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Free-response survey for asexuals


BlueSandshrew

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Sister Nightfall

How old are you?

20

What country do you live in?

Denmark

What religion do you identify with, if any?

An undefined religion I have inventeded myself from books I have read :blush:

Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

I am definetly romantic, but I have no idea what kind of relationsships I would like to have

Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Nope, but have wanted to once or twice

When did you first start to think you were asexual?

I found out of the term ‘asexual’ a year or two ago and figured that that would be me in some way. I never had experienced sexual attraction, but thought that there was something wrong with me (thank God that Wikipedia has asexual in the category of sexual orientations)

What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I think it is Platon who had the idea of a cave with shadows of animals. The real animal (as God had intended it) would stand in the entrance of the cave and the shadow it cast is the shape it gets on earth. I think he called them (the original animals) for ideas and they would be perfect. - This is explained from memory and is not necessarily entirely correct.

I view sex as two things 1. The idea. 2. The thing that actually happens. I am very attracted to the idea, but is slightly repulsed from the actual thing.

I don't know if this answer made any sense at all

As for masturbation - I'm generally repulsed by that region of the body, but as it gives some kind of pleasure without getting to messy I do it sometimes although it is kind of rare.

Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Nope and I doubt I will ever do that, as sexual orientation seems to be a subject which keeps popping up in conversation (often in connection with a situation where I refuse to exchange salvia with somebody)

Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No, but then again I have never been checked for any :rolleyes:

On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

4, sometimes higher other times lower (especially when I'm around people)

Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Nope

Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I would like to experience attraction like sexuals just to see what it is like, but it seems to me that it causes sexuals more distress to have this attraction than it does to me by not having it. They seem to loose control over themselves if a 'hot' guy/girl walks by :blink:

I think I'm a little fond of being without sexual attraction, although it makes it harder to find a partner (not my ultimate goal in life, but it would be nice to have somebody).

Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Good luck with spreading the awareness, I hope you still can use new data.

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1. How old are you?

Seventeen :D

2. What country do you live in?

U.S.

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Ahh. That question gets complicated with me. My dad was adopted into Native American culture when he was a teen, my mom is Buddhist, and my step dad is a Tibetan Buddhist Monk refugee. Well, ex-monk, I suppose, sense he is now HERE. I don't give a label to what I believe, and if I were to completely explain it.. It would take way too long. Me and my best friend (she's hardcore Christian) have hour long debates about religion.. It's all very interesting too me. To sum it up though, I guess I adopt more of the grounded pieces of religion, and the spiritual parts, but not so much the 'there is only one God' sort of thing. And I don't believe in any sort of afterlife, or reincarnation.. Well, I believe in reincarnation to an extent. But not the way people normally think of it. *confusion*

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Mostly hetero. Maybe bi. It's difficult for me to tell with the whole asexual thing.. Because I find both sexes very aesthetically pleasing.

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

I'm currently in one. I've been in three others.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

I never really acknowledged it until this summer. I always knew that sexual situations always made me a little uncomfortable, and I could definitely live without them, but I didn't realize that it was just how I am.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Ehh. Apathetic. Masturbation.. It's awkward for me to discuss, or mention, or anything xD haha. But. I don't think there's anything wrong with it. I do it. Sex, though, I don't find disgusting.. I just would rather live without it.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

I've never had sex when I didn't want to, know.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Nope! I'm a little dyslexic though.... :P

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

Hahaha, I HATE scales!! But I suppose I can choose one. Assuming ten is just very high, and NOT full of yourself, I'd say an average of seven. On bad days it gets verrry low.. But sometimes I get delusional and it gets much higher too ^_^

My self esteem used to be rock bottom, and the last couple years have been basically me working on that.. So.. It's a very good thing for me!

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Verbally. Sexually, once. Physically, I can't say I was abused, although I was hit once.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

It doesn't cause me distress.. I might want to change it to TRY and see how I like it :] compared to the fantasticly not-distracting pros of being asexy.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Mm. I just wish that people's reactions weren't always "YOU'RE A PLANT??" and then turn to disbelief.

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1. How old are you?

19

2. What country do you live in?

Canada

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Really a mix of all...I can't identify with a single religion

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

hetero-romantic.

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Yes.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Around 2006...I was 17.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Sex...Indifferent. Masturbation is normal for me. Though recently I've just wanted to fall asleep instead. :P

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Almost. I thought my first ex-girlfriend wanted sex...and she thought I wanted sex...it was a mess! But I am still a virgin.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Depression. Grand Mal Seizures.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Verbally.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

Yes...my friends are sexual and some movies they want me to see...I really don't. I wouldn't want to change. I am glad I don't act on sexual urges. :)

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Not really.

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1. How old are you?

