Incredibly Ace Moments

[MakeupJunkie4]

1 hour ago, Kaicepl said:

I've had many of these over the years, oh boy. 

 

When I was young I was confused about sex and why people even engaged in it unless they were actually trying to produce offspring? Didn't see any appeal whatsoever. So I asked my mom about it once and she just gave me this blank look and silence for a while before saying "Because... it's enjoyable?" I was very confused but I thought less confused than when I went into the conversation. 

 

Fast forward to middle school. My lunch group seemed always very keen on laughing about sexual things, they found it hilarious. I didn't really get the appeal or why they thought sex was funny, but I mostly just ignored it. 

One day some of them were talking about boys or something and I was in a spaced-out state as I oftentimes slip into. I heard one of the girls say something like "I just really have a weakness when it comes to abs!"(clutching her chest)

I, for some reason, chose this moment to come back into reality. Popping my head up, I said very clearly: "I dunno, I actually enjoy the ab workouts." 

Thinking that she was talking about athletics, since we had that class together. My mother is a fitness coach so I guess I was used to that talk anyways?

 

Everyone laughed at me, and my face instantly heated. 

 

 

I'm now in high school, and my best friend is ace as well. Usually we and a couple of close friends sit in an empty teacher's room or the library for lunch. Well one day for some reason I went back to the place where some of the people I used to sit with were, and a guy was talking to this girl who had excitedly come over and was talking about something. Another girl came over to listen too. They gave the first girl high fives and seemed excited for her. I soon realized that she was telling them about losing her virginity. Immediately I became sick to my stomach at why they would act this way, went hurriedly to the bathroom to sit in the quiet, just being confused and feeling like such a freak. Wondering if that's how I'm supposed to act? I just felt strange inside, like I was expected to force myself to be something else, but knowing that I wouldn't. 

I think too many people put too much emphasis on sex, to the point where it becomes an accomplishment to brag about. It's personal, in my opinion, and should be kept private. Dare I say, it should also be a decision that's made later on in life, and if the person decides to lose their virginity, it should be with someone they've committed to? Maybe it's just me but that seems to make more sense than approaching it as an accomplishment that's rushed into without much thought. But I digress. I think your reaction was appropriate. You didn't tell her what to do, so I think it's understandable. I had a similar reaction when a friend of mine lost theirs in my high school days. 👍

[Kaicepl]

4 minutes ago, Jenna444 said:

I think too many people put too much emphasis on sex, to the point where it becomes an accomplishment to brag about. It's personal, in my opinion, and should be kept private. Dare I say, it should also be a decision that's made later on in life, and if the person decides to lose their virginity, it should be with someone they've committed to? Maybe it's just me but that seems to make more sense than approaching it as an accomplishment that's rushed into without much thought. But I digress. I think your reaction was appropriate. You didn't tell her what to do, so I think it's understandable. I had a similar reaction when a friend of mine lost theirs in my high school days. 👍

No, I completely agree! It's so public and celebrated at premature stages, and I definitely think it should be kept at least a bit more private. 

[Kathleenah]

13 hours ago, dragon_nerd said:

It is definitely a big deal! And coming out is scary, every time. (says the person who has only come out twice)

Well yeah this id just my first proper coming out so its good. Glad to hear others have felt the same!

[Aarineko]

8 minutes ago, Kathleenah said:

Well yeah this id just my first proper coming out so its good. Glad to hear others have felt the same!

I only came out to my ex and he took it really well... still I was soooo stressed thinking about how he would react or if he goes around telling people like "don't say I told you but ..."

Still hope he won't talk about it with our friends --' 

[Rwkropf]

13 hours ago, dragon_nerd said:

It is definitely a big deal! And coming out is scary, every time. (says the person who has only come out twice)

I've only come out twice myself. The first time was a few years ago where I was asked to go to the hospital to get checked up on, and told to tell noone that I am ace.

 

The second time was a couple days ago where I was talking to a coworker and she was trying to guess the sexual orientations of other staff. I asked her to guess mine, and when she guessed straight, I explained that "I don't feel attraction either direction". Turns out she already knew about asexuality, and was excited to finally know someone who is ace.

 

Despite my coworker's amazing reaction, it is down right terrifying to come out.

[QuirkyGeek]

9 hours ago, The Mechanic said:

I was watching Les Miserables yesterday and I had to skip through the scenes when Fantine is in the red light district because all the sexual references and double entendres in the songs were making me feel SO UNCOMFORTABLE

I did that as a play this year in high school, which brings me to an ace moment.

 

All of the girls in the chorus were hoping to get the part of being a prostitute, and I was just like "Um, no thanks! I'd rather not be a prostitute."

[Amaretti]

I had an imaginary boyfriend in middle school so my friends would stop pressuring me to hurry up and lose my v-card. He was the most unlikely and unrealistic person yet all my friends bought it and would always ask about him.

