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Periods and being feminine.


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#31 henshin

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Posted 22 September 2009 - 04:24 PM

My periods are light, but I still would happily ditch them. I know there are women who love their periods because it proves there feminine, because obviously having a vagina wasn't enough. :rolleyes:

Really, I think its foolish to define one's gender on a few physical characteristics alone. And while I don't want to hate on the women that love their periods or anything, I seriously have to wonder why vaginal bleeding should be so glorified, and not say, runny noses.

I don't find periods to be impure, just obnoxious. I hate periods for the same and precise reason I hate explosive diarrhea and snot running down my face--I hate having uncontrollable body fluids. I don't like the sensation of constantly leaking. Why we should sing the praises of vaginal bleeding, and yet slather on deodorant to stop the equally natural function of sweating is beyond me. It strikes me as hypocritical. So long as both sexes share the same annoying body leakages, its okay to try and get rid of it. However, if it only happens to one gender, this leakage is then supposed to be treasured and revered. <_<


There is definitely a distinction to be made here between periods making you feel feminine and periods making you feel like your biological sex. I am not a feminine person and periods don't make me feel feminine, its not even about fertility becase I don't want children. Its more just about experiencing your body. Yeah vaginal bleeding isn't like OMG the specialist thing in the world, but its has more impact on your life than a snotty nose. Not to mention the fact that excessive snot and explosive diarrhea are usually symptoms of something going wrong in your body and not the natural order of things.

I also don't use deodorant or shave my legs or anything either because I really do think the human body is kinda cool the way it is.

And also, I don't think sharing a specific 'body leakage' with a certain group of people can just be sniffed at, it can engender real feelings of sisterhood, support, empathy, and solidarity. Why is that wrong? I have yet to meet anyone that actually reveres menstruation, but even if they did I don't get why it would annoy you. Surely thats better than being ashamed of it and feeling dirty?

#32 kourion

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Posted 14 September 2010 - 12:35 PM

I hate my period. I have to take painkillers just to be able to stand up for a full 36 hours. Plus I get bloated really bad, plus the pointless depression (and sometimes short fuse) that comes along with it.

Ender...hear, hear!

I reign it in quite well, my moodiness, save for my family (if you are silly enough to bug me when I look growly enough to be a bear, that's your own fault, me thinks!). But yeah, I would say this about periods

+they are messy, and by and large I hate messy events
+they hurt. WHO would like something that hurt?
+I always feel depressed, sometimes very teary and upset, and quick to anger
+they make me naseous. I have vomited from the pain/ nausea of having my period more than a handful of times.
+I often go chalk-white. And then I worry that the whole world knows.

On the plus side, I tell myself:

+unlike my bleeding ulcer, this bleeding stops in x number of days
+getting one usually means my bones are protected a bit more...
+it's a great excuse to eat some vegan chocolate for breakfast, or lunch or dinner ;)

Periods aside, I feel very much like I was meant to be a female. I LIKE being a girl. I just don't like this one aspect of being a girl. But extra strength midol sometimes helps me ignore that aspect well enough to take the sting out of it....

And did I mention the vegan chocolate? ;)

For the record, I think the hardest thing about periods was informing my mother, when I was 12 (namely because I was SO ashamed back then and didn't want to have to go to the drug store to get products). So yeah, all things considered, I'm dealing with it much better now than then...

And was I the only one who sort of lived in this stage of perpetual fear from about 10 onwards....knowing, knowing...that sooner or later the dreaded 'it' would come and I'd probably have to end up telling my parent? Not that I didn't trust her, but damn it...I was an easily embarassed kid! Well into high school, too.... I recall staying over at my uncle's one night, and my cousin asked if she could steal a tampon. I probably looked like a cherry tomato while I mummbled something about not having any (which was true). My cousins were so....open about stuff like that. They'd even talk about it in front of their Dad, and I'd just squirm, totally red in the face, and make excuses to leave.
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#33 geebowie

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Posted 18 September 2010 - 05:46 AM

I hate my period when I was younger I would get really sick each time I get it. so now I only get ever three months.anyhow even though I am genderqueer i don't really hate getting causes it makes me feel like a girl I just hate all the crap that comes with it.

