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What does feeling horny or turned on feel like?


Gho St Ory Qwan

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Gho St Ory Qwan

I don't even know if I've experienced it myself. Can anyone explain what how you know you're turned on? i tried asking people but they can't tell if I'm serious and just say it makes you wanna have sex. So obviously I'm not going to understand that.

Sexuals welcome too, if you're sexual let me know. I doubt there is a difference but if there is one it'd be cool to know.

This is a purely educational question so I imagine there'll be some 'TMI' warnings, but I expect that.

I hope this isn't too weird to ask but I really wanna know it's getting annoying waiting till I'm older when I doubt I'll learn anything on it on my own at this point.

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you*hear*but*do*you*listen

Ummm, do you mean physically aroused, or physically aroused by somebody while wanting sex with them? 'Cause the two are certainly different.

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Gho St Ory Qwan

Ah, thanks Chicken.

And, both if you can explain them. :unsure: I don't know because I don't know any thing about it. So I don't know the variations or anything. DX

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vrazda verlaine

I was thinking the same thing. There have been plenty of threads lately about what sexual attraction feels like, but for us nonlibidoists - what does plain arousal, no matter the cause, feel like?

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WhenSummersGone

Well besides annoying lol, arousal to me is like wanting cake or chocolate except you feel it down there and it's hard to ignore unless you take care of it. I'm able to avoid it most of the time though, pretty much how I can avoid eating sweet food

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As far as I can tell, it's just arousal of that lower region, though I can't say a lot more since it's never happened when with someone, but an idea, or imagery, or something like that can set it off and I guess you just have that desire to do something about it or ignore it. It usually goes away pretty quickly. I can't quite say how it feels when people talk about their 'needs' and getting those 'needs' met as if that is someone else's problem that they are horny. =/

But when you get that er, feeling down below (tingly, burning)...that's the indication something turned you on/that you are turned on. I suppose there are more technical definitions about it over the net, but I associate it with plain physical arousal.

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Gho St Ory Qwan

Well I know when my body wants me to masturbate but I don't feel like wanting cake or anything. It's like knowing I need to go for a waz. I don't get pleasure from pissing but I know when my body needs to.

That doesn't sound like being horny though, I don't think it does anyway. >.< A mystery.

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Well I know when my body wants me to masturbate but I don't feel like wanting cake or anything. It's like knowing I need to go for a waz. I don't get pleasure from pissing but I know when my body needs to.

That doesn't sound like being horny though, I don't think it does anyway. >.< A mystery.

Well, as far as I know, feeling physical arousal to the point of wanting to masturbate it IS feeling horny, but I have lots of sexual friends who can't understand the concept of not wanting to let someone else touch you because it's supposed to feel like a million times better (yeah, whatever, don't want to find out.) and they make it a job to voice out how sexually needy they are so someone else would take care of it.

Then, of course, is the thing you*hear*but*do*you*listen mentioned: sometimes people gets that arousal just by looking at someone else and actually desiring them. Then the body does the whole physical response. As an identified asexual I've never felt that sexual attraction towards someone else, but I get the physical response sometimes without trigger so I guess they're not related.

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Well... You know how when you're hungry but ignoring your stomach it starts contracting and being stupid? It's like that, only downstairs. And it sucks because if your muscles start contracting things get worse and more, uh, hard to ignore.

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well. in my opinion, this is one of the primary differences between asexuals with libidos and sexuals. here's my analogy...

i like a drink every now and again. (shut up, those of you who know me--i said every now and again.) but i've never understood the need people have to drink socially. as far as i'm concerned, why should i drive across town, at night, in bad weather, to a dive bar with outrageously overpriced drinks, in order to drink with other people--when i have perfectly good beer in the fridge?!

in other words, the impulse is the same; it's just what you do with it that makes the difference.