[CFilipek]

1 hour ago, QuirkyGeek said:

I did that as a play this year in high school, which brings me to an ace moment.

 

All of the girls in the chorus were hoping to get the part of being a prostitute, and I was just like "Um, no thanks! I'd rather not be a prostitute."

Yeah, I actually skipped out on being in Les Mis in high school since I was sure the only parts for the female ensemble was to play a prostitute and I wasn't comfortable with that

[Hermit Advocate]

Has anyone noticed that the way they sing the words "lovely ladies" sounds just like the "oompa loompa" song in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? I always replace the words in my head and the song instantly becomes more bearable. 

[Laplace]

8 hours ago, Jenna444 said:

I think too many people put too much emphasis on sex, to the point where it becomes an accomplishment to brag about. It's personal, in my opinion, and should be kept private. Dare I say, it should also be a decision that's made later on in life, and if the person decides to lose their virginity, it should be with someone they've committed to? Maybe it's just me but that seems to make more sense than approaching it as an accomplishment that's rushed into without much thought. But I digress. I think your reaction was appropriate. You didn't tell her what to do, so I think it's understandable. I had a similar reaction when a friend of mine lost theirs in my high school days. 👍

I just don't understand why it's seen as such an accomplishment to lose your virginity. It's like, if I really wanted to lose it, I could go call some random sex worker. I'm definitely not the most flirtatious or "sexy" person, and I've had opportunities to have sex or initiate contact of some kind (that's on further reflection cause I'm too dense to think about it in the moment 😛). It's not remarkable at all. Everyone is like, "Oh, you must not be attractive," or "You must be a nerd," but that's not the reason at all. The majority of people on planet Earth get laid at some point in their lives. That includes "nerds" and "unpopular" kids. But some people treat it like it's an exclusive club that they want access to right away.

[CFilipek]

4 hours ago, Hey you in the corner said:

Has anyone noticed that the way they sing the words "lovely ladies" sounds just like the "oompa loompa" song in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? I always replace the words in my head and the song instantly becomes more bearable. 

Oh my god, you're right! I never noticed that but now I can't stop hearing it, haha

 

I worked merchandise at a theater for a year and they did a production of Les Mis so I became desensitized to the song I heard it so many times

[Willgracefan]

4 hours ago, Laplace said:

I just don't understand why it's seen as such an accomplishment to lose your virginity. It's like, if I really wanted to lose it, I could go call some random sex worker. I'm definitely not the most flirtatious or "sexy" person, and I've had opportunities to have sex or initiate contact of some kind (that's on further reflection cause I'm too dense to think about it in the moment 😛). It's not remarkable at all. Everyone is like, "Oh, you must not be attractive," or "You must be a nerd," but that's not the reason at all. The majority of people on planet Earth get laid at some point in their lives. That includes "nerds" and "unpopular" kids. But some people treat it like it's an exclusive club that they want access to right away.

Before I accepted I was ace I'd always just assume I'd hire a gigilo so I could say I'd have sex before I'd die. Like it was an accomplishment I just had to fulfill.

 

I also very badly and judgementally also got a little upset when I saw "ugly couples" together and just think, "dude, if they can get some, why can't I" 

I now know why, it's cause I'm not wired to want that. And it's just great that people can find each other and be happy, it's just not in the cards for me. 

[Mitoplasm_Cytocondria]

A while back I was reading some Undertale comics because my friends were getting into Undertale, so I decided to see what it was about, and there was one that mentioned, "The Bone-Zone" 

 

 

My friend had to explain it to me

I thought it was some hidden in-game level or something

 

 

 

[Mitoplasm_Cytocondria]

For the longest time I thought "Netflix and chill" actually meant Netflix and chill

I was wondering why people kept saying it 

 

[Mitoplasm_Cytocondria]

On 12/9/2008 at 10:28 PM, you*hear*but*do*you*listen said:

This is my most ace moment ever, as well as my nerdiest.

Me: We've been studying DNA replication in AP Bio. It makes me so happy; genetics is the shit.

Friend: If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.

Me: I'd be topoisomerase because it has a cool name!

*friend and surrounding friends snicker for a while*

Me: Wait...that was sexual, wasn't it?

It took me about 2 minutes to figure out what that meant 

I was more proud of myself that I knew what those things were ;w;

[Mitoplasm_Cytocondria]

On 12/14/2008 at 3:57 PM, Sally said:

What kind of a T-shirt could there be that would express that the light bulb had been screwed but hated it? A lit-up, screwed-in bulb saying "ICK!"? A light bulb looking at the socket saying "Never again!"? Hmmm...

A burnt out lightbulb? 