#34 ExeCUTE

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Posted 18 September 2010 - 10:01 AM

I'm only a teenager, and I haven't been menstruating long- I've been quite scrawny for ages and apparently my body has only recently-ish decided that I can support a baby. but I'm already biding my time for when it's socially acceptable to take the pill or whatever it is that will free me from them.
Spoiler

Ack, I feel moany for posting this rant when I haven't had to endure them for as long as most of you... :wacko:

I don't think I feel dirty because of societal pressures and the collective "EWWWWW" that people seem to utter when it's mention, and I don't glorify them either (ugh, no. If you are happy with your period, lucky you. But that is not me.)- but I do kind of feel dirty because to me, constantly bleeding is unsanitary. But it's the same if it's constantly coming off a skinned knee. It's just... You're leaking bodily fluids. Runny noses are icky too, and so is drooling, because you're leaking.

On the subject of being feminine, I can only think of the bonding experience that some people share with others. The actual bleeding... Not so much.

No-one I know doesn't like their period, save my best friend (who also shares my views on marriage and kids... :rolleyes: Where she not highly sexual, I'd suspect something.) and even those who aren't in love with it are only indifferent. My plans to go on the 'Seasonale' (or whichever stops periods) pill when older are met with 'Oh, the horror! You're unnatural, and that's wiiiitchcraft or somesuch!' and the opinions that if I suddenly stopped menstruating I would be happy are met the same way.

Strangely enough, there is a girl I knew who started her periods 'late', and despite the fact that her mother and father are GPs and midwifes, and she was told repeatedly that everyone is different, she was very obsessed with starting it 'normally' and insisted on getting checked out, never mind the fact that she takes after her sisters in the lateness.
Now, she's considering going on the pill because her periods go on almost constantly and are incredibly painful. Be careful what you wish for...?

I always feel powerless when on my period and I do experience bouts of 'mini depression', too.
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#35 Lego M

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Posted 18 September 2010 - 04:51 PM

From a genderqueer/leaning towards FTM perspective, menstruation is the only time when I actually feel female. Every other day of the month if you ask me what I am, I'll either tell you I'm a guy or that it doesn't matter, but the moment that hits I feel completely female. And it's not because I'm thinking, "Oh look. Period blood. Guess I'm a woman.", it's something about the hormones that happen at the same time that completely takes away any dysphoria I feel and makes me feel right in my body for a few days.

That's honestly the only thing about menstruation that I hate, just because it makes me question myself; I don't like feeling one way 95% of the time and then pulling a full 180 at the end of the month. The physical thing itself doesn't really bother me; it's a drag, but I don't despise it, it's just kinda there. If it stopped I'd love it, but I can live with it happening. I just wish there was a way to stop the way it makes me feel.

I've heard the whole "Periods make you feminine" thing, but I always felt it was more about some kind of happy "Yay, my body's functioning correctly and can make babies!" feeling rather than a "Oh cool, blood! Go womanhood!" thing. That's just speculation on my part though.

(I have to say I'm bewildered by how many ladies - and here I'm referring to ladies like my mother - cannot stand the sight of blood. I mean you'd think they'd be used to it!)

#36 CBC.Radio.Girl

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Posted 18 September 2010 - 05:30 PM

For the record, I think the hardest thing about periods was informing my mother, when I was 12 (namely because I was SO ashamed back then and didn't want to have to go to the drug store to get products). So yeah, all things considered, I'm dealing with it much better now than then...

And was I the only one who sort of lived in this stage of perpetual fear from about 10 onwards....knowing, knowing...that sooner or later the dreaded 'it' would come and I'd probably have to end up telling my parent? Not that I didn't trust her, but damn it...I was an easily embarassed kid! Well into high school, too.... I recall staying over at my uncle's one night, and my cousin asked if she could steal a tampon. I probably looked like a cherry tomato while I mummbled something about not having any (which was true). My cousins were so....open about stuff like that. They'd even talk about it in front of their Dad, and I'd just squirm, totally red in the face, and make excuses to leave.

bleh, i relate entirely to the feelings of embarrassment. i remember being so ashamed and disgusted when i got my period. of course, the first time it happened, i had to tell my mum so she could get some, uh, "feminine products" for me (she was past menopause herself by that point, so i couldn't have just used something of hers), and i remember not wanting to look at her or be around her afterwards because she knew... Posted Image i was just mortified.

one thing that sort of baffles or irritates me is that my mum knows how much i hated getting periods, but when my anorexia was at its worst and i lost mine for six or seven years, she used to make snide comments... say, if we were just browsing through a weekly sales flyer and there was a sale on pads or tampons, she'd make a big deal out of saying, "oh, but of course you have no use for those anymore!" as if that was supposed to make me feel bad about my eating disorder and motivate me to want to be healthier. :blink: it's one of the things i liked best about being underweight...
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#37 prettyeyes

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Posted 18 September 2010 - 08:18 PM

I'm currently writing a skit in my head making fun of "women's product" commercials, titled Blood Is A Battlefield.