19

2. What country do you live in?

australia

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

christian... but i dont really believe it...

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

gay (im female, but i dont use the word lesbian) or homo

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

no

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

i didnt know there was a word for it, i thought i was not normal. from about when i was 13-14. when everyone else was getting relationships, and i didnt want one

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

im rather meh... dont care either way.. dont talk to me about it, and its all good.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

no, i wanted to do it... i thought it would change things... it didnt

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

hormone imbalance - yes, i used to have seizures (when i was about 13-17) looked like epilepsy, but it wasnt..

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

6-7ish

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

yes

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

not really. i kinda like being different. i wouldnt want to fit in as being the norm....

i wouldnt change. and people can think what they want.. i dont care.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

:)

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  • 1 month later...
GooberPeaAndMe

1. How old are you? 19

2. What country do you live in? USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any? Atheist

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic? Aromantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship? Nope

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual? About a month ago

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)? Very indifferent. Better things to do.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)? No, but I thought about it

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)? Just ADHD

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem? 4-ish

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused? Verbally Yes. Physically it would depend on your definition... I got regular spankings and some threats of worse

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could? Not at all, would never change, so happy to be the way I am

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1. How old are you?

22

2. What country do you live in?

England

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

None; I'm an atheist, although I tried to be a Buddhist aged 13-16

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Hetero- or bi- [haven't worked it out yet]

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Yes, but only one

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

I've known there was something unusual about me sexually since I was about 12, but only came across the term asexuality last year

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Neither act disgusts me but the way sex dominates people's interests depresses me

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Yes, but as it was in a same-sex relationship, it was more 'providing' sex than having sex

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Depression and non-specified psychosis

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

2

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Physically and verbally

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

Yes it causes me distress and I think I would change if I could - but that may only be because the relationship mentioned in #5 was destroyed by it

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

I'm still not knowledgeable enough about asexuality to say anything useful, sorry.

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1. How old are you?

18

2. What country do you live in?

United States

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Generally, I'm an atheist, but I will often identify as Unitarian Universalist.

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Probably bi-romantic.

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No. I was in one brief, very non-serious romantic relationship that did nothing but convince me of my repulsion towards sex.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Well, I've always felt this way, but around 16 or 17 it became painfully obvious that whatever puberty was doing to my peers as far as sexuality, it was pretty much keeping me the same- no sexual desire or drive whatsoever.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I'm a repulsed asexual, so I would be disgusted/horrified if I was personally involved. I am also uncomfortable seeing it or having it insinuated. Regardless, I am not disgusted by the fact that other people do it. Good for them.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I think it would be easier if I was sexual, but I have embraced who I am and how I feel. I might consider changing if I could, but I can't say what my final decision would be. Sorry.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Um... We need more visibility.... okay, I have nothing. Sorry again.

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TheLocalDinosaur

1. How old are you?

17

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christian

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Hetero-Romantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

no

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

I've always been how I am, but when I first heard the term "asexual" was about two months ago. About a year or two before that I noticed I really wasn't into sex at all, compared to my peers.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I'm indifferent. Without sex, I wouldn't be here. I'm not disgusted, I just don't like it personally. I can still get aroused, but it's not directed at anyone in particular.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

no

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Mental, no, but I do have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, though I am on medication.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

Probably a 6.5. Others would say lower, but that's how I feel.

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Sexually a bit in early childhood by another child.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I would not change it even if I was given the opportunity. It can be frustrating because it's hard to explain. I probably confuse people and make them worry about me. But it's only others that I'm concerned about, not myself. I wouldn't change it for the world. ^-^

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

I just wish other people would understand that I'm really no different from them, I just have no desire to have sex. If sex is the crucial factor that most relationships are based on, then I feel sad that many people will never know me for the person I truly am. I hope this helps you. ^-^

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1. How old are you?

19

2. What country do you live in?

Canada

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Agnostic/a fascination with Odinism

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Sometimes hetero, sometimes a-romantic, it swings back and forth

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

For a very long time I thought with horror what I would eventually grow into it, but then when I was sixteen (?) one of my friends mentioned how it was possible to be asexual, and I thought, really? Sweet! And then I found this site when I was seventeen and I decided that if I didn't...turn by the time I was eighteen I would happily accept the adjective of asexual for myself.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Disgusted.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Never.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Well, not diagnosed.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

...3.5

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No for the first two, and not really for the third.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

Being asexual does not cause me distress and I would never want to be sexual.

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1. How old are you?

18

2. What country do you live in?

Australia

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

none

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

hetro

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

18

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

disgusted

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

Yes and yes I would change

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1. How old are you?

