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Facebook should have more than two options when it comes to sexual orientation


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#1 briliantlyfreakish

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 06:54 PM

Seriously. It should. There are more than to orientations out there. It assumes that everyone is sexual, and that they are either gay or straight. Why isn't asexual on there? Pansexual? What about people who are polyamourus? They don't allow you to state that you are in a relationship with more than one person. It might at least open a few people's eyes to the world around them if these options were available. I know I don't have all the options up here, I am just saying, maybe we need to petition facebook to change up their options in that respect.

#2 PiF

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 06:56 PM

in the big scheme of things..i never need facebook to legitimize me

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#3 Gho St Ory Qwan

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:02 PM

Agreed. It won't let me be in a complicated relationship with the world. I feel like I'm lying even though I try to periodically change who I'm in a complicated relationship to get the message across... it's just not the same. =[

And I just chose to not enter my gender and it says 'they' this and that instead of he/she, so it suits me just fine.

But it should be an option still. :cake:
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#4 herpaderderderderder

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:02 PM

Facebook is a large business. They don't care about how their uses are feeling. All they care about is making money off of them in any possible way. It would be NICE if they'd allow more options like in your original post, but I don't think it's very realistic. Unless they profit somehow, it's just extra, unnecessary work for them.

#5 The Vampire Queen

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:07 PM

in the big scheme of things..i never need facebook to legitimize me



Couldn't have said it better myself.

Besides, there are plenty of other ways to make your sexuality or relationship status known on facebook.

#6 Member33070

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:07 PM

There is a petition in the works for all the social media sites, I've seen it around but can't remember where at on here...

*digs*

Found it.

AVEN topic: http://www.asexualit...ked-to-twitter/

Actual petition: http://www.petitiono...9/petition.html

#7 briliantlyfreakish

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:08 PM

in the big scheme of things..i never need facebook to legitimize me


I don't either, but, it would be nice of them to give us the option. We don't have the choice to share what we are if we don't fit into their little box of what is available.

#8 Winston Marrs

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:08 PM

Most things and people will only ever cater to the mainstream/majority. Its democracy. lol

Facebook also doesnt want to risk offending its customer base by mentioning "controversial" things such as polyamory and etc.

In short facebook and most websites do not care and probably will not ever care. *hands you a tissue*
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#9 Esoteric

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:20 PM

THANK YOU.

Social media sites in general. <_<

and gender too.
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#10 dreaming cat

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:23 PM

Google+ at least offers Gender: Other as an option.
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#11 Velveteen

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:38 PM

There's currently a petition going for Facebook to inaugurate alternative gender-options for non cis-gendered folk. Please sign it - it doesn't take a minute: http://allout.org/fa...MBf-Pe&rd=1&t=1

In my opinion, though, Facebook should just scrap the 'scroll-down options' altogether, and instead just have open boxes for you to write whatever you want in - like it does for your political and religious views. That way people with more complex, non-binary gender-identities and sexual orientations would be able to accurately describe themselves in words of their own; oh, and not to mention - the opportunity for increased visibility and understanding such a format would provide. Wishful thinking, eh? -_-
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#12 Member33070

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:46 PM

There's currently a petition going for Facebook to inaugurate alternative gender-options for non cis-gendered folk. Please sign it - it doesn't take a minute: http://allout.org/fa...MBf-Pe&rd=1&t=1

In my opinion, though, Facebook should just scrap the 'scroll-down options' altogether, and instead just have open boxes for you to write whatever you want in - like it does for your political and religious views. That way people with more complex, non-binary gender-identities and sexual orientations would be able to accurately describe themselves in words of their own; oh, and not to mention - the opportunity for increased visibility and understanding such a format would provide. Wishful thinking, eh? -_-


Thanks! There must be a few petitions running around, no matter - I'll sign all the ones I hear about!

I totally agree with your sentiments there. I think the only reason they haven't done it is because people would be confused or something (folks who don't know there's more than "straight" and "gay" out there, and more than just the gender binary). But again - visibility! Totally a great reason!