#38 Aiko_spacer

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Posted 18 September 2010 - 09:52 PM

I have no idea how girls (or cicgender women) feel about it tbh, I can only say that I hate it. I hate the mess, I hate the products I hate the pain I hate everything. I embrace every month it forgets to come by, what seems to be often now. I'm checked and I'm fine.

I also lose track of it on purpose or I'll be staring at the calender going 'shit its going to be back in only 3 weeks ... NOT AGAIN!'
And if I'm on pills I'll take them and skip it a whenever I feel that I can skip it.

then again I lean very hard to the androgyny /male side ... so erm, my input might not be what your after xD

#39 Astraia

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Posted 19 September 2010 - 08:08 AM

Periods don't make me feel feminine, I do like them though. I like that this is an experience I share with women around the world, and I hate the way that girls are made to feel ashamed or dirty about periods. I don't see how they're disgusting really, but then I am a bit of a feminist health nut and think hating your period is part of the over sanitised patriarchal culture we are forced to live in and as such is BULLSHIT.


I agree entirely.

I also found mine became a lot less painful after I switched to cloth pads. More comfort, less chemicals, can't be a bad thing. And the cltural construct that menstruation is somehow unclean has a lot more to do with the patriarchal view of women (and, by extension, female-specific bodily processes) than it does with the blood itself.

If Men Menstruated is an interesting feminist take on things.
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#40 Neoclassic

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Posted 27 September 2010 - 04:12 AM

Periods make me feel feminine in the "weaker, traditionally viewed as socially inferior" sort of way. They are a big inconvenience to me and I don't like them. That said, the actual discharge doesn't disgust me; it's more the cramps and headaches and general "blah" feeling. That said, if some women choose to feel empowered by them or like them, great. I only get annoyed when those women think I am somehow mistaken for not similarly cheering for joy when I feel (warning: graphic description)
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#41 ZombiesxArexLove

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Posted 01 October 2010 - 06:47 AM

Who the heck is your mom to define what being a woman means to you?

Agreed.

I totally feel the same way, as far as being disgusted by periods. My hatred of anything of that nature is incredibly extreme... I was very happy when, as a result of my anorexia, I had no period whatsoever between the ages of 16 and 22. (I now have severe osteoporosis, but even that seems better than periods... :mellow:) At 24, they're still very irregular, despite the fact that I weigh around double what I did at my thinnest. I'm still dealing with the eating disorder, and my weight goes up and down -- and to be honest, the loss of my period is about as great a motivation factor for losing weight as the fact that I feel more comfortable with myself when I'm underweight.

I also have no gender issues, in that I'm fine with the fact that I'm a female. I don't want to be a guy, I don't want to look genderless... I just can't stand things that are supposed to make a woman a woman -- breasts, hips, curves, monthly umm cycles (ewww I can't even write it...), pregnancy -- it all repulses me to a great extreme. Which is, I guess, why it ties in with the eating issues. I want to look like a female... just a pre-pubescent one. :mellow:

Anyway, sorry for rambling about myself; I'm not sure if I'm making much sense. And I'm definitely not suggesting you have the 'issues' I do. I can just relate to the feelings of disgust and hatred, A LOT, and I'd be very happy to be rid of all that nonsense forever. But yeah... I agree that it doesn't make you any less of a female. Women are all different. If there are certain parts about being females that we hate, that doesn't make us 'bad' at being women, or mean that we'd rather be guys. (And as far as the relation to violence, being hunted, etc... well, I can see where you're coming from, I guess. I'm not sure what my own feelings are on that, yet... :unsure:)


birth control does the same thing i went from a week long period to a 4 day period that's barely there. but any who your mom(sorry) is a retard. My mom said "your period is gonna be that worse thing you experience in your life. IT SUCKSSSS!!! Be happy we are later bloomers!!!!" then she went to say we also get horrible cramps if there as bad as mine tell me were getting you birth control stat." Sad part is is wasn't exaggerating at all, no one in my family was. I found out about a year later we needed birth control to manage the cramps and other aspects of our monthlies. >,>
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#42 Hi =)