22

2. What country do you live in?

United States

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christian

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Hetero

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

no

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

About 6 months ago

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Masturbation I'm fine with but I'm disgusted by sex

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn't want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No never had sex

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Yes Aspergers Syndrome

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

6/7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

No I'm fine with being asexual.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

No final thoughts

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1. How old are you?

46 years old.

2. What country do you live in?

U.S.

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Catholic

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

bi-romantic, more toward straight

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Yes. More than one.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

I have always felt asexual. I did not have a word for my indifference to things sexual, but the feelings of avoidance and indifference were always there.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Indifferent; there are other things I can think of to do that I want to do more. I don't have much of a drive, though I am sexually responsive.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Yes. But it was never a source of bitterness for me. And I seriously hope my attitude did not hurt my late husband's feelings.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?[]

No. But I do wonder why you would ask this question. Asexuality is not a cause or symptom of mental illness.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7-8 maybe. Self-esteem is not a luxury. It's necessary.

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Verbally and emotionally at school and when I was at home.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

It doesn't cause me distress. And no, I wouldn't change it.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Asexuals are far from isolated. Asexuality is an orientation that encompasses more than sexual attraction and concepts of gender. It has to do with how one defines relationships and intimacy. So to get a complete picture of asexuals, it's important to come to know those with whom they are in relationships also.

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1. How old are you?

19

2. What country do you live in?

New Zealand

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christian agnostic

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Bi-romantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Once

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Knew I was different aged 11, sure I was asexual 18.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Fine with other people doing it as long as it doesn't involve me, and I don't have to be exposed to it in any way. Mildly disgusted seeing it on TV, extremely disgusted if I have to see or hear anything pertaining to it in real life.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Severe sexual harassment, (this did not "turn me into" an asexual but possibly contributed to aforementioned feelings of disgust) as well as the normal high school exclusion stuff.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

Wouldn't change as I like the freedom. However I would probably have a better social life if I weren't asexual as I would enjoy bars, clubs and the beach more (I feel uneasy in all those places where someone might try to pick you up).

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Good luck on your research :D

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1. How old are you? 18

2. What country do you live in? United States

3. What religion do you identify with, if any? Raised Catholic, still Christian, have deep respect for other religious traditions

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic? Hetero-romantic, because I can only picture myself having a male partner if I ever have a partner, but I realized I also like girls, too. I mean, I'm not sexually attracted to any gender, but I do find both guys and girls good-looking, in an asexual sort of way. :)

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship? Nope

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual? I always knew I was different because I just wasn't interested like all of my peers, and I was always fine with that, thinking that perhaps I just hadn't grown into it or that since I've never been in a relationship I naturally wouldn't feel sexual attraction, (common incorrect assumptions, as I could explain if you wish, or so could many others and several other threads) and so on. And also for logical and moralistic reasons I've always planned on saving sex until after marriage. But this year (my first year in college) I had the realization I don't plan on ever having sex anyway.... And I found AVEN and the term "asexual". It was a new label for what I already knew.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)? It's not bad. Sex is natural and is not inherently evil. I think our culture has a screwy and unhealthy obsession with it, but sex in and of itself is not bad. However, when I think about personally having sex or anything of the sort, or begin to dwell on the details, I get grossed out. Sex is just a weird and silly idea. :huh:

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)? Nope

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)? Depression; though I can think of lots of evidence to support the fact that I've always been asexual, and that it's not a result of my depression.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem? 8.5

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused? A bit verbally

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could? Not in and of itself. A bit distressed that some people dont' believe that I'm asexual, etc. But I'm happy with myself, and life is fun. :)

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject. Got to go now, but good luck on the paper! And kudos for picking a great topic! ^_^

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1. How old are you?

26

2. What country do you live in?

United States

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

None - Apathetic Agnostic

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

slightly hetero, but mostly aromantic.

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Probably around 5 years ago.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Apathetic towards sex in general, but no qualms with people who enjoy it. Sexual intercourse is very unappealing in my eyes. Masturbation is okay.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No. I've never had sex.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Social Anxiety Disorder (~9 years ago)

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Tho I guess it's the same thing, I'd use the term harassed rather than abused. I was periodically sexually harassed in middle school and early high school.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

Maybe ten years ago, but not now.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Looking back, I can see my desires as something I conjured up so that I could fit in. Now, I see that the desire was never really there.

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AFlyingPiglet

1. How old are you?

36

2. What country do you live in?

England

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Am an active Christian

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

I am trying to work this out at the moment. I am very happy on my own and don't look for romantic relationships as normally I don't feel any romantic attraction, let alone sexual attraction. However, I have had a crush about twice in my life and when it happened, it was a shock to the system - like a bolt out of the blue.

Have had several close friendships where I (or others) would have thought that I "ought" to have at least experienced romantic attraction, but I have not been romantically attracted in the slightest.