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well. in my opinion, this is one of the primary differences between asexuals with libidos and sexuals. here's my analogy...

i like a drink every now and again. (shut up, those of you who know me--i said every now and again.) but i've never understood the need people have to drink socially. as far as i'm concerned, why should i drive across town, at night, in bad weather, to a dive bar with outrageously overpriced drinks, in order to drink with other people--when i have perfectly good beer in the fridge?!

in other words, the impulse is the same; it's just what you do with it that makes the difference.

I like this analogy.

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I second the muscle contraction thing. Once that happens, it can get annoying

And TMI ahead to explain own person experiences

There is at least one part of everyday that I get horny. I am not kidding. Everyday there will be times when I get horny. It either happens when a thought crosses my mind and happens in short intervals throughout the day. It might last a few seconds. Or there will be some days where it's really bad and I'll be horny for hours. The worst is at night before I go to sleep. That's when it hits me most often. And if I don't do something to take care of it, it will most likely wake me up in the middle of the night where I have to do something about it

And when a day comes along where I don't get horny, I get a little worried wondering if I'm getting sick or I'm not mentally right

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I was wondering that too :v

I haven't heard from any of my friends after age 17 that ther horny, so I forgot about that word, thats what it is to me , just a word. Out of highschool out of mind.

Tho I knew I wasn't going to understand it, at least not really how I should. But I think 'hungry' does the trick as its a very demanding feeling and I'v had nights where I woke up around 3 just to plunder the darn fridge x_x;;;

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Gho St Ory Qwan

THAT'S horny? Wow... That's so boring. I thought it was meant to be something ... more?

It's more like... it's like when I'm cold, or hot or on the rare occassion I'm embarresed and my ears go warm. And I think, oh, it's like that again.

I sometimes wanna touch my ears to cool 'em down. But sometimes can't be bothered. Doing that annoying deed is like cooling my ears down. I don't think I'm hungry... And it doesnt help that nothing happens after wards. If I don't do anything the feeling goes. if I try doing something it prolongs it and really really pisses me off.

hmmm... I think I'm missing the pleasure side of that completely. it's never occured to me that that feeling would be something to share with others.

Matt I cant read your spoiler!

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WhenSummersGone

Well I know when my body wants me to masturbate but I don't feel like wanting cake or anything. It's like knowing I need to go for a waz. I don't get pleasure from pissing but I know when my body needs to.

That doesn't sound like being horny though, I don't think it does anyway. >.< A mystery.

Well, as far as I know, feeling physical arousal to the point of wanting to masturbate it IS feeling horny, but I have lots of sexual friends who can't understand the concept of not wanting to let someone else touch you because it's supposed to feel like a million times better (yeah, whatever, don't want to find out.) and they make it a job to voice out how sexually needy they are so someone else would take care of it.

Ya this is something I will never understand. To me pleasing myself feels a million times better than sex ever has or ever will

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Gho St Ory Qwan

I dont find it as something I could describe as 'pleasing myself' Its boring too. I dont do it anymore anyway. =/

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well. in my opinion, this is one of the primary differences between asexuals with libidos and sexuals. here's my analogy...

i like a drink every now and again. (shut up, those of you who know me--i said every now and again.) but i've never understood the need people have to drink socially. as far as i'm concerned, why should i drive across town, at night, in bad weather, to a dive bar with outrageously overpriced drinks, in order to drink with other people--when i have perfectly good beer in the fridge?!

in other words, the impulse is the same; it's just what you do with it that makes the difference.

Well, P, as well as possibly being God (see Oh the humanity thread), you are definitely the Analogy God. Disgusting though this analogy may be, and it is. :blink:

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WünderBâhr

Hmmn, the analogy would work, except for the ones who have libidos, but don't want to--ie. the ones who masturbate just to get it over with and not because they feel sexy and want to get it on with themselves. So.. I suppose for them, they'd have a sip to get the craving out of their head and then go back to juice? Wouldn't that make them sound like a bit of an addict, then? Hmmmn...

