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Does cross-dressing mean your gay?


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#1 Kasayk

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:15 AM

The thing that is kinda confusing me, is that he has a girlfriend. And ive always heard crossdressing is related to being gay. I've seen them together, and it doen't look like hes faking being in love with her. He just says that he feel more comfortable wearing girls cloths (in private appearently). Anyways so my stupid question to you guys is, even if he has a GF, is he still gay?

(edit) Actually, this story was just made up. At the time I posted this, I was just to chicken to actually come out and say that I cross-dress. But thanks for all your great responces.

Edited by Kasayk, 22 April 2010 - 12:39 AM.


#2 The MoUsY spell-checker

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:30 AM

No, what one likes to wear and to which gender(s) one is attracted are separate things.
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#3 Percy McKean

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:31 AM

Nope. Cross-dressing in and of itself is no indicator of sexuality.
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#4 50 Cent Piece

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:32 AM

Wow, what the fuck. No, dressing like the other gender does not mean you are attacting to the same gender. I don't even understand why you would think that?

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#5 Kasayk

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:33 AM

Wow, what the fuck. No, dressing like the other gender does not mean you are attacting to the same gender. I don't even understand why you would think that?

-Asexual crossdresser


WOW no need to get pissy, thats why I said it was a stupid question.

#6 killjoy188

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:35 AM

In my Abnormal Psych class the prof told us straight men like to cross dress because women's clothes turn them on, because they are attracted to women. Kinda strange, but logical at the same time.

#7 50 Cent Piece

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:38 AM

In my Abnormal Psych class the prof told us straight men like to cross dress because women's clothes turn them on, because they are attracted to women. Kinda strange, but logical at the same time.


Transvestic fetishism is when you are aroused by dressing as the opposite gender. I've met plenty of folks who just enjoy in a non erotic sense.

#8 Kasayk

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:40 AM


In my Abnormal Psych class the prof told us straight men like to cross dress because women's clothes turn them on, because they are attracted to women. Kinda strange, but logical at the same time.


Transvestic fetishism is when you are aroused by dressing as the opposite gender. I've met plenty of folks who just enjoy in a non erotic sense.


So then I should pretty much delete this topic at this point!?

#9 the_unstable

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 03:46 AM

Sounds like good fun to me.
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#10 daveb

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 04:28 AM

Nope, it has nothing to do with sexual orientation. That's a big myth perpetuated by the media and ignorance. It's good that you are asking though. Many people wouldn't bother to ask and just persist in a mistaken belief. :)
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#11 geek-in-a-half-shell

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 05:12 AM

I dress up like a dude. Cross-dressing just means that people like to dress up in a way not according to their gender because it's comfortable for them. To me, I don't like tight jeans, skirts, shorts, lacy bras and the like. I just don't feel right in those like I do wearing a button-up shirt, a tie and a vedora...
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#12 Display

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 05:38 AM

No. A lot of gay people like to cross-dress but cross-dressing doesn't make you gay.

#13 Sally

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 05:47 AM

In my Abnormal Psych class the prof told us straight men like to cross dress because women's clothes turn them on, because they are attracted to women. Kinda strange, but logical at the same time.


I think your prof is more likely kinda strange. He/she shouldn't be teaching abnormal psych dealing out stereotypes like that to students.

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#14 mindsword

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 05:54 AM

Keep the topic. Its a good question that really does need to be asked sometimes. Not everyone knows it, so its important to get people to answer.
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#15 prettyeyes

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 06:41 AM

Well, I basically identify as male and if I ever transition I will still continue to wear some women's clothing because it's just plain fun to wear. Female casual clothing, is usually fancier than men's casual clothing for example and I like to be dressed up.

#16 98slbrookes98

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 06:52 AM

Cross dressing doesn't necessarily mean you are gay.
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#17 mindlife

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 04:43 PM

There are many cross-dressers who are straight or otherwise not homosexual. Sexual orientation is separate from gendered behavior.
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#18 Frontier_Rhesus

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 06:51 PM

Your friend may be wearing a dress, but he still pulls his panties on one leg at a time if you know what I mean

#19 TheAnxiousWriter

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Posted 17 April 2010 - 09:32 PM

No, it doesn't mean anyone is gay. (though, gay people can cross-dress, too) :) I love to occasionally dress like a guy, especially for Halloween! I love it when men can pull off being female and women can dress like adorably cute guys. Research Ed Wood. He was a famous straight movie director who felt very comfortable in women's clothing.
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#20 gulmatan

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Posted 21 April 2010 - 08:37 PM

Hello there,

As a M-F transgender (transwoman, actually) myself I have lifelong experience which may help.

When I first crossdressed at age 13, I knew that I was not gay but rather, would feel more myself because I felt that expressing myself in the feminine was much more a natural state for me. All through puberty, I felt more comfortable in the feminine and expressing myself as female rather than my birth sex of male and my expected gender of masculinity. At no time did I ever feel sexually attracted to men. In my heart and mind, I knew that while I was NOT gay and just desired to express myself in the feminine gender as well as wear women's apparel.

