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anyone get bored/annoyed with people quickly?


Sikanda

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Ok does anyone else have the same problem as me? I am not a great socializer never have been I used to very shy...(although working retail for the past four yrs so that has helped me out quite a bit!!)! but even when I TRY to make friends I try to connect with people there is well...nothing...And even if I like someone and consider them a friend I can only stand their company for a few hours at most before they either bore me or start annoying the heck outta me...not to mention people DRAIN me and even if I am around people I like I still need to go home after a bit and be by myself and RECHARGE heck even take a nap lol I don't know why? This goes for family too!

There are only two people I can stand to be around for an extended period of time w/out feeling like I am seriously being smothered by them lol...

one is my guy friend I have a bit of a crush on I love being around him unfortunantly don't get to be enough! He fascinates me!

the other is my best friend since middle school she is awesome like my sister but she occasionally annoys me as well...

So I dunno I feel this total disconnect from people even those I love...The human race as a whole annoys me lol...I dunno how to change this I would LOVE to go out and make friends and be more social but even when I try to be interested I just can't....can't stay interested...same with trying to find a bf/gf...I mean maybe I just have a seriously short attention span or something lol its hard to explain? I just wondered if anyone else could relate!?!?!?

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Tyger Songbird

Yeah, I totally understand that. I go through the same thing.

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Yep, I'm the same. Apparently it's something to do with being extremely introverted, and apparently there's not much that can be done about it because it's to do with the way your brain works... or something. That could just all be fudgey internet blab though.

I get sick of people really fast, unless they're talking about something interesting, but that doesn't last long. It actually causes problems for me, I have chronic fatigue syndrome, which limits my job opportunities by heaps because I'm buggered all the time. Then add on to all that the draining feeling when people are around me. Plus most of the jobs around here are for over the counter work, I'm a little bit screwed at the moment. Luckily my case manager has a similar condition so she understands that I shouldn't be in an environment that drains my energy. I wonder how well that will go. Computers all the way!

I just avoid people constantly. I keep getting told "we should catch up" but hey I'm.... busy... sick, tired, have an appointment, can't make it. They have other friends, go annoy them!

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bitterforsweet

I have a very difficult time connecting with people and become easliy annoyed, or begin to feel like I can't fit in. It's not a new thing and while some of it has to do with asexuality and sobriety, I know a lot of it has to do with my ability to isolate myself from others and how I did that for such a long time as a child and teenager that I'm not really sure how to engage with people anymore.

Granted, people really just irritate me most of the time. But I see this as a good thing because when I meet someone I can connect with well I really value them and my relationship with them.

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paperscarecrow

I'm like that too. The people I work with especially annoy me. I usually try to have a song going in my head so I can tune them out.

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Guest member31022

Totally know that feeling...basically, whats worked for me is two things:

1) Interesting people. Sounds obviously, but my current group of friends includes:

- Boy studying Anglo-Saxon, Norse and Celtic studies who quotes geek stuff all the time, reads webcomics and writes fantasy.

- RPG-playing boy, who is eccentric, waist-coat clad thesp with a tendency towards being a massive attentionwhore (also gets bored of people easily)

- Scientist, eccentric, steampunk guy who makes things like goggles or sciencey stuff (also gets bored of people easily)

- Introvert boy, engineer, has built a trebuchet and an extendable hand, makes chainmail and juggles.

- Nerd girl with a love of the interwebs, geekdom and studies maths.

I can stick around these five far long than the others, because of the fact they all fasincate me.

Basically, go for the eccentrics! They will keep you amused far longer!

2) Have a variety of different groups. In college I had three separate groups of friends who would hang out in different places. So I'd spend first break with one, second with another and lunch with another (and alternate which ones when). This means you won't get bored because you're consistently changing. Also, you don't need to be 'friends' with everyone in the group, just some, for this to work :)

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Herr Joseph von Löthing

Totally know that feeling...basically, whats worked for me is two things:

1) Interesting people. Sounds obviously, but my current group of friends includes:

- Boy studying Anglo-Saxon, Norse and Celtic studies who quotes geek stuff all the time, reads webcomics and writes fantasy.

- RPG-playing boy, who is eccentric, waist-coat clad thesp with a tendency towards being a massive attentionwhore (also gets bored of people easily)

- Scientist, eccentric, steampunk guy who makes things like goggles or sciencey stuff (also gets bored of people easily)

- Introvert boy, engineer, has built a trebuchet and an extendable hand, makes chainmail and juggles.

- Nerd girl with a love of the interwebs, geekdom and studies maths.

I can stick around these five far long than the others, because of the fact they all fasincate me.

