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The Cuddle Urge


crazysally

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thesleepydragon

I get this all the time.

Wake up most mornings feeling grumpy about it. Especially cold mornings.

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I posted in another thread and here was my response: I think it would be nice to have someone to cuddle with (*cough* use as a pillow *cough*) but I think my pillows will get jealous.

It really annoys me when I get these urges, but this usually only happens in the mornings, before bed, and when I'm feeling particularly lonely so it doesn't last very long and brush it off as nothing.

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lordsalisbury

I get this urge ALL the time, but I cannot bare the thought that the person I was going to hug (the hugee?) wouldn't want me to hug them, and they'd be thinking 'Ooo get off me'. So I never follow through on it (or hardly ever, like twice a decade or something).

One of my best friends once told me that the reason he never hugs me, although he hugs most other friends, including less close friends, is because he thinks it would make me uncomfortable. I understand why he thinks that. He lives on the other side of the world now, but he and I have worked out a 'half-hug, half-handshake' (clasp hands together as if you're about to arm-wrestle, use other free hand/arm to embrace other around the shoulders, touch torsos briefly) which we use whenever we meet up.

Tbh, hugs mean so much to me, that I remember them for years afterwards, lol. My younger sister was very huggy, and she and I don't talk anymore, and I really miss that. I love platonically affectionate people. I even have like a mental list of which of my friends have or haven't hugged me over the years. So ridiculous ;)

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I get this urge ALL the time, but I cannot bare the thought that the person I was going to hug (the hugee?) wouldn't want me to hug them, and they'd be thinking 'Ooo get off me'. So I never follow through on it (or hardly ever, like twice a decade or something).

Pretty much this. And then I go home feeling not so great. A lot of the time it seems like getting into my life someone I'm close enough to cuddle is kind of unattainable.

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I love hugging too. I hug all my family (even in public) although not one of my younger brothers (teenager = thinks guys hugging is gay) used to have loads of female friends and we would always hug to say hello and goodbye (moved away to live with ex so no longer get to see them :-( really miss the hugs and getting to spend time with them) and I love hugging someone I'm in love with I sleep so much better with someone to cuddle up to

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sexualwithasexual

I get this urge ALL the time, but I cannot bare the thought that the person I was going to hug (the hugee?) wouldn't want me to hug them, and they'd be thinking 'Ooo get off me'. So I never follow through on it (or hardly ever, like twice a decade or something).

Pretty much this. And then I go home feeling not so great. A lot of the time it seems like getting into my life someone I'm close enough to cuddle is kind of unattainable.

This is almost unbearably sad! I'm sexual, but platonic affection is highly important to me. (Maybe especially because I'm with an asexual). I think you could try and cultivate safe friends to be affectionate with. Try it! Find someone that you KNOW is not going to take it as hitting on, and just start out by touching them on the shoulder when they say something funny. Then see if they reciprocate. Over time, you'll find out which people in your circle will reciprocate. They will likely be "the one!" So then you'd be surprised how quickly they can become your huggy, touchy buddy. I use my gay male friends for this the most. Totally safe for me, a lesbian. it's really important to get touch and give that kind of touch (if you crave that).

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I like cuddling and sleeping buddies.

I had trouble with it the other week though when one of my two main sleeping buddies turned out to have a huge crush on me. :/ Had to end that. Damn shame too. Great cuddler.

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To be honest, I'm the same. I'm just lucky enough to have friends that don't mind when I jump on them and hung them randomly xD

Try hugging a teddy bear :) that works for me.

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I LOVE cuddles. Proper cuddles. Sadly, in the past few years, only 3 people, outside of my immediate family, give me such hugs. :( Two of those are an ex's parents (I'm still very good friends with thier son), and Face here (whom I only see at the too few meet-ups we're both able to attend). And family only realy give he quick hugs. No real snuggle cuddles. Not had a snuggle with anyone for the past... 3 years, I think.

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I've been getting crazy cuddle urges lately; my dorm that I just moved into yesterday was freezing cold because my roomie and I haven't messed with the AC yet, so it was on all night, but luckily my blanket is one of those big fluffy comforters so I curled up in it, so that felt nice. But I've had maybe five hugs in the past two or three months, so it's really getting to me right now. :(

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And then I also get urges to want to spoon/hug/cuddle/whatever with various friends of mine. I'm a biromantic male and it's frustrating how the social norm says that it's ok for women to be just friends and still do those mildly romantic things, but if men were to do that, they'd instantly be labeled gay and hot for each other :/

I live in the northeastern US but just returned from a week in Guatemala. My understanding of the mainstream attitudes to non-heteronormative sexuality there is that they're not very accepting, but a number of times I saw two male friends, particularly about middle-school age, walking down the street arm-in-arm, or with one resting his arm on the other's shoulder. I'm a little jealous of people who so freely express their platonic affection through physical contact.

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Brandi the Branded

I love hugs cuddles and huggles...I wish I was less akward so I could give people hugs normally..I use pillows or stuff'd animals when I wanna cuddle (which is a lot lately)

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This weekend, I am weaving my cuddle web and ensnaring my two unsuspecting friends, when they come over for a meal on saturday...yay... One of them is a regular contributor to my cuddle collection box, thus helping to stabilise and maintain my cuddleometer, ensuring that during a hug famine, if I am unable to get charitable help from 'Save the Hugs' I can avoid going hug-hungry or being mal-hugged by opening the reserve tanks of my cuddleometer.