#13 Velveteen

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 07:55 PM


There's currently a petition going for Facebook to inaugurate alternative gender-options for non cis-gendered folk. Please sign it - it doesn't take a minute: http://allout.org/fa...MBf-Pe&rd=1&t=1

In my opinion, though, Facebook should just scrap the 'scroll-down options' altogether, and instead just have open boxes for you to write whatever you want in - like it does for your political and religious views. That way people with more complex, non-binary gender-identities and sexual orientations would be able to accurately describe themselves in words of their own; oh, and not to mention - the opportunity for increased visibility and understanding such a format would provide. Wishful thinking, eh? -_-


Thanks! There must be a few petitions running around, no matter - I'll sign all the ones I hear about!

I totally agree with your sentiments there. I think the only reason they haven't done it is because people would be confused or something (folks who don't know there's more than "straight" and "gay" out there, and more than just the gender binary). But again - visibility! Totally a great reason!


Yeah, you're right - they're probably just trying to 'keep things simple' - without realising that their simplicity is, in fact, another person's oppression. Thanks for signing the petition :cake: :)
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#14 abea

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 08:05 PM

Um...I have a couple of polyamorous friends who actually have 'In a polyamorous relationship with: person a, person b and person c' on their facebooks. I've never felt the need to list my gender, sexuality or relationship status on facebook, so I don't know how that all works, but I know I've seen it.
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#15 Blood Angel

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 08:13 PM

Doesn't it just have a box next to interested in male or female?

Perhaps, just don't tick any box?
But that may come across as aromantic, unless you're looking for a companion.
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#16 Member33070

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 08:29 PM

Doesn't it just have a box next to interested in male or female?

Perhaps, just don't tick any box?
But that may come across as aromantic, unless you're looking for a companion.


Yeah, exactly. If someone is heteroromantic, but asexual, for example, there's no distinction there.

Also, if someone doesn't check any boxes, nothing shows up. It doesn't say, "Interested in: Neither"...instead the entire section disappears.

#17 Raccoons & Arca N.H.

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 08:57 PM

Doesn't it just have a box next to interested in male or female?

Perhaps, just don't tick any box?
But that may come across as aromantic, unless you're looking for a companion.

I can't actually find a section that asks for sexual orientation, I'm supposing the OP was referring to the 'Interested in: Male, Female' section.

The options have always been a little slim, Gender is an issue too. I can understand that if they try and list every orientation/gender it will turn into a long list, but they could atleast have an 'Other' section.

Having said that, I never really got why it was so important to let your orientation known over FaceBook.

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#18 Member33070

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 09:13 PM

^ Some people use it like a dating site. :rolleyes: Seriously! They'll friend their friends' friends, and then ask them on dates based on their pictures before ever meeting them. I've seen it happen.

So, knowing orientation is helpful for that. :lol:

#19 Haunted Trolley

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Posted 09 August 2011 - 11:08 PM

I can remember when I was still a member of Facebook when I actually suggested it to to them via customer feedback. Apparently, nothing has happened. :(

But I fully agree. The world needs to know, because despite the fact that I didn't mark either box, people still always assumed that I was straight. I know it is the majority, but still...
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#20 mad_scientist

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 12:28 AM

The only reason for Interested In: to be there is dating, isn't it? I'm not sure it needs to be more complicated than it is.

The Gender: allows them to get pronouns right. Unless you want them to reprogram everything with a possibly endless list of pronouns (many of which don't behave the same way grammatically and won't work at all in many languages; this is an international service after all), I'm not sure what changing the gender selection will change. I left mine blank.

don't take this the wrong way, but reading your post kind of makes me want to punch you in face.


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#21 Siggy

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 12:37 AM

Facebook has four options: interested in men, women, both, or neither. However, if you say neither most people will think you just chose not to specify. In my experience, GLB people frequently won't specify. So when people don't say, it suggests queerness to me.