Or would that make them dead o-o

[Mitoplasm_Cytocondria]

On 12/15/2008 at 2:11 AM, knoxroxmysox said:

Hmmm... I feel like any of these things could have happened to me and I would have reacted the same way. Except for the magic mushrooms. But anyway...

The "asexual moment" that comes back to me happened over the summer. I was with my boyfriend (first and last and highly regrettable) and we had gotten these giant Pepsi icees. He finished his off in about 5 minutes, but I was drinking mine more slowly.

I was drinking through a straw, so I was getting more liquid than ice, so I had to keep moving the straw around to get to the icee parts. The whole time, he was staring at me with this indescribable (amazed, hopeful, overjoyed, turned on?) look on his face. I ignored him, until he asked me "Do you have any idea what you look like doing that?"

I didn't. The only thing my mind could come up with was a butter churn. He proceeded to inform me that the correct answer was "oral sex."

Wow. Talk about the farthest thing from my mind, right?

Also, I was recently dragged into seeing Twilight with my two female cousins, my aunt, and my mom. They (including my mom!) spent the rest of the day drooling over Edward Cullen and the hot, sexy vampires. I had absolutely nothing to contribute to the conversation (to the relief of my brother, who was also sick of hearing them talk about him). It's not that I didn't like the movie. I thought it was good- or at least I cut it some slack since it was an adaptation/digest of a much lengthier book containing much more plot explanation and character development. My expectations going in were somewhat low. But my ONLY real opinion about the character of Edward Cullen is "his hair looks kind of funny." He's no more aesthetically attractive to me than most normal people. Apparently, this is... unusual.

Dude I totally get you with the Twilight thing.

I had never read or watched Twilight before, but my friends were OBSESSED with the series

They introduced me to one of the characters by showing me a picture of I think Edward

"Isn't he sooo hot?"

I just kinda stared at the picture for a sec, trying to evaluate what they meant

The only thing I could muster: "He's kinda... pointy looking?"

They never bothered me with Twilight again

 

[QuirkyGeek]

 

17 hours ago, Mitoplasm_Cytocondria said:

On ‎2008‎-‎12‎-‎15 at 3:11 AM, knoxroxmysox said:

Hmmm... I feel like any of these things could have happened to me and I would have reacted the same way. Except for the magic mushrooms. But anyway...

The "asexual moment" that comes back to me happened over the summer. I was with my boyfriend (first and last and highly regrettable) and we had gotten these giant Pepsi icees. He finished his off in about 5 minutes, but I was drinking mine more slowly.

I was drinking through a straw, so I was getting more liquid than ice, so I had to keep moving the straw around to get to the icee parts. The whole time, he was staring at me with this indescribable (amazed, hopeful, overjoyed, turned on?) look on his face. I ignored him, until he asked me "Do you have any idea what you look like doing that?"

I didn't. The only thing my mind could come up with was a butter churn. He proceeded to inform me that the correct answer was "oral sex."

Wow. Talk about the farthest thing from my mind, right?

Also, I was recently dragged into seeing Twilight with my two female cousins, my aunt, and my mom. They (including my mom!) spent the rest of the day drooling over Edward Cullen and the hot, sexy vampires. I had absolutely nothing to contribute to the conversation (to the relief of my brother, who was also sick of hearing them talk about him). It's not that I didn't like the movie. I thought it was good- or at least I cut it some slack since it was an adaptation/digest of a much lengthier book containing much more plot explanation and character development. My expectations going in were somewhat low. But my ONLY real opinion about the character of Edward Cullen is "his hair looks kind of funny." He's no more aesthetically attractive to me than most normal people. Apparently, this is... unusual.

Dude I totally get you with the Twilight thing.

I had never read or watched Twilight before, but my friends were OBSESSED with the series

They introduced me to one of the characters by showing me a picture of I think Edward

"Isn't he sooo hot?"

I just kinda stared at the picture for a sec, trying to evaluate what they meant

The only thing I could muster: "He's kinda... pointy looking?"

They never bothered me with Twilight again

 

That reminds me of a time when I was reading the Twilight series and discussing it with a friend. She was complaining that in the movies Edward wasn't hot and all the other vampires (and werewolves) were. I had never seen the movie, but I agreed and talked about the pros and cons about the producers choosing a not-so-hot actor for Edward compared to the other actors. I don't think she thought I was crazy, but I found participating in the conversation was difficult.

[QuirkyGeek]

Well, I was playing an online mofia/werewolf game, and there's a chat bar. This happened and although nothing bad really happened it creeped me out and I still feel creeped out. There was some conversation between the first line and the others, but that was other people. I'm hoping this didn't mean anything at all, and I'm glad it ended here.

 

John Willard: Martha are you a girl irl

Martha Corey (Me): Yeah, but the name was completely random.

John Willard: that's hot

Martha Corey (Me): ...

