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Incredibly Ace Moments


you*hear*but*do*you*listen

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cleuchtturm

And I don't get any of the innuendoes in Family Guy.

So...why do you watch it? The wonderful animation style? :lol:

Beer goggles? Never heard of such a thing.

Really?! We had them in health class. Put them on and you see things how you would when you're wasted.

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AlexisMorgan

And I don't get any of the innuendoes in Family Guy.

So...why do you watch it? The wonderful animation style? :lol:

Beer goggles? Never heard of such a thing.

Really?! We had them in health class. Put them on and you see things how you would when you're wasted.

I wore those during my driving exam! :D

...J/K :P

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Christine L.S

I had two ace moments with my family...

Once we were watching tv (food network mind you):

Mom: That guy is hot. Who on this channel do you like?

Me: Alton Brown.

Mom: But he has to be at least forty...why?

Me: He's smart

*silence*

(anyone else have intellectual crushes...no physical attraction, but I guess admiration?)

Another awkward conversation with my mother:

Mom: So when are you getting a boyfriend again?

Me: Geez, It hasn't been a year yet.

Mom: You know, you can tell me anything.

Me: And what are you getting at?

Mom: If you are a lesbian, I am cool with that...just tell me.

Me: Mom, I am not gay. I would have told you by now!

Eventually, I'll tell my family that I am asexual, but I am not ready yet. Oh the conversation would kill me.

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Gho St Ory Qwan

(anyone else have intellectual crushes...no physical attraction, but I guess admiration?)

Yes, it's near enough the only kind of attraction I get to people that could be close enough to a crush. I also get strong 'Aww cute!' feelings.

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When I was younger, I used to dress in a gothic style. I loved wearing my huge buckled combat boots because they made me over six feet tall, and they went with everything! (I also lost weight from stomping around in them... those platforms are heavy!) They were the coolest boots I ever had, and it's rare for me to like my footwear because normally I wear very plain shoes, since any decently cute women's shoe didn't accommodate my wide feet. Until my cousin almost ruined them for me. He looked at me and told me they were hooker boots! I was appalled and insisted that hooker boots had skinnier heels, and these heels were too chunky to be considered sexual. Honestly, I never considered they could be considered as sexy because the website I ordered them from described the style as unisex.

Also from my goth days, when I left the house with my mom to go shopping for groceries, my mom would go suddenly very quiet. I'd keep chattering away to fill the silence, but then she'd look at me with wide eyes and whisper something. I'd loudly ask, "What?", so she'd motion for me to come closer, so I'd come over to listen.

"Did you see that guy?" She'd whisper again.

"Which guy?" I'm not sure who she means. There are a lot of males shopping. I look around.

"That one!" She'd point one out.

"Oh. Yeah." I'd look hard, but see nothing interesting about him.

"He was checking you out!" She'd smile.

"What? Hahahaha! Nah, I doubt it!"

Then she'd give me this look, so I'd explain that they probably thought I looked funny. She'd shake her head as though she knew better, and I'd spend the rest of the day hoping she wasn't right, because something about that creeps me out.

But my mom always thinks men are checking me out. Maybe she's being hopeful. XD

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While browsing through tumblr, This photoset showed up on my dash.

I wasn't sure what to think at first. Then I thought, oh a ribbon! .... Wait, I found this on the Incredibly Ace Moments thread.... .........

OH IT'S A PENIS hahaha, very funny gaiz~~

My parents and I are going to be moving out soon. We're moving into a semi-detached house (we're the lower tenants, thus have a main floor and the basement). I was telling my friend A and K about it the house.

Me: ... and there's a basement. It's pretty big, there's a big room where the previous tenants had an exercise room, an extra room which they used as an office, a bathroom and a washer and dryer.

A: So you'll take the basement?

Me: Exactly. It'll be my woman cave!

A: That's great, that means you can be as loud as you want!

Me: ..... why would I be loud?

A: You know.... being as loud as you want?

K: *snickers*

Me: ... There's no reason for me to be loud? (I wouldn't have a TV... and I don't yell at my computer when I do play games...?)

A: *grins and pats my head* Oh nevermind.

Me: *still thinking* .... Oh my god you mean that!

K: *bursts out laughing*

Punchline: (in case you don't get it)

My woman cave is a good place to masturbate. Nevermind that my parents would be upstairs, you know... :lol:

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granolachild

Then she'd give me this look, so I'd explain that they probably thought I looked funny. She'd shake her head as though she knew better, and I'd spend the rest of the day hoping she wasn't right, because something about that creeps me out.