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Posted 03 October 2010 - 11:03 AM

I don't think there's anything shameful about periods and am very happy for the (apparently few) women out there that enjoy/take pride in them. But I HATE them. There is nothing about them I enjoy or appreciate and everything about them is pretty terrible. It doesn't make me feel girly or feminine or like a woman, just like "Oh great, here's another body function/bodily fluid I have to manage, grrr." I especially hate the worrying about leakage, oozing onto/through clothes, sheets, etc.

I had the kind of period where I'd have intense cramps, feel weak and sick throughout the 8+ day process and have to replace super tampons every 30 minutes/1 hour, so I'd backup with pads and wads of toilet paper.

I got on the pill and this dropped down to about 3 light, almost cramp-less days (basic prescriptions all include a week of sugar pills in the monthly pack, hence monthly period. The ones that offer fewer periods have fewer sets of sugar pills. If you get one that includes no sugar pills, you'll loose it completely while on it).

After deciding I don't like taking a pill everyday and would prefer to not mess with hormone levels, I got an IUD (research told me they have been shown to cause shorter/lighter periods as well as prevent pregnancy). When first inserted, my period length/frequency/intensity shot waaaaaaaay up, but then started to decrease again. Now (about a year later) I'm at about 6 days, but mostly pretty light. Not as great as on the pill, but still better than nothing.

I still think the best solution of all would be a hysterectomy. I have no use for my uterus and don't want to have to deal with anything it does. However, this is a bit of an extreme measure and I doubt most insurance (even if I had any right now) would cover it. I also looked into ablation (scalding the lining of the uterus), but this generally only works in older women, because it is much easier for the uterus of a younger woman to heal itself and, therefore, overcome the effect of the procedure. Darn body, all wanting to heal itself :P

But then, I don't generally feel particularly feminine anyway, so not sure if this is relevant. None of the women I know that do seem to feel feminine otherwise enjoy their periods either, though.

#43 Naples

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Posted 05 October 2010 - 03:03 AM

I don't think there's anything shameful about periods and I'm pretty frank about mine, but I'd love not to have one. I hate being reminded "hey, you're fertile!" as well as female. Whether this means birth control or a hysterectomy or whatever, I'm fine with that. But in the interim I'm mostly just humiliated and embarrassed by the hassle -- seriously, something where if I have a wardrobe malfunction it announces "Hi! I have a vagina! And it's gushing bodily fluids! Everywhere!"? What the hell? I want a menstrual cup badly, just because I'm sick of leaving a trail of plastic wrappers and wadded up cotton behind me. Plus they come in cooler colors.
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#44 mylittlehazmat

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Posted 08 October 2010 - 05:16 AM

I'm cisfemale and I hate my period. True story.
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#45 64654989

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Posted 08 October 2010 - 05:35 AM

I'd do anything to be rid of them forever. I think my mother would have a heart attack if I ever requested the pill, though. I can just imagine this: "see, see, you are interested in dating/sex/etc."

I get horrible backaches as well as a bit of bloating (but I usually forget about the bloating until the pain meds kick in). It wildly varies in pain and duration. Sometimes I'm struggling not to scream, and sometimes I just feel sore.

#46 Pandoren

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Posted 08 October 2010 - 05:43 AM

I get the works- headache, cramps, nausea, vomiting, weakness, occasional dizziness, restlessness, diarrhoea, flushing hot and cold like you do when you have the flu, bloating, and I used to be so bad at one point I was hallucinating. Does it make me feel feminine? As someone else said, it reminds me I'm physically female, but I wish the periods would bugger off.

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#47 PsychoDork

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Posted 08 October 2010 - 08:29 AM

I desperately want a hysterectomy. I would do almost anything to make the damn thing stop. And though I do consider myself genderless, that is NOT the main reason I hate them so much. Periods are just plain awful. I'm STILL not used to them, and I've been having them for about 10 years. I could never get used to that... And I don't think I'd hate them much less if I was cisgender.
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#48 Hua Baoyan

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Posted 10 October 2010 - 09:51 AM

I don't think periods are very feminine at all. I am a light spotter and don't get PMS.
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#49 QueenOfSwords

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Posted 10 October 2010 - 10:26 AM

I'll raise my hand as one of the minority in this thread. While I don't like my periods terribly (depression before and cramps during the first day), I don't hate them (it?).