[Redshirt Jim]

One time has this 

I was selling noodles for fundraising events 

One upperclassmen came up with her friends and asks "What flavor you got?"

"There's chicken and beef."

"I want the flavor of you. "

I blinked twice...I don't remember Yu being a flavor. How am I going to explain we don't have that flavor?

"Forget I said anything. I'll take two. How much?"

And I said to her the price. I managed to get her to buy it 1 dollar more expensive than it should be. 

My brain is only good for selling the noddles apparentlly

 

[Chill2017]

19 hours ago, Mitoplasm_Cytocondria said:

For the longest time I thought "Netflix and chill" actually meant Netflix and chill

I was wondering why people kept saying it 

 

Wait a sec.  Is "netflix and chill" sexual. I use chill as my screen name and i love netflix.  Please explain. 

[dragon_nerd]

On June 27, 2017 at 9:03 PM, dragon_nerd said:

  Hide contents

It's a euphemism for having sex 

It also has nothing to do with watching Netflix

 

^Read at your own peril

Wow, we always come round to this every couple of pages don't we.

[Aarineko]

Just now, dragon_nerd said:

Wow, we always come round to this every couple of pages don't we.

We do... But come on... It sounds like the perfect plan ... What am I supposed to say now when I want to netflix and chill ? 

[Redshirt Jim]

 

1 minute ago, Aarineko said:

We do... But come on... It sounds like the perfect plan ... What am I supposed to say now when I want to netflix and chill ? 

Add literally(?)

[Redshirt Jim]

O yeah, as an engineer...

You know all those dirty sex jokes that happens cause nuts and bolts, crank and shaft and all other pull and push mechanism?

I ussually think in reverse as in....

Dirty sex scenes turned into  nuts and bolts, and crank and shaft. 

Even the lubrication mechanism...

More interested in counting the torque, the force and the acceleration than test it in the field

Ha ha ha. 

 

[Redshirt Jim]

Ooh I remember another !

(I am on fire today ...ehhem..flaming ace ^^)

I like to eat bananas. So, on the break of a seminar I ate a banana. Naturally it was an invitation for sex jokes. EVERY SINGLE DAMN TIME ever since middle school. 

And I had it. 

So after this guy let's call him (A) whom I met at the seminar deliver the ever so popular banana dick jokes, he was up to tell his plan for the future as an engineer...

And then, when he hold the mic, I who was standing behind the moderator whom was waiting patiently for the answer, decide to eat the banana. So I can at least eat it in peace...or watch (A) got flustered. Win-win.  

Naturally, he became flustered, can't take his eyes off me, swallow his spit and even say "Good God. Please stop." almost pleading while holding the mic. I sigh there goes my chance of eating in peace. But the reaction was hilarious. Others  finds it funny too, while  some are not catching on, or unwilling to seem they get it. 

And everyone looked at me and I calmly looked at them with a face that say "What did I do?"

He tried to defend himself "Xe was eating a banana!!" He accused

And I just shrug and said "I was hungry. I thought we can eat at the seminar." True, a girl beside me was eating her cake as I speak. 

 

After the seminar, I actually said to him "O yeah, I'm having sausages for lunch."

 

"Fuck you." 

 

In case you're wondering: We didn't fuck. 

 

[Mitoplasm_Cytocondria]

4 hours ago, Chill2017 said:

Wait a sec.  Is "netflix and chill" sexual. I use chill as my screen name and i love netflix.  Please explain. 

Apparently "Netflix and chill" is sexual :/ The word "chill" isn't, as far as I know, and Netflix isn't a sexual word.

One Google search will give you the answers you never wanted

#ripme

[Amaretti]

I recently worked a wedding and the groom was taking his time getting the garter off the bride. Things got a little... too frisky under the dress and they had to get a prompting from one of my bosses to stop. We were watching this all go down and my other boss gave me a firm pat on the back and said something like "isn't that what this tradition is supposed to suggest anyway?" Debased, I blurted "wait, is it!?" My boss made fun of me the rest of the night.

[Willgracefan]

34 minutes ago, Amaretti said:

I recently worked a wedding and the groom was taking his time getting the garter off the bride. Things got a little... too frisky under the dress and they had to get a prompting from one of my bosses to stop. We were watching this all go down and my other boss gave me a firm pat on the back and said something like "isn't that what this tradition is supposed to suggest anyway?" Debased, I blurted "wait, is it!?" My boss made fun of me the rest of the night.

Boo. I'm sorry he made fun of you. That's just not right. 

This tradition has always been so silly to me. I cringe when I'm at a wedding where they do that. 

[Amaretti]

3 minutes ago, Willgracefan said:

This tradition has always been so silly to me. I cringe when I'm at a wedding where they do that. 

A looooooot of wedding traditions are silly. I work so many I'm so desensitized to whatever charm people might see in them