During my 20s, I learned, through combating some off-base psychotherapy, who I was in my sexuality and my gender. The therapy I went through, although, ill-directed, caused me to go solo in building my own reinforcement and assurance of who I was--affectional, perhaps bi-affectional with NO interest for sex, along with a natural affinity for the feminine in gender expression AND presentation. AND I had no desire or attraction to or for intercourse.

Later, in my 30s, I discovered foundations and groups like the Waltham, MA organisation, IFGE (International Foundation for Gender Education) and Tri-Ess-a nationwide support group for male crossdressers. With the help of both Tri-Ess and, especially the IFGE, I learned an encyclopedia's worth about the whole transgender spectrum--from asexuals to transsexuals. Just as well, I learned the distinction between sexual orientation and gender expression.

Although, there are those who use crossdressing to facilitate a sexual fetish to achieve erections or, to reach climax, fully ejaculate or achieve orgasm. These folks are either fetishists or, transvestic fetishists. These fetishes and masturbatory uses of crossdressing are not what I am addressing. Rather, from all the above info, which I've learned about gender identity and gender expression, I would like to tell you, that crossdressing is a form of gender identity or gender expression and not a marker of sexual orientation.

Hope that helps.

#21 killjoy188

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Posted 21 April 2010 - 10:18 PM


In my Abnormal Psych class the prof told us straight men like to cross dress because women's clothes turn them on, because they are attracted to women. Kinda strange, but logical at the same time.


I think your prof is more likely kinda strange. He/she shouldn't be teaching abnormal psych dealing out stereotypes like that to students.

But what other reason is there for straight men to dress in traditionally female clothing? I don't understand...

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Posted 21 April 2010 - 11:14 PM

[edit]

#23 gulmatan

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Posted 21 April 2010 - 11:27 PM



In my Abnormal Psych class the prof told us straight men like to cross dress because women's clothes turn them on, because they are attracted to women. Kinda strange, but logical at the same time.


I think your prof is more likely kinda strange. He/she shouldn't be teaching abnormal psych dealing out stereotypes like that to students.

But what other reason is there for straight men to dress in traditionally female clothing? I don't understand...


To answer that question, you may wish to see my post above. Perhaps that will help you understand what compels straight males to dress in women's clothes.

#24 Display

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Posted 21 April 2010 - 11:40 PM

But what other reason is there for straight men to dress in traditionally female clothing? I don't understand...


Cross-dressing can be and is often an identity in and of itself. It doesn't need a reason and doesn't need to be connected to a sexuality or gender identity.

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#25 killjoy188

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Posted 22 April 2010 - 12:24 AM



But what other reason is there for straight men to dress in traditionally female clothing? I don't understand...


To answer that question, you may wish to see my post above. Perhaps that will help you understand what compels straight males to dress in women's clothes.

But as a M to F transexual you are most definitely not a man...
But like Nika said, crossdressing being an identity in and of itself, I had never heard of it said that way, thanks.

#26 gulmatan

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Posted 22 April 2010 - 12:31 AM




But what other reason is there for straight men to dress in traditionally female clothing? I don't understand...


To answer that question, you may wish to see my post above. Perhaps that will help you understand what compels straight males to dress in women's clothes.

But as a M to F transexual you are most definitely not a man...
But like Nika said, crossdressing being an identity in and of itself, I had never heard of it said that way, thanks.

True! But, there are those transsexuals or transgenderists for whom, sexual preference is a non-issue or they can opt to change (or not) their sexual preference after transition.

#27 Display

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Posted 22 April 2010 - 02:14 AM





But what other reason is there for straight men to dress in traditionally female clothing? I don't understand...


To answer that question, you may wish to see my post above. Perhaps that will help you understand what compels straight males to dress in women's clothes.

But as a M to F transexual you are most definitely not a man...
But like Nika said, crossdressing being an identity in and of itself, I had never heard of it said that way, thanks.

True! But, there are those transsexuals or transgenderists for whom, sexual preference is a non-issue or they can opt to change (or not) their sexual preference after transition.


Of course. I'm FTM myself. And I used to crossdress all the time as a kid, and now I realize I'm trans. I'm just saying not all cross-dressers are trans or gay or queer in a way beyond their cross-dressing, although that, too, can obviously be the case. In other words, everything's possible.

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#28 Pipe

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Posted 22 April 2010 - 03:56 AM

Most transvestites are heterosexual men. xB

Although... one could argue that 99% of women crossdress daily.

I for one would love to wear a suit and tie. xB

#29 Werekitten

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Posted 22 April 2010 - 08:45 PM

I for one would love to wear a suit and tie. xB


Amen, sister! Gosh darn boobs get in the way though *huffs*

As for the topic at hand... well, I think plenty of people have already cleared that up :P
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#30 gulmatan

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Posted 22 April 2010 - 09:11 PM


I for one would love to wear a suit and tie. xB


Amen, sister! Gosh darn boobs get in the way though *huffs*

As for the topic at hand... well, I think plenty of people have already cleared that up :P

What about some of the pant suits or skirt suits which Anne Klein, Jones New York or other designers are creating?




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