But my mom always thinks men are checking me out. Maybe she's being hopeful. XD

Ditto. My mom does this to me every time we go somewhere. And the idea of these men checking me out IS creepy. Somehow I think that it would be less creepy if I were sexual. Anyway,

Ace moment today!

My associates were talking about which celebrities they wanted to have sex with, and all of them were what they consider hot and sexy male actors. My name is Gigi, and one of these girls says,

"Ooooh. I bet Gigi would really like to fuck David Bowie. Yeah, she'd fuck him."

To this I say, "No, I would really like to be David Bowie's soulmate. He and I could connect on so many levels. He's such a deep thinker! I really admire that."

This girl stares at me. Everyone gets quiet. And then she asks if I'm kidding. :unsure:

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Gallifreyan

I prepared a culture of bacteria for my aquatic pathobiology class and when I went back a couple of days later to find growth on my agar plate, I got so excited that I had, in a way, created life. Then it occurred to me, "This must be how normal people feel when they conceive a child... :blink: bacteria is my baby!"

I know asexuality does not equal not wanting children but, for me personally, the two compliment each other nicely so I consider this an ace moment.

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A few years ago, my town had a really bad ice storm. The electricity at my house was out for five days. Because there was no heater, we had to use the fireplace to keep warm. But, while my mom and brother got to sleep on the mattress nearest to the fireplace with a nice big blanket, I got to sleep farthest away from it on the floor with a very thin quilt. And it was FREEZING. Anyway, this is just to set up that I was already annoyed with my mom and brother. Plus, being stuck around each other all day in the cold didn't help.

So, on the third day or so, my mom and brother were sitting close to the fire, and I was sitting on the floor, trying to write something to keep myself sane. Well, one of the logs on the fire had a little branch sticking out, which my mom decided to call the log's "penis". Thus, my mom and brother began to make a ton of sexual jokes about the log. After about five minutes or so, I got really sick of hearing them making these jokes. So, I thought that if I took the poker for the fire, I could hit the branch until it fell of the log, and then they'd have to shut up about it. So, I told them, "If you don't shut up about that, I'm going to whack it off."

Then, my mom said, "Shenhua!! I can't believe you said that!" And they were both looking at me in shock. I had no idea what I had said that was so bad. I asked what she meant, but she just said, "You know what you said!" ...It took me months to find out what I had said wrong... I think I finally asked a friend or ended up hearing it.

For those of you who don't know and want to know:

Although I was using "whack" to mean "to hit something with force", there is a different definition of "whack off".

From urbandictionary.com:

" "Whack off" Can mean one of two things:

1) To stroke a penis, either by masturbation or by doing it for someone else

2) To kill someone in Mafia lingo

For definition 1: "I'm whacking off right now.", "Your sister whacked me off last night.""

Well, at least I knew the second definition. The first one surprised and terrified me... Especially once I realized what I had said.

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Then she'd give me this look, so I'd explain that they probably thought I looked funny. She'd shake her head as though she knew better, and I'd spend the rest of the day hoping she wasn't right, because something about that creeps me out.

But my mom always thinks men are checking me out. Maybe she's being hopeful. XD

Ditto. My mom does this to me every time we go somewhere. And the idea of these men checking me out IS creepy. Somehow I think that it would be less creepy if I were sexual. Anyway,

Ace moment today!

My associates were talking about which celebrities they wanted to have sex with, and all of them were what they consider hot and sexy male actors. My name is Gigi, and one of these girls says,

"Ooooh. I bet Gigi would really like to fuck David Bowie. Yeah, she'd fuck him."

To this I say, "No, I would really like to be David Bowie's soulmate. He and I could connect on so many levels. He's such a deep thinker! I really admire that."

This girl stares at me. Everyone gets quiet. And then she asks if I'm kidding. :unsure:

I also get really creeped out by the prospect of being checked out. There's a candy store near my school that I run to between classes to get a snack sometimes, and the cashier guy (reasonably close to my age) asks me if I'm single and tells me that I'm beautiful every single time. And I'm just like "...kthxbai."

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Strangely Brown

Failing to realise the meaning of the 'rear of the year' competition, to the amusement of all around me...

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Batman's Ace

(anyone else have intellectual crushes...no physical attraction, but I guess admiration?)

Yes, it's near enough the only kind of attraction I get to people that could be close enough to a crush. I also get strong 'Aww cute!' feelings.

Yup yup! I'm sapioromantic.

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No wonder traffic is good so far today. (Nearly 400 hits total, 18 views on the sapioromanticism article, 8 of which came from your link).