Basically, go for the eccentrics! They will keep you amused far longer!

I need more friends like yours.

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not to mention people DRAIN me and even if I am around people I like I still need to go home after a bit and be by myself and RECHARGE heck even take a nap lol I don't know why?

I can totally relate!!! Especially to that one that I quoted - socializing drains me big time! If I'm, say, visiting someone in an other city for a few days and have to socialize all the time, I'll be sooo exhausted afterwards that I don't wanna see anyone in a week! When I 'm socially drained, I even feel infuriated to the whole human kind for "disturbing me all the time", and even hearing the sound of an incoming SMS (not to mention the doorbell!!!) makes me very annoyed. "Recharge" describes perfectly the thing that I have to go through every time when I've been around people. That's why I'm such a loner of free choice, but just like you, I'd love to get more friends and socialize more, if I only could handle it :wacko:

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Alan Degas

Same thing here. Spending time with people drains me of energy and I need to spend time alone afterward and sort of shut off my brain, usually by going online or by playing some video game. There are exceptions tho'. I find the people that don't drain me, are people who aren't afraid of silence. I can't stand it when people have the idea that you have to talk all the time and if there is a pause in the conversation they immediately go "Soo... what else is new?". Chill people, a moment of sitting together not saying anything is not taboo and it's not going to harm you, ok.

At work there are some people who annoy me too. And I feel so guilty that they do, because honestly they are all awesome people and I really do like them. But I can't help it! This one lady's laugh drives me up the wall!! >_<

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I can't stand it when people have the idea that you have to talk all the time and if there is a pause in the conversation they immediately go "Soo... what else is new?". Chill people, a moment of sitting together not saying anything is not taboo and it's not going to harm you, ok.

This! Exactly!

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Wow, i'm the same almost word for word. People, esp family, just put me on edge and for the most part just bore me. It's nothing to do with them, it's me, I just dont connect, and if I do it doesn't tend to last too long. Which kinda sucks

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Guest fridayoak

Yeah most people bore or annoy me pretty easily I'd say. I used put up with it unless they were on the extreme side but then just stopped caring and said I'd only be friends with a few select people. It's good in a way cos you appreciate the people you can bond with, but I guess there's just not many of them and if those friendships are ended for some reason then it makes it harder to deal with.

Currently my best mate is living in Japan (though he'll be back in a bit), another in Edinburgh and I have 2 in Shef (one is my flatmate, who'll be leaving in a few months) and there's been a few others over the years but not many. I think I'm only close to these people because in many ways they're very similar to me personality wise, so the whole "have different types of friends" doesn't really fit for me, (I think I only get on with my near-clones (though they're not ace)). I've also been good friends with people who weren't particularly sexual for whatever reason, but I guess this was because it made me comfortable, they didn't neccesary share other pesonality characteristics with me.

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Herr Joseph von Löthing

I think most people feel like this... If you have lots of interests, other people can seem a little boring or to not have much to talk about. Maybe it even works the other way, when everyone else has different interests to your narrow range, and you have little in common with them.

Life I guess.

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TheLuckiestDuck

The people I like (my mom, my best friend) I want to be around ALL THE TIME. Other than them, I lose patience (mostly with the constant chatter people feel the need to engage in) and don't really want to be around anyone.

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Maybe it even works the other way, when everyone else has different interests to your narrow range, and you have little in common with them.

That sounds like me :lol: I have a narrow range of interests and even they are pretty unusual... Anyway, I don't agree with that one, that everyone would be like this. Some people seem to be able to socialize almost all day long. And yes, most people get drained at some point, but not that quickly and that badly as I and some others who wrote here... I mean, that I really really can't handle being around people except a like 1-2 times a week (and even then just for a few hours, a whole day would drains me too much). The only exceptions are my mum and my best friend, with whom I could spend a lot of time without getting tired (but finally I need a break even from them).

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Herr Joseph von Löthing

Maybe it even works the other way, when everyone else has different interests to your narrow range, and you have little in common with them.

That sounds like me :lol: I have a narrow range of interests and even they are pretty unusual... Anyway, I don't agree with that one, that everyone would be like this. Some people seem to be able to socialize almost all day long. And yes, most people get drained at some point, but not that quickly and that badly as I and some others who wrote here... I mean, that I really really can't handle being around people except a like 1-2 times a week (and even then just for a few hours, a whole day would drains me too much). The only exceptions are my mum and my best friend, with whom I could spend a lot of time without getting tired (but finally I need a break even from them).

I think some people are just born socialisers, some born loners (sorry if this is offensive, I can't think of a better term right now), and some in between. Also, some people are quite overpowering. Some of my more annoying friends I just can't cope with...