*is unsure*

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THAT'S horny? Wow... That's so boring. I thought it was meant to be something ... more?

It's more like... it's like when I'm cold, or hot or on the rare occassion I'm embarresed and my ears go warm. And I think, oh, it's like that again.

I sometimes wanna touch my ears to cool 'em down. But sometimes can't be bothered. Doing that annoying deed is like cooling my ears down. I don't think I'm hungry... And it doesnt help that nothing happens after wards. If I don't do anything the feeling goes. if I try doing something it prolongs it and really really pisses me off.

hmmm... I think I'm missing the pleasure side of that completely. it's never occured to me that that feeling would be something to share with others.

Matt I cant read your spoiler!

Is there a button that says "Show" next to the spoiler?

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Gho St Ory Qwan

Is there a button that says "Show" next to the spoiler?

Yes but it's not showing anything. =/

Hmmn, the analogy would work, except for the ones who have libidos, but don't want to--ie. the ones who masturbate just to get it over with and not because they feel sexy and want to get it on with themselves. So.. I suppose for them, they'd have a sip to get the craving out of their head and then go back to juice? Wouldn't that make them sound like a bit of an addict, then? Hmmmn...

*is unsure*

That is exactly what its like for me! >:/

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  • 3 months later...

As far as I can tell, it's just arousal of that lower region, though I can't say a lot more since it's never happened when with someone, but an idea, or imagery, or something like that can set it off and I guess you just have that desire to do something about it or ignore it. It usually goes away pretty quickly. I can't quite say how it feels when people talk about their 'needs' and getting those 'needs' met as if that is someone else's problem that they are horny. =/

But when you get that er, feeling down below (tingly, burning)...that's the indication something turned you on/that you are turned on. I suppose there are more technical definitions about it over the net, but I associate it with plain physical arousal.

Oh My God!!!! This is EXACTLY how I feel! I also never feel any sexual arousal. I thought there was something seriously wrong with me.

Cheers.

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Quill Pen Gentleman

Now that I've seen this thread I have a question. I was on the bus with this guy and he put his arm around me, and I felt a rude sensation down there. (a little TMI, I know)I didn't like it, though. It was a "someone's creeping up behind you with a knife and you can't move" type feeling. Only the feeling was down there and not on my back. That said, am I still an asexual if I expereince arousal (even though I didn't like it)? I like arousal, just not when it's down there.

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Gho St Ory Qwan

Yeah I get that sorta feeling. By what I can tell that's being horny. but yeah I get that either randomly when I'm bored or enjoying a peice of cake (oh my) or more noticably when something like that occurs and I'm uncomfortable. it's not great thinking your body is so blissfully unaware and even worse at the implication such a thing may have CAUSED it. DX

BTW, it can't be TMI when you phrased it so politely aha

Oh and yeah of course you're still asexual. That's arousal, one of the many kinds, we can't help that if we get it =[ Sexual attraction on the other hand is different I'd imagine. That feeling is least attractive to me so I could never understand it being positive or occurring from something positive myself. (When I'm eating cake it ruins the moment -.-)

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Now that I've seen this thread I have a question. I was on the bus with this guy and he put his arm around me, and I felt a rude sensation down there. (a little TMI, I know)I didn't like it, though. It was a "someone's creeping up behind you with a knife and you can't move" type feeling. Only the feeling was down there and not on my back. That said, am I still an asexual if I expereince arousal (even though I didn't like it)? I like arousal, just not when it's down there.

I see you identify as female; it may interest you to know that studies have been conducted that show women tend to get increased blood-flow to their genitalia along with increased lubrication in response to experiencing any sexual stimulus whatsoever, including the threat of sexual violence. The doctors leading the study inferred that this may be an ancient biological mechanism designed to protect us from excessive physical damage during rape (because if the vagina is dry, it is likely to tear, and prior to modern medicine, a wound meant an infection, and infection meant you were probably going to die).