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I guess this is more aromantic, but I had a dream the other night where I was swimming in a pool alone, painting a coral reef on the bottom, when this girl I know comes in and watches me for a bit, then says, "Caleb, it's very hard for me to describe my feelings for you right now, but I think it would be spiritually advantageous for both of us if we started dating." I just swam away without saying anything. :lol:

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Had one just now

Sisters male friend was over and we were watching some Mythbuster explosive action. Anyway, commercials happen and this commercial for something comes on with a shirtless guy running around and doing stuff. I was eating my chips and he says to my sister "Well, your sister is enjoying this." I looked at him, glanced at the commercial, back to him and about two seconds later went "Oh. No, actually."

I haven't told my sister I'm ace yet, but she might have an idea that I am without knowing the term exists. She just laughed and said I wasn't like most teenage girls.

Such is my total indifference to shirtless guys!

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Ase of Spades

Any time a commercial featuring muscular or attractive men comes on, all I can ever think is "I wish I could get pictures of him. I'm horrible at drawing muscular builds and I desperately need references, and he would be perfect." It never dawns on me until later that the makers of the comercial were probably going for sex appeal.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kf4ufAwdCao

In what I consider a "most triumphant example" of the above, when I saw this commercial for the first time, I couldn't tear my eyes away because I was so stunned at how detailed the paint was. I thought they were actually wearing clothes until the camera zoomed on and showed it washing right off. I was completely mesmerized by how authentic their outfits looked; I couldn't care less about how attractive they were or the fact that they were naked. :lol:

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For the first few seconds, it really did look an outfit to me-though perhaps, a rather skin tight outfit.

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In what I consider a "most triumphant example" of the above, when I saw this commercial for the first time, I couldn't tear my eyes away because I was so stunned at how detailed the paint was. I thought they were actually wearing clothes until the camera zoomed on and showed it washing right off. I was completely mesmerized by how authentic their outfits looked; I couldn't care less about how attractive they were or the fact that they were naked. :lol:

I've seen that commercial dozens of times and I've never thought that someone might watch it and think "sexy". :blink:

I liked the commercial for the reasons you said and because, one, that shower looked sooo relaxing, and two, I loved the way they were near literally washing their work stress away. Other then that I only noticed that there were three or so men and only one woman. :huh:

Personally I think a commercial like that works better on asexuals because we aren't Distracted by the Sexy. Then again, you and I both paid more attention to the paint then the brand name, so... :P

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CrazyCatLover

I'm not sure whether this really counts or not. Anyway, I learned awhile ago how to change bras under my shirt for modesty. Right now I'm in my bedroom with the curtains closed, the door locked and bolted. I just took my bra off under my shirt. Then I promptly took my shirt off to change into my PJs. I guess I wanted to minimize the time I was "indecent." ????

Or maybe the true answer lies in the fact that the one knitting book I brought with me is about Victorian era lace...

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Wookieinmashoo

Me and someone else are looking at what the storm will be like on a live radar.

Him: Look at that weather pattern!

Me: (I look at it) yep, looks like we are going to get some heavy storms.

Him: No, I meant the shape.

Me: ....it looks like a T-bone (steak).

Him: ....It looks like a penis!

Me: (I look again) Nope, T-bone.

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Punchline: (in case you don't get it)

My woman cave is a good place to masturbate. Nevermind that my parents would be upstairs, you know... :lol:

Actually i thought they were referring to being loud while having sex, not when you were alone. this is my ace moment for today, since i keep forgetting that people masturbate :blink:

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People actually moan and scream while masturbating? I guess that's my Ace moment for today.

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Apparently the barmaid at my mother's wake was into me tonight. I didn't really realise until my brother told me. He's not one to pay me a compliment so I guess it was true, I didn't really notice with it not being an appropriate situation and all. I did get free drinks though.

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forgotten account

Awhile ago I was watching a movie with my friends and they kept drooling over some guy's abs. They told me to look at them but all I could think of was "wow, it must take some real dedication to working out to get muscles like that!" ...Oops?

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Josephine Stone

A bunch of friends playing that game 'dirty minds'. It's a bunch of cards with questions on them that are suppose to make you think of dirty things when the answer is always very tame. I always win this game :D

"what vibrates and goes between your legs?" motorcycle!

"a premature evacuation?" fire drill!

the only problem is that I usual don't get what everyone else is thinking of so it's a very boring game for me.

I'm also pretty good at this game. But I do get it. We played this with mine and my husband's parents and his grandparents...

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