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Changed773

I get super annoyed by people easily. When it comes to dating, I'm instantly annoyed with the relationship and find faults in everything.

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I think some people are just born socialisers, some born loners (sorry if this is offensive, I can't think of a better term right now), and some in between. Also, some people are quite overpowering. Some of my more annoying friends I just can't cope with...

No, it's not offensive at all, I even call myself a loner :P

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RandomDent

I know what you mean. My friends are absolutely perfect, but if I don't get my me time - heads will roll. Luckily they know this and don't take offense. I love you guys! <3

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Maybe it even works the other way, when everyone else has different interests to your narrow range, and you have little in common with them.

That sounds like me :lol: I have a narrow range of interests and even they are pretty unusual... Anyway, I don't agree with that one, that everyone would be like this. Some people seem to be able to socialize almost all day long. And yes, most people get drained at some point, but not that quickly and that badly as I and some others who wrote here... I mean, that I really really can't handle being around people except a like 1-2 times a week (and even then just for a few hours, a whole day would drains me too much). The only exceptions are my mum and my best friend, with whom I could spend a lot of time without getting tired (but finally I need a break even from them).

I think some people are just born socialisers, some born loners (sorry if this is offensive, I can't think of a better term right now), and some in between. Also, some people are quite overpowering. Some of my more annoying friends I just can't cope with...

No offense I know I am a loner...been that way my whole life lol...

Its just as lindi points out though its how quickly and easily we get drained being around people...its like everyone is psychic vampires or something or maybe its because we use to much of our energy TRYING to be interested because we feel we should...when we really just want to go home curl up on the couch by ourselves, watch tv , play violent video games, read a good book whatever...I work retail and that is VERY draining I am ALWAYS tired...I don't remember the last time I've actually woke up feeling refreshed lol and if I do wake up feeling ok well going to work and being around people quickly gets rid of any good feeling I have!(some advice for everyone out there don't work retail :) ) although I do really like my job...it also bores me but is easy and I do like it...mostly...

Days off as well I'll wake up feeling somewhat chirper and rested and then I go out for awhile(usually to the mall and to do errands and I'll be out a few hours and all of a sudden it will just hit me this OVERWHELMING tiredness...its hard to explain....

I just wish I knew how to change that but whatever part of my brain responsible for being interested in people and connecting with them or whatever else is responsible for that just isn't there...I don't need a lot of friends but I really wish I could figure out how to stop feeling so drained when I try to be interested!!!

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I'm the same way. There are two people who are in my art class every Saturday, who annoy the fuck out of me. They're okay people, really, but they just annoy me and I don't really consider them "friends," just acquaintances. I don't intentionally seek a situation where I'd be talking to people, even ones I like. There's a person that I like, who's in my political science class - I don't message him or talk to him or anything, except when we're in the class.

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Guest Viinasu

maybe a lot of people on here have schizoid personality disorder or asperger's? i have schizoid personality disorder.

symptoms of spd....

1. neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family

2. almost always chooses solitary activities

3. has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person

4. takes pleasure in few, if any, activities

5. lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives

6. appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others

7. shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affect

yeah.... i hardly ever get mad, but i like being alone a LOT! and being asexual is a symptom of it..... i like hanging out with other people, but a little social time goes a loooooooooooong way!

a lot of really introverted people have asperger's too.... maybe we all have something like that? XD

i do get pretty pissed when people ask me out though.... i try to act nice, but it really makes me mad.... and i worry a lot about whether or not someone likes me or not.... like, one of those people who thinks everyone is in love with them, only it's a bad thing for me! i'm always on the defensive with romantic stuff, i wish everyone was asexual sometimes.... O_O

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Herr Joseph von Löthing

maybe a lot of people on here have schizoid personality disorder or asperger's? i have schizoid personality disorder.

symptoms of spd....

1. neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family

2. almost always chooses solitary activities

3. has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person

4. takes pleasure in few, if any, activities

5. lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives

6. appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others

7. shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affect

yeah.... i hardly ever get mad, but i like being alone a LOT! and being asexual is a symptom of it..... i like hanging out with other people, but a little social time goes a loooooooooooong way!

a lot of really introverted people have asperger's too.... maybe we all have something like that? XD

i do get pretty pissed when people ask me out though.... i try to act nice, but it really makes me mad.... and i worry a lot about whether or not someone likes me or not.... like, one of those people who thinks everyone is in love with them, only it's a bad thing for me! i'm always on the defensive with romantic stuff, i wish everyone was asexual sometimes.... O_O

Holy crap, that's me! Still, I'm aspie, and a lot of those symptoms match up.