I think you might be able to show polyamorous relationships by creating a Friends List with the appropriate name.

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#22 Member33070

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 01:15 AM

The Gender: allows them to get pronouns right. Unless you want them to reprogram everything with a possibly endless list of pronouns (many of which don't behave the same way grammatically and won't work at all in many languages; this is an international service after all), I'm not sure what changing the gender selection will change. I left mine blank.


This is a good point, however, I don't think it would be completely out of the question to add a neutral gender, with the "xe" sorts of pronouns (or whatever is accepted as appropriate - which may be another part of the problem). Perhaps allow people to choose their pronoun (masculine, feminine, or neutral) and add a write-in field as well to clarify. The write-in field doesn't need to modify the site in any way really.

Facebook has four options: interested in men, women, both, or neither. However, if you say neither most people will think you just chose not to specify. In my experience, GLB people frequently won't specify. So when people don't say, it suggests queerness to me.

I think you might be able to show polyamorous relationships by creating a Friends List with the appropriate name.


The "neither option" shows up as nothing, though. The entire section disappears. If they had a true "neither" option that might be nice.

I would really like it if the changes end up incorporating the difference between your romantic and sexual orientation...dream come true!

#23 cinnabubbles

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 01:48 AM

Facebook needs a "Interested in: Only my girlfriend now FUCK OFF." option, but hey, you don't see me complaining.

I don't really use my FB all that much to begin with so it doesn't bother me much in the long run.

I do agree that it DOES need more options though.

#24 simplymaya

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 04:13 AM

Seriously. It should. There are more than to orientations out there. It assumes that everyone is sexual, and that they are either gay or straight. Why isn't asexual on there? Pansexual? What about people who are polyamourus? They don't allow you to state that you are in a relationship with more than one person. It might at least open a few people's eyes to the world around them if these options were available. I know I don't have all the options up here, I am just saying, maybe we need to petition facebook to change up their options in that respect.


Facebook doesn't have orientation. They have "Likes:" and you choose from Boys or Girls so this not necessarily a sexual orientation.

For me, if you feel uncomfortable stating you like such people then don't put anything at all. For example, if you don't want people to know if you are single, in a relationship, married you just don't fill anything in.

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#25 mad_scientist

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 06:11 AM

This is a good point, however, I don't think it would be completely out of the question to add a neutral gender, with the "xe" sorts of pronouns (or whatever is accepted as appropriate - which may be another part of the problem). Perhaps allow people to choose their pronoun (masculine, feminine, or neutral) and add a write-in field as well to clarify. The write-in field doesn't need to modify the site in any way really.


If you don't choose one, you're "they", the most widely accepted gender-neutral pronoun set. This is what I have it set to. However, I've heard conflicting reports on whether it's actually become compulsory to select a gender; if this is the case, it shouldn't be, or there should be a 'not specified' option. (I think 'not specified' is broader than 'neither' or 'other', given that then you'd also need 'not specified' and 'bigender/androgyne' at minimum which would all give the same pronoun set.)

don't take this the wrong way, but reading your post kind of makes me want to punch you in face.


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#26 Member33070

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 06:24 AM

^ Hmm, interesting. I don't know about at sign-up, but testing it out now to change it, it only allowed changes to "male" or "female". -_-

*sigh* I don't know.

#27 Saolin

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 07:07 AM

I just leave my relationship as "it's complicated" with no one. It works.
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#28 Tiranasta

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 08:59 AM

I don't have a Facebook account (well, technically I do, but I didn't create it and have never logged into it and the person who did create it rapidly deviated from 'accurate' information, so I don't consider myself to have one) and I would definitely support this. It would be good for visibility.
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#29 TheFallen

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 09:37 AM

I like the idea of a 'Not Interested' option and then just let people make what they want of it. I also like the idea of a 'Dislike' button, but they don't have that either.
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#30 FedoraMan

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Posted 10 August 2011 - 10:05 AM

I just leave that bit blank.
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