I do view it as a physical manifestation of femininity at its most obvious, but to me that doesn't mean oppression, weakness or submission. To me, the act of menstruation is the manifestation of everything powerful about being female. It is the embodiment of our ability to reproduce, our amazing strength and one of the things that makes us human (very few animals, if any have such a long menstruation). To me, it brings me back in touch with my 'sacred feminine' and makes me feel strong and powerful. I suppose if I was sexual, it would also make me feel very sexy.

Like breasts, no beard and small feet, it is part of who I am and I'm happy with it.
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#50 Derp

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Posted 14 November 2010 - 04:34 AM

If Men Menstruated is an interesting feminist take on things.

Nice. 8) Reminds me of something I saw linked to on another forum: Menstrual pads for real men! (Apologies if it's been posted here before)

I totally want some Blood Bath 2000 pads! Or maybe some Dexter or Sweeney Todd ones. :twisted: Or at least something without butterflies and shit on them... Posted Image

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#51 Baroness Peron

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Posted 14 November 2010 - 04:42 AM

I actually kind of enjoy my period, but then, my period is very benign and predictable. I don't get PMS, I don't bloat, I don't get cramps, I don't feel any different all from how I feel normally. I like having my period not because it makes me feel feminine, per se, but I suppose it does make me feel sort of...vital? It's a reminder that I'm very much alive and my body is very much going about its business of doing biological things.

#52 ~Salem~

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Posted 14 November 2010 - 05:01 AM

I hate mine! It has a mind of its own. I don't get PMS, or much blood, a few cramps then I'm done. But it's completely unpredictable when it arrives (I've had it for a good few years now, so it should have settled down). I might get mine every six or seven weeks, or it might skip a time or two, or it might decide to come early, early doesn't happen much though. Though me and my friend joke that the benefit of being an asexual virgin is that if I'm late I'm lucky, where as some sexual girls might be stressing if they're late.

#53 calamord

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Posted 14 November 2010 - 06:32 PM

I generally feel okay pain-wise compared to most people I think. I dont have cramps or anything anyways, and they dont seem to affect me emotionally. However, I still hate them passionately because of their sheer uselessness. I dont want babies so I dont see why I need to put up with this! They ruin my sheets and clothing, waste my money, and theyre really, really disgusting! :angry:

Frankly, I dislike most things that make me a woman... I dont WANT babies, and I dislike having to deal with all of these organs I have no use for (especially when most of them are a hindrance to me in some way). I agree with another poster on this thread, I want my prepubescent body back... Havent felt good about my body since. :(

#54 PoisonJestersMask

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Posted 17 November 2010 - 02:34 PM

Ok, this one always had me wondering. Some people like periods because it makes them feel feminine?.
If they don't have periods, they don't feel feminine anymore so they want to keep them. Anyone like that here?. I'll try not to put you down if you are the period lovin' type.

My mom has told me that my hatred of periods means I also hate being a woman.
In fact, I have such a hatred of periods, I 'd almost rather die then experience them. It's a quality of life issue.

In my mind, I'm going periods+ immune system surpression+ violence+ disease= feminity?.
Of course like any other gender issues, I had trouble wrapping my mind around this one.
So....end result is that getting sick is being feminine?.

I recall the time blocks that periods took away from other activities and what waste of time it was. I kept thinking about how meaningless this activity was. And how sitting around feeling sick wasn't terribly compatible with my other life goals, besides sitting on the internet and watching TV.
I recall just wishing time would pass quickly. So then, feminity is about wasting time, being sendentary and a loss of meaning?.

Next on my mind since the presence of periods always made me feel like a hunted animal. So from my experiences= periods= predotory..
I mean when I was subjected to periods, I felt alert for them to attack me. Does that mean feminity is about predatory responses?.
When I went on medication, it took a long time for me to become less alert...
It took a while to realize OK, I CAN MAKE plans...I don't have to think in my mind anymore, here's my healthy week and after that.. I dunno periods could strike at any moment and make me sick so I better not make any plans,I better stay home.
It was like an animal that knows a predator is lurking around and now the predator has been removed...BUT the critter is so used to being alert for the predator that the alertness continues. I would keep telling myself, the predator has been removed, YOUR"E SAFE"...You can turn off your instincts of feeling alert for the predator.