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Ok I also have been diagnosed with depression...which of course on of the symptoms/signs of depression is not be interested in anything/anyone and of course feeling tired all the time etc...

But to be honest a lot of my depression comes feeling alone and not feeling like I belong anywhere...I've always wondered why I don't quite fit in why I am so different...

Finding this site has helped quite a bit actually knowing that there are people like me and I don't have to pretend to be something I am not and don't have to pretend to desire something I don't...basically I am free to be myself...there isn't anything wrong with being alone...Its made me question a lot about myself and everyone around me...

I still feel a little bummed sure but not quite to the extent that I have been the last couple months...I have been debating on whether I should even continue breathing at times I have even cried myself to sleep...But now I feel a little better...:) :) :)

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maybe a lot of people on here have schizoid personality disorder or asperger's? i have schizoid personality disorder.

symptoms of spd....

1. neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family

2. almost always chooses solitary activities

3. has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person

4. takes pleasure in few, if any, activities

5. lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives

6. appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others

7. shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affect

yeah.... i hardly ever get mad, but i like being alone a LOT! and being asexual is a symptom of it..... i like hanging out with other people, but a little social time goes a loooooooooooong way!

a lot of really introverted people have asperger's too.... maybe we all have something like that? XD

i do get pretty pissed when people ask me out though.... i try to act nice, but it really makes me mad.... and i worry a lot about whether or not someone likes me or not.... like, one of those people who thinks everyone is in love with them, only it's a bad thing for me! i'm always on the defensive with romantic stuff, i wish everyone was asexual sometimes.... O_O

Holy crap, that's me! Still, I'm aspie, and a lot of those symptoms match up.

Yeah 1-4 fit me pretty well...of course three is a given lol

4 is also a indicator of depression which I have been diagnosed with...same for social anxiety which I have also been diagnosed with...

although really who friggin cares if I don't like being around people? lol

5 fits a little...

6-7 don't fit me very well at all...

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maybe a lot of people on here have schizoid personality disorder or asperger's? i have schizoid personality disorder.

symptoms of spd....

1. neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family

2. almost always chooses solitary activities

3. has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person

4. takes pleasure in few, if any, activities

5. lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives

6. appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others

7. shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affect

yeah.... i hardly ever get mad, but i like being alone a LOT! and being asexual is a symptom of it..... i like hanging out with other people, but a little social time goes a loooooooooooong way!

a lot of really introverted people have asperger's too.... maybe we all have something like that? XD

i do get pretty pissed when people ask me out though.... i try to act nice, but it really makes me mad.... and i worry a lot about whether or not someone likes me or not.... like, one of those people who thinks everyone is in love with them, only it's a bad thing for me! i'm always on the defensive with romantic stuff, i wish everyone was asexual sometimes.... O_O

1. I can't say I enjoy being around my parents, and I don't like having really close relationships, but sometimes I desire such a close relationship. Like a very close friend, or something. Eh.

2. Not sure. Sometimes I like group projects in school, but only when it's a subject that doesn't interest me, that requires a lot of research. Sometimes being unable to fulfill my grand vision for such a project annoys me. Most of the time though, I like doing things alone, like reading.

3. Yep.

4. Yep. I get bored easily, with things like reading or playing video games.

5. Yep.

6. Not sure.

7. My response to my mother when my aunt died was an insensitive sounding "Aww." So yeah.

It should be remembered that at one time, homosexuality was classified as a mental disorder by the APA. Schizoid Personality Disorder and Asperger's seem to me to just be different ways in which the brain functions. These are things that shouldn't be fixed, for the sake of being "normal" or "fitting in."

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1. neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family

2. almost always chooses solitary activities

3. has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person

4. takes pleasure in few, if any, activities

5. lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives

6. appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others

7. shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affect

Hmm, I guess I'm something like semi-schizoid... 'cause some of those things don't really apply to me, even if most of them do...

1. I do need and enjoy 1-2 close friends...

2. Yep

3. Totally

4. True...

5. for the moment, yes (but I used to be like sisters with my best friend)

6. Yes, I couldn't care less

7. Depends? Maybe quite often...

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Depends on the person. If I have to LIVE with people I tend to become annoyed with them far faster than I would just hanging out for a bit every day for a while.

If they're just annoying then..Well yeah, I will get annoyed quickly.

As for boredom, I tend to worry that I'm boring other people more than feeling bored by them. Unless they ramble on and on and ON about things that I honestly do not care about. Which a lot of my closest friends actually tend to do. -_-

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