So rest assured; this is a perfectly normal biological response, you needn't feel guilty or responsible for it, and it has no bearing on your orientation.

P.

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Quill Pen Gentleman

I can't get over how nice people are on this site. :) Thanks for the explainations, though I don't think the guy on the bus would rape me. He's nice and I'm sure he was unaware of how I was feeling. I'm glad that I can still say I'm asexual, after reading the responses. I know now that I don't like feeling horny.

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Now that I've seen this thread I have a question. I was on the bus with this guy and he put his arm around me, and I felt a rude sensation down there. (a little TMI, I know)I didn't like it, though. It was a "someone's creeping up behind you with a knife and you can't move" type feeling. Only the feeling was down there and not on my back. That said, am I still an asexual if I expereince arousal (even though I didn't like it)? I like arousal, just not when it's down there.

I see you identify as female; it may interest you to know that studies have been conducted that show women tend to get increased blood-flow to their genitalia along with increased lubrication in response to experiencing any sexual stimulus whatsoever, including the threat of sexual violence. The doctors leading the study inferred that this may be an ancient biological mechanism designed to protect us from excessive physical damage during rape (because if the vagina is dry, it is likely to tear, and prior to modern medicine, a wound meant an infection, and infection meant you were probably going to die).

So rest assured; this is a perfectly normal biological response, you needn't feel guilty or responsible for it, and it has no bearing on your orientation.

P.

This.....I did not know. Thanks for this.

As for the question the thread asks, the beer analogy works.

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Gho St Ory Qwan

Now that I've seen this thread I have a question. I was on the bus with this guy and he put his arm around me, and I felt a rude sensation down there. (a little TMI, I know)I didn't like it, though. It was a "someone's creeping up behind you with a knife and you can't move" type feeling. Only the feeling was down there and not on my back. That said, am I still an asexual if I expereince arousal (even though I didn't like it)? I like arousal, just not when it's down there.

I see you identify as female; it may interest you to know that studies have been conducted that show women tend to get increased blood-flow to their genitalia along with increased lubrication in response to experiencing any sexual stimulus whatsoever, including the threat of sexual violence. The doctors leading the study inferred that this may be an ancient biological mechanism designed to protect us from excessive physical damage during rape (because if the vagina is dry, it is likely to tear, and prior to modern medicine, a wound meant an infection, and infection meant you were probably going to die).

So rest assured; this is a perfectly normal biological response, you needn't feel guilty or responsible for it, and it has no bearing on your orientation.

P.

That's very helpful to know. I'm glad you shared that. =] Makes my body seem to make a lot more sense now aha. :cake:

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THAT'S horny? Wow... That's so boring. I thought it was meant to be something ... more?It's more like... it's like when I'm cold, or hot or on the rare occassion I'm embarresed and my ears go warm. And I think, oh, it's like that again.I sometimes wanna touch my ears to cool 'em down. But sometimes can't be bothered. Doing that annoying deed is like cooling my ears down. I don't think I'm hungry... And it doesnt help that nothing happens after wards. If I don't do anything the feeling goes. if I try doing something it prolongs it and really really pisses me off. hmmm... I think I'm missing the pleasure side of that completely. it's never occured to me that that feeling would be something to share with others. Matt I cant read your spoiler!

I think maybe feeling is the same, but the experience and reaction to it is different. Like, if you're asexual, the feeling is boring and/or annoying, and if you're sexual, the feeling is exciting and pleasant and makes you really look forward to doing something about it (either on your own or with another person)?

I have always thought that the many ways people feel about sex are similar to the way people feel about food (except, obviously, we all have to eat and we definitely don't all have to have sex). Some people eat because they have to, but don't really get pleasure out of it or care about what they're eating, and would probably take a 'nutrition pill' instead of eating if they could. And other people looooooove food and find it to be one of life's greatest pleasures and would never want to give it up. Same activity, different experiences.

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