters are created to sell and so we see none of their flaws whereas we see flaws in actual human beings, causing that perfect, ideal image to shatter.

In that case, would this still be considered gray?

...Actually, should I start a separate thread for this? My apologies if this is out of place.

I agree with you partially (and let.. hm.. Birdwing and others answer answer to if this is still gray.. I don't have any real opinion actually) but I can tell you true stories from my life. I have met and known and do know people in person who are "larger than life" (a metaphor for people who you normally only see in movies and read about in fictional books). Because of their.. flaws.. combined with.. perfection.. they are surreal and fictional. I have learned much from these people.. that truth and human reality can many times be stranger than fiction because I never actually saw those RL persons in any movie or book (though some got close!). Yet they existed and exists. Sadly.. when it comes to "stardom".. 50 cent expresses more than well (he is at least honest with what he is in for).. get rich or die trying. The people I have met did not have money in the "aim".. though some of them became rich for what they did.. for a while.. but they were of different reasons seeking the most extreme and unusual experiences.. because that is their way of life.. or dealing with life. And when I think of these persons.. some of them actually being famous (more or less).. well.. their way of expressing themselves is indeed appealing/"attractive" (language barrier).

When it comes to fantasies.. like I have written before.. I enhance someone else's wishes (no matter what they consist of as long as it is far away from emotional owning and "negative desire").. so.. I guess.. I am "hardcore", LOL.. but yet.. NOT.. I grant people wishes.. that is what I do. If that makes me "soft" or "hard".. well.. does not matter to me. However.. I very rarely fantasise about a person that I do not know IN person. Because I would not know what.. I would fantasise about.

Quoting loosely Chloe from the movie Chloe:

I've always been pretty good with words. It’s part of my job to know where to place my hand, my lips, my tongue, my leg, and even my thoughts... what kind of pressure, for how long, and when to stop.

I can become your first kiss or a torn out image from Playboy that you found when you were nine years old. Am I your secretary, or am I your wife? Maybe I’m your seventh grade math teacher you always hated. All I know is that if I do it just right, I can become your living, breathing unflinching dream. And then, I can actually... disappear.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Is it strange to say that you fantasize about a fictional character rather than an existing person? Personally, I could never even think of doing something like that with a real human being. The thought of initiating in the actual act just disgusts me and I can't stand the image of sexual organs whether they are female or male.

I'm led to believe that it's because these characters are created to sell and so we see none of their flaws whereas we see flaws in actual human beings, causing that perfect, ideal image to shatter.

In that case, would this still be considered gray?

...Actually, should I start a separate thread for this? My apologies if this is out of place.

I agree with you partially (and let.. hm.. Birdwing and others answer answer to if this is still gray.. I don't have any real opinion actually) but I can tell you true stories from my life. I have met and known and do know people in person who are "larger than life" (a metaphor for people who you normally only see in movies and read about in fictional books). Because of their.. flaws.. combined with.. perfection.. they are surreal and fictional. I have learned much from these people.. that truth and human reality can many times be stranger than fiction because I never actually saw those RL persons in any movie or book (though some got close!). Yet they existed and exists. Sadly.. when it comes to "stardom".. 50 cent expresses more than well (he is at least honest with what he is in for).. get rich or die trying. The people I have met did not have money in the "aim".. though some of them became rich for what they did.. for a while.. but they were of different reasons seeking the most extreme and unusual experiences.. because that is their way of life.. or dealing with life. And when I think of these persons.. some of them actually being famous (more or less).. well.. their way of expressing themselves is indeed appealing/"attractive" (language barrier).

When it comes to fantasies.. like I have written before.. I enhance someone else's wishes (no matter what they consist of as long as it is far away from emotional owning and "negative desire").. so.. I guess.. I am "hardcore", LOL.. but yet.. NOT.. I grant people wishes.. that is what I do. If that makes me "soft" or "hard".. well.. does not matter to me. However.. I very rarely fantasise about a person that I do not know IN person. Because I would not know what.. I would fantasise about.