Other times, it felt like like being stalked with no safe place to go where the stalker could not follow.Periods were experienced as vectors of violence. Everywhere I would go, the stalker would follow and become violent and abusive towards me.
Like an abuser who wanted to ruin my life. Medication is the restraining order for the stalker to keep me safe.
So once again...I wonder is violence = feminity.

If periods are about feminity , then what?. Then feminitiy is about violence, being hunted , predatory issues, being disease prone, wasting time, being sendentary, then is being masculine about being safe, active, doing meaningful activities and being healthy?.


Oh well there you have it.



You pointed out a lot of emotions over your period that wouldn't even cross my mind!!! I have NO idea why you're Mother would say to you that hating your period means you hate being a woman...that is in fact the first time I ever heard that.
Having a period though shouldn't make you feel like prey or prone to disease, because men actually have a lot of problems occurring with their private parts just as much as a woman is...they just go about it in a different way.
For me personally I don't hate my period because the building up of hormones before my period is ten times more terrible than my actual period...it in itself is gentle but for a couple of weeks I feel dizzy and aura on and off until it releases and I finally have my period. I actually WANT it to come sometimes because the hormone build up is so bad!
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#55 PrettyKitty93

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Posted 18 November 2010 - 03:09 AM

My mom has told me that my hatred of periods means I also hate being a woman.
In fact, I have such a hatred of periods, I 'd almost rather die then experience them. It's a quality of life issue.


My qualm with that is that ALL types of women hate periods, all throughout the spectrum even at those who love being girly and feminine and even having babies and what not. It's generally from varying degrees a very unpleasant experience, so why would someone hating it automatically make them hate being a woman? It's like saying that you hate being human or hate being alive because you have to go through life doing bodily functions that keep you alive but otherwise serve no purpose and are potential nuances. That's just my take on it.

Next on my mind since the presence of periods always made me feel like a hunted animal. So from my experiences= periods= predotory..
I mean when I was subjected to periods, I felt alert for them to attack me. Does that mean feminity is about predatory responses?.

When I went on medication, it took a long time for me to become less alert...
It took a while to realize OK, I CAN MAKE plans...I don't have to think in my mind anymore, here's my healthy week and after that.. I dunno periods could strike at any moment and make me sick so I better not make any plans,I better stay home.
It was like an animal that knows a predator is lurking around and now the predator has been removed...BUT the critter is so used to being alert for the predator that the alertness continues. I would keep telling myself, the predator has been removed, YOUR"E SAFE"...You can turn off your instincts of feeling alert for the predator.


Other times, it felt like like being stalked with no safe place to go where the stalker could not follow.Periods were experienced as vectors of violence. Everywhere I would go, the stalker would follow and become violent and abusive towards me.
Like an abuser who wanted to ruin my life. Medication is the restraining order for the stalker to keep me safe.
So once again...I wonder is violence = feminity.

If periods are about feminity , then what?. Then feminitiy is about violence, being hunted , predatory issues, being disease prone, wasting time, being sendentary, then is being masculine about being safe, active, doing meaningful activities and being healthy?.


Oh well there you have it.


To a certain degree I think I understand what you mean there. To me, I see what you mean about the almost stalking, predatory feeling of periods because its like you're going life month thru month trying to almost enjoy when it's not going to be there. I, for example, hate making plans only to have my period show when I'm just about to go out with friends. I just can't cancel, but it's just there now and you know it's presence is just going to ruin your day, maybe even entire week.

Periods to me, I hate them with a passion. Sure, I do want to have kids in the future but I do feel a bit of irrationality for having to suffer for it... thirty odd years? Just for nine months of your life to carry a baby some women might not even want to have? I swear the whole pregnancy should have an on/off switch if it went my way but I digress.