I really do think Aven ought to organise a hugfest, but for avenites only, so we would need proper ID with our Hugshots on, then we can all throw ourselves in one big heap and make a huge cuddle muddle, and contiue until we are all hug eyed :)

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Oh! You should get a big dog. I bet big fluffy dogs are great for cuddling.

I have only had one main stay,cuddly toy, during the last six years, although my friends recently gave me a small cute, fluff ball of a Teddy...who incidently seems to be lost, at the moment.... But anyway, my main-stay cuddle toy, is in fact a big fluffy warm lovely loveable dog...YAY

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montgomeryguy

I'm a hugger, have been all my life. Fortunately, I have people in my life who are also huggers and who have no interest in going any further, so it works out well.

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Alanna's Armor

I love hugs, which is only encouraged by my friends being touchy-feely. I have a certain group of friends who I don't see very often, and after long enough away from them I start missing my huggles and counting the weeks until get engulfed in loads and loads of hugs ^_^ We have cuddle puddles, which is as many people tangled and piled on each other as possible.

And no-pressure cuddling is about my favorite thing to do with my boyfriend.

I think the cuddle/hug urge for me is about connection...being physically close to someone is proof that you're mentally close to them, too.

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I love hugs, which is only encouraged by my friends being touchy-feely. I have a certain group of friends who I don't see very often, and after long enough away from them I start missing my huggles and counting the weeks until get engulfed in loads and loads of hugs ^_^ We have cuddle puddles, which is as many people tangled and piled on each other as possible.

And no-pressure cuddling is about my favorite thing to do with my boyfriend.

I think the cuddle/hug urge for me is about connection...being physically close to someone is proof that you're mentally close to them, too.

This. I have to say, "cuddle puddles" sound fun but I'm not sure how some of my friends would take to the idea, which saddens me.

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I don't tend to want to initiate a hug, but sometimes I have this uncontrollable* urge to cuddle all about... Unfortunately, I have nobody to have on the receiving end, so it usually gets degraded to a stuffed animal... or not at all. :(

* There was That One Time where I /almost/ proved myself right, but I somehow avoided cuddling a friend around family... ... too awkward! Tiredness has yet to override common sense so far.

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

I don't tend to want to initiate a hug, but sometimes I have this uncontrollable* urge to cuddle all about... Unfortunately, I have nobody to have on the receiving end, so it usually gets degraded to a stuffed animal... or not at all. :(

Oh! :( A virtual hug for you! :)

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Wayne Turner

I feel like this during the week by come Friday I know that I will get my cuddle 'fix' and everything will be OK. I must confess that it is hard when you are alone, the longer you are alone the more you need to be held.

I am so grateful that I have a girlfriend. Although being apart during the week is especially difficult and all I want is to be held...

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Oh! :( A virtual hug for you! :)

Virtual hugs are nice... but nothing beats the real deal.

I must confess that it is hard when you are alone, the longer you are alone the more you need to be held.

True words, here...

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Oh my goodness! Lately, I've so been having cuddle cravings! It's a pretty overwhelming drive at times. I've done several Cuddle Parties, but haven't done one recently. I do enjoy cuddling with my friends and will readily cuddle with a stranger (unless there are creepy aspects to the interaction).

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I love cuddling and get the urge quite frequently. Unfortunately none of my friends or family are cuddlers so I'm stuck with pillows. <_<

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DancingThroughTheShadows

I get the cuddle urge quite a lot, I often feel like I need a hug but I dare not initiate a hug because I'm scared of being pushed away so I'm left cuddling my squishy toys at night. :(

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Guest Invisible Pumpkin

I get the cuddle urge quite a lot, I often feel like I need a hug but I dare not initiate a hug because I'm scared of being pushed away so I'm left cuddling my squishy toys at night. :(

awww Another virtual hug, this one for you!

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DancingThroughTheShadows
awww Another virtual hug' date=' this one for you! [/quote']

Aww. Thank you! *hugs Yummy back* :)

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I don't like hugging people. I mean, I don't hate it but would never initiate. I'll hug relatives if they are coming at me with intent to hug, though.

I hug my dog. I have stuffed animals. I don't really desire physical contact with people. my dog, the other hand, is damned cute and soft and fuzzy. ^_^

I know what you mean! I think if I connected with someone I would want to cuddle, but mostly I hug my dogs! They're basset hounds so they love to cuddle up next to me on the couch!

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I also get the urge to cuddle. Mostly couch cuddling and a good back massage. However, unfortunately that is always perceived as a come-on by male (who make superior cuddle buddies due to the nice flat chest in my humble opinion). A good cuddle while reading or watching a movie is a glorious thing. Same with stargazing while camping.

I'm not too huge on hugs, but they are nice every now and then (as long as they aren't too long).

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WhenSummersGone

I get this quite a bit but I don't want to cuddle with someone I'm not dating, so it kinda sucks right now

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