Quoting loosely Chloe from the movie Chloe:

I've always been pretty good with words. It’s part of my job to know where to place my hand, my lips, my tongue, my leg, and even my thoughts... what kind of pressure, for how long, and when to stop.

I can become your first kiss or a torn out image from Playboy that you found when you were nine years old. Am I your secretary, or am I your wife? Maybe I’m your seventh grade math teacher you always hated. All I know is that if I do it just right, I can become your living, breathing unflinching dream. And then, I can actually... disappear.

Yes, I feel like if I got to know some of these people and realized that they were indeed human and not products of fantasy, the attraction would fade away rather quickly. That must sound so shallow, but I simply cannot imagine having sex with an actual person. It's just that the fantasy where you control everything and absolutely know that there will be no negative outcome is so much more alluring.

I've personally never met any of these mythical people you speak of and until today, I didn't know they existed. (Actually, I'm still a little doubtful.) Even if they do, they are still human with their own ambitions, so I quite doubt the circumstances would change much for me anyway /:

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've personally never met any of these mythical people you speak of and until today, I didn't know they existed. (Actually, I'm still a little doubtful.) Even if they do, they are still human with their own ambitions, so I quite doubt the circumstances would change much for me anyway /:

They indeed ARE humans.. no more.. no less. Their expression of life is what differs. And that would be a general truth about humans... we all have different ways of expressing ourselves. Though Others views often determines what we will be in the "public collective view". Not who we really are... again.. humans. Many artists/etc and others actually says this... some more clearly than others though.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Since grays do sometimes experience sexual attraction, if that includes fantasies for you, what are they like?

Generally they're rather idealized and dont generally involve myself but fantasy characters, whether from some fiction or my own imagination. I think this is because Im not particularly attracted to many myself and imagining myself with someone ideal would be weird. On a very very rare occassion they involve me with someone else that I am attracted to and could actually imagine being with.

How detailed are they?

Completely depends, but generally I have an easy time imagining what the people look like and the setting but not the actual act so much.

How often do you experience them?

Fluctuates depending, sometimes I get wrapped up in something sexualized and fantasize often, but I can also go for weeks without, and fantasies involving myself I could go completely without because they make me feel totally uncomfortable.

What, if anything, seems to trigger them more?

Infatuation with a particular something or another, which always gets included. Ranges from characters to fetishes, even if I personally have none. It's sort of odd.

Do you think they're less intense than ones a sexual might have?

Possibly, probably. But this is probably tied with my nonexistent libido.

I don't really care to share; I don't really like them in the first place and tend to bother me.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Mine involve touching, caressing, and letting a woman fall asleep in my arms... but never actual sex.

BTW the objects of my fantasies are clothed, usually in skin-tight outfits or puffy dresses... :blink:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Gosh, while I can't masturbate and am fairly certain I've never been sexually attracted to anyone.

Anyways, I fantasize only for a relatively short duration of time using very vague 'fantasy characters'. Even if such people matching the descriptions even existed, I still wouldn't want to have sex or do sexual acts with them. It would seem unnatural and no matter how hard... Yes, I used to try to force sexual thoughts with people I found aesthetically attractive, only to feel very embarrassed and awkward in the end. :unsure:

In fact, I don't even know if I'd enjoy sex if I were in such a relationship. Well, maybe I'm just keeping the light on in case I'd like it. -_-

I can't imagine anyone in reality in any type of sexual way, either. Yeah, I have a few fantasy characters, but they don't last long. Imagining real people is just weird and unnatural as you said. I tried to imagine if my boyfriend, but that is even harder. I was hoping that I might enjoy sex in a relationship, but when I am with my boyfriend, I can't even imagine fantasy characters or think of sex. My mind just goes sex-blind. And as it turned out, no I don't enjoy sex in a relationship. This might be TMI but there is this one point during intercourse that I think is what people find really pleasurable, but I just feel overwhelmed and have to tell him to stop or change angle so I don't feel it again or as much.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
×
×
  • Create New...