Gatita Pequeña Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Welcome, Gatita Pequeña! Have some It's okay to explore and not have all the answers. Self-discovery and knowledge of oneself can be a lifelong voyage. That's not necessarily a bad thing. It might just mean one is growing and evolving over a lifetime. In other words, being alive. :) Thank you! I know not everyone has a label, I just want to figure out sometime soon what I am! @.@ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Cat Hale Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Welcome to the forums Gatita! I know its hard to be right on the brink of finding out who you are, only to be somehow- well, for a lack of better term- "cockblocked". Just remember that all good things come with time :) Don't rush into things... in 2008 I thought I was a gay male, in 2009 I accepted that I was bisexual, in 2010 I learned that I was transgendered, and in 2012 I found out about asexuality and that seemed to fit way better than my previous adventures across all the letters of LGBTA... The important thing to do is keep an open mind and never rule anything out :) If you ever need to talk, please feel free to send me a message! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 yada forum appears to be down. :( (there isn't another revolution going on in Egypt, is there?) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
5_♦♣ Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 What does Egypt have to do with the yada forum? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 Early on the host was apparently located in Egypt and the forum was offline for a little while when the Egyptian government at the time shut down internet stuff in an attempt to stifle the protests and all. Back when Mubarak was still in power, just before he wasn't. Anyway, the forum is back. I guess it was just some glitch last night. :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Oceania Posted July 20, 2012 Share Posted July 20, 2012 Ello, new yadas. Sit down, have some cake, because you know what? It's our second Yadaversary. Yadas are two years old today. Need a bit of happiness on a day like today anyways. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
S.. Posted July 20, 2012 Share Posted July 20, 2012 Really? Splendid! 2 happens to be one of my favorite numbers and 21 (or rather, the 21st) happens to be a national holiday here in Belgium, so here's some Belgian delights to go with all of the cakery today: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted July 21, 2012 Share Posted July 21, 2012 Happy yadaversary to all the yadas! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kelly Posted July 21, 2012 Share Posted July 21, 2012 Hakkaa päälle! Two OMGWTF years! That deserves rainbow petits fours and bow tie cup cakes! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Professor T. Pollution Posted July 23, 2012 Share Posted July 23, 2012 Hello all. It's good to see so many familiar names still around. Apparently I have returned 2 days after the 2nd anniversary of Yadadom; therefore... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
5_♦♣ Posted July 25, 2012 Share Posted July 25, 2012 Such pretty and delicious looking cakes. *Drools over cakes while trying not to eat them*. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Oceania Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 *Drools over cakes while trying not to eat them*. BLASPHEMY. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
5_♦♣ Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 How is trying not to eat cake blasphemy? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kelly Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 *noms cake* Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Gatita Pequeña Posted August 1, 2012 Share Posted August 1, 2012 Wow, that's a bit confusing but really interesting o.O Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Storycraft Posted August 7, 2012 Share Posted August 7, 2012 Hello everyone, I'm not a new AVENite but I'm new in this particular forum. ^^' I'm in sorta the same camp as a lot of people here (which makes sense, I suppose...) in that I'm questioning right now. I realized that I was asexual almost half a year ago, and being on AVEN a lot has led me to start scrutinizing my gender identity. I'm naturally female, and I don't really have a huge problem presenting as female in most contexts (singing and acting are the two major exceptions.) But I've never been particularly girly or tomboy-ish. These last couple of years I've been realizing that it's okay if I'm not that into jewelry, it's okay if I prefer to collared shirts and dress pants to dresses and skirts, and it's okay if I sing much more confidently when belting in the tenor range than in the higher alto range. I don't have dysphoria except occasionally with my voice, but I don't feel at all attached to my female identity, nor do I feel I would be attached to a male identity. I would absolutely love to identify as an androgynous genderqueer/transwhatever (still sorta muddled about the difference between those two things is...help?) I can see myself presenting as 100% androgynous, answering to any pronoun or gendered language, wearing a suit one day and a frilly pink top the next, and being really happy. There's a part of me that's really scared to explore such an identity too deeply, though--at least, right now--because I'm almost afraid I'm "jumping on the bandwagon," so to speak. Is wanting to identify as something other than cisgender enough to make you transwhatever? Between the fact that I've had almost no dysphoria and the fact that I'm not particularly unhappy presenting as female...I don't know. It makes me feel like I'm not really justified in questioning at all. But I think presenting as androgynous would ultimately make me happier than the presentation I'm currently operating under. Does any of this make any sense whatsoever? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tadkitty Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Hello everyone, I'm not a new AVENite but I'm new in this particular forum. ^^' I'm in sorta the same camp as a lot of people here (which makes sense, I suppose...) in that I'm questioning right now. I realized that I was asexual almost half a year ago, and being on AVEN a lot has led me to start scrutinizing my gender identity. I'm naturally female, and I don't really have a huge problem presenting as female in most contexts (singing and acting are the two major exceptions.) But I've never been particularly girly or tomboy-ish. These last couple of years I've been realizing that it's okay if I'm not that into jewelry, it's okay if I prefer to collared shirts and dress pants to dresses and skirts, and it's okay if I sing much more confidently when belting in the tenor range than in the higher alto range. I don't have dysphoria except occasionally with my voice, but I don't feel at all attached to my female identity, nor do I feel I would be attached to a male identity. I would absolutely love to identify as an androgynous genderqueer/transwhatever (still sorta muddled about the difference between those two things is...help?) I can see myself presenting as 100% androgynous, answering to any pronoun or gendered language, wearing a suit one day and a frilly pink top the next, and being really happy. There's a part of me that's really scared to explore such an identity too deeply, though--at least, right now--because I'm almost afraid I'm "jumping on the bandwagon," so to speak. Is wanting to identify as something other than cisgender enough to make you transwhatever? Between the fact that I've had almost no dysphoria and the fact that I'm not particularly unhappy presenting as female...I don't know. It makes me feel like I'm not really justified in questioning at all. But I think presenting as androgynous would ultimately make me happier than the presentation I'm currently operating under. Does any of this make any sense whatsoever? Welcome Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Does any of this make any sense whatsoever? I think so. welcome and have some ! I think it's okay to explore and question. More than okay, I think it's good and healthy. It may be you decide you are cis or trans or neither or somewhere in between or whatever. It's all good. The thing that counts, in my opinion, is being genuine and true to yourself, which takes self-knowledge. If more people thought about gender and gender roles and expectations we would all probably be better off. Best wishes! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kelly Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 Welcome, Storycraft! I agree with daveb. And note the genders of the last few posters--Questioning, nekomusume, cisyada (there you go!), and Higgs Boson. Feel free to feel at home. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kelly Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Here is a lengthy NY Times article called What’s So Bad About a Boy Who Wants to Wear a Dress?. It is about gender-variant kids. Many parents and clinicians now reject corrective therapy, making this the first generation to allow boys to openly play and dress (to varying degrees) in ways previously restricted to girls — to exist in what one psychologist called “that middle space” between traditional boyhood and traditional girlhood... Transgender advocates and sympathetic clinicians argue that telling children in that middle space to abolish their cross-gender interests makes them more distressed, not less. There is also little to no evidence that therapeutic interventions change the trajectory of a child’s gender identification or sexual orientation. Clinicians who oppose traditional treatments contend that significant gender nonconformity is akin to left-handness: unusual but not unnatural. Rather than urging children to conform, they teach them how to respond to intolerance. They encourage parents to accept their children’s gender expression, especially because studies show that parental support helps to inoculate gender-atypical children against ostracism and deflated self-esteem... “A lot of parents don’t even go to clinicians anymore. They go to Web sites and listservs, which influence how they think about gender. More parents decide that making their child conform to a gender will damage his self-esteem, and I’d agree. I would argue it’s not even ethical to say to a child, ‘This is the gender you must be.’ ” Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Good article. This part got me especially: He looked at me as if I were daft. “Because I want to be who I am!” Quote Link to post Share on other sites
5_♦♣ Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 What does daft mean? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted August 11, 2012 Share Posted August 11, 2012 silly, foolish, stupid, or even mad (as in crazy) :) Seems like it's usually meant a bit tongue in cheek or at least not meant to be taken too seriously. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kitten Koder Posted August 27, 2012 Share Posted August 27, 2012 That comic is far too close to reality. :lol: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted August 28, 2012 Share Posted August 28, 2012 Welcome to the thread, Kitten Koder! Have some That comic reminds me of a question someone (tongue in cheek) asked me on another thread recently. I'm not a crossdresser, I'm a happydresser. :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
5_♦♣ Posted August 29, 2012 Share Posted August 29, 2012 A happy dresser? You mean like, you're happy when you get dressed? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
daveb Posted August 30, 2012 Share Posted August 30, 2012 A happy dresser? You mean like, you're happy when you get dressed? yep :D :lol: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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