I just don't see why, while embracing your feminimity (spl?), a girl just can't plain hate her period. Being frank, depending on the degrees of which a girl may have suffered from it (me myself being on the higher end of the pain spectrum), it's just plain terrible! You feel safe for about a few weeks until you realize man, it's probably going to come soon. Sometimes you're prepared, sometimes it's late, or worse case scenario it sneaks up on you and now you have a potential wardrobe malfunction. You always have to be armed with pads or tampons no matter what or feel paranoid it's coming after you, not wear any bright colored pants when "it's" coming or already here, and then sometimes you get those horrible cramps that make you feel nausceous before the darn thing has even started, to the point of missing out on schoo/work/fun ect. due to the pain and like in my case, nothing short of serious painkillers do anything for you. (Midol or Pamprin just aint cutting it <_< ) And then once it actually does start, you walk around worrying constantly about leaks or anything, worrying you reek of blood, worrying people just know because now your angry and emotional despite how you're trying not to 'act-like-you're-on-your-period.) Finally, anywhere from three days to a week of heavy bleeding and ruined underwear later, you finally feel safe... for about another two or three weeks. Although you're never 'totally' safe, because the female body is a crazy one and the one day you forget to carry an extra pad in your purse... it'll be back. Oh, it'll be back alright. With a vengance. Multiply this times twelve months and how many years until you hit like fourty-five, and it sounds like a down right horror story.

So yeah, I think if anything we should be allowed the satisfaction of hating it, since there isn't jack else we can do about it (well besides those who're on the pill and stuff, I'm actually kind of scared to take it 1. because asking my mom to get on birth-control would be the equivilant to me telling her "hey, I'm gonna go have sex now." when in all reality I feel sex is vile and 2. because I get scared that in anyway altering or stopping my period will screw my body up. It probably won't, but I'm a scary person in reality.)

I think that's it now... sorry about my unintentionally-long horror story-esque rant. :lol:

#56 Idraena

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Posted 28 November 2010 - 10:40 PM

Yep ... I second what everyone else has said ... I'm a cisfemale, perfectly happy with being female, but I hate my period.

My periods are very heavy, and my PMS makes me feel awful -- I absolutely HATE feeling out of control, and when I PMS, I can tell I'm acting terribly and being illogical and irrational, but I literally cannot do anything about it. I feel so childish and out of control, and I hate it. And as for the periods themselves -- I have periods every so often where I cannot do anything but curl up in a ball and be miserable. I have gone out to do things with family and ended up literally being debilitated -- sitting in a corner of the hotel room, for example, or on a mini golf course where I was forced to sink down to the ground in pain. I don't understand why anyone would enjoy that, or welcome it. It doesn't make me feel feminine; it makes me feel like an out-of-control, spiteful, irrational bitch with pain issues intensified by my refusal to take any kind of medication unless it's truly BAD.

So I don't know why anyone would welcome/want their period. None of my friends do -- the best feeling they've reported towards it is apathy -- and they are for the most part perfectly happy with being female/feminine otherwise.

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#57 LouLou

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Posted 28 November 2010 - 10:49 PM

I definitely don't feel more feminine when I am on my period. I would love to just get rid of it. Part of me wants to go on one of those birth controls, that make you have it less often, though I don't know how practical that is lol

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#58 Syrella

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Posted 02 December 2010 - 02:01 AM

Ugh, I hate periods. There have been countless days when I've been sick with the "flu" and unable to do much. I've missed class and other events so many times. The symptoms are no fun and there's really nothing good about the process. I'm also one of those cases where the pill didn't help much. I went on it awhile during high school and while it helped with the monthly cycle, everything else was crappy. I'd be crying all the time for no reason and was generally a mess. xD I couldn't stand to be on them so I went off again. I guess I'd rather be sick for two or three days than be well for those days and not feel like myself for the rest of the time.

If there were a magical button that could suddenly turn off periods, I think I'd be there. I don't want kids. And even if I later change my mind, there's a magic thing called adoption... or better yet, host kids. And pets! They come stay for awhile, then they leave! :D What more could you want?

But yeah, I wouldn't worry if you don't like your periods. I think that's pretty normal.

#59 isitso

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Posted 02 December 2010 - 06:21 AM

Having a period actually makes me feel inherently less feminine. I associate femininity with character, and periods are a matter of the flesh. Having my period grounds me, it interrupts me, therefore it interferes with my femininity. This may come off as illogical as a period is something only women experience, though I suppose my perception of periods and femininity could have to do with age old gender stereotypes of women being dainty and clean. However, this is not a conscious effort on my part as I consider myself feminine but I am not a cleaning pansy of any sort.




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