Based on this, I would say that I am a-romantic with a dash of hetero.

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

NO - but I have gone through the motions hoping that it would develop into one - see question 8

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

As far back as I remember. I remember being told by grown ups that I would get married, have a family etc and I remember being annoyed at their assumptions and it made me question what I DID want.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I do have a drive (of sorts) that I deal with myself. Am indifferent to the act of sex (but try not to think about it)

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Yes - in a 'relationship' that went on for about 12 months. I went through the motions (1) in the hope that my relational and sexual attraction would 'kick in' AND (2) To 'prove' that I wasn't gay as I knew that others wondered if I was, so I was trying to prove that I was "normal".

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

NO

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

Goes up and down but normally around 7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Yes. And have also worked through a lot of it too with counselling etc.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

NO and NO.

I now realise that this is normal for me and for a lot of other people too. I have always been happy this way and am even happier now that I know that I am not the only one and that Asexual is a legitimate term. Other people have not been at ease about who I am, but that is their problem. I can now explore and grow to be the person that I am with the help of this Community.

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1. How old are you?

23

2. What country do you live in?

Ireland

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christianity

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Hetero

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Serious? No, I'd say not.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

13-ish. I never knew of the actual term "asexual" until I was around 19 though.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Apathetic-ish.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

I never had sex when I didn't want to.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I think about that quiet a bit. I'd say yes on both accounts, by and large. My opinion differs though.

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annwyl_cariad

1. How old are you?

20

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Catholicism

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Biromantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Looking back, I realized I wasn't as into sex as everyone else back in middle school. But I didn't know there was a name for it until I was about 19.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

It's all well and good for other people, and I really don't care what others do. I personally don't masturbate, and I wouldn't have sex except as something to do with a person I cared about who enjoyed it. Kind of like if you don't like soccer, say, but you'll go to a match every once in a while with your partner because they enjoy it.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

8

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

My only distress stems from people not understanding or believing in asexuality and my concerns with finding a life partner who will be accepting. In general I feel okay. I wouldn't change, because then I don't think I'd really still be myself anymore. Plus I'm glad that I don't have this extra "need" that other people seem to have. One less thing to worry about! :)

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1. How old are you?

18

2. What country do you live in?

England

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

None

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Biromantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Yes

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Well I've always been asexual. Just didn'y know the name of it till recently.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I'm not fussed about it. If I never have sex again I will be perfectly happy.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Yes

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

6

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

No

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

It doesn't cause me any distress. As to whether I would change it I'm not really sure. I am who I am I guess.

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The questions are as follows:

1. How old are you?

27

2. What country do you live in?

UK

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christian (protestant)

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

bi-romantic asexual

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Difficult to say, I've mused on this for a while, I was just way into studying at school to think about fancying people that much, I was very anti-everything sex-wise as a teenager, went through an I'm a lesbian phase(s) - um I guess I finally decided I was asexual last year at the age of about 26 ish, but I'd not really heard of it before, when I did however, it just really seemed to fit, it made sense and felt right. I mean I can actually remember when I was 22 telling someone that I wasn't into kissing/etc and I can remember that they didn't really buy it, even now I still have people saying that they think I'm too young to regard myself as asexual. Personally i think that 27 is plenty old enough. My mother accepts it and she knows me very well and would prefer it were otherwise.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I'm disgusted by sex (definitely), I quite like masturbating

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

I've never had sex thankfully

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?[

Not really, I've never undergone any hormonal tests

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

I've been verbally abused, I was bullied a lot at school

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

No, it doesn't cause me any distress, I certainly would not change it if I could; I'm quite happy the way I am

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

I really don't feel that this is something that I've chosen, the whole entity of asexuality as it exists on the internet is something that I stumbled across on the internet last year and when I did it really made sense and seemed to neatly describe who I am. I really feel that this is me, not something that I have chosen/ taken up myself. I feel that I'm on the path that I'm meant to be on and as a Christian I'd probably describe it as a gift and I think I also see it as linked in with celibacy, although I recognize that they are two distinct entities, being asexual clearly makes being celibate infinitely easier.

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For my Advanced Placement Composition and Language class, an assignment is to write an argumentative paper. I chose asexuality as the subject of mine. A good deal of the psychologists and "average Joe"-type people out there seem to be rather skeptical about asexuality, especially viewing it as a sexual orientation. My goal is to argue concise points and get them to agree with my opinion (that it is).

This is a free-response questionaire. Elaboration on any answers will help me with my report; the more detailed you are, the more information I can gather. However, some of these questions contain MATURE CONTENT, and you can feel free to not answer them if they make you uncomfortable. Any answers you give will help me, even if you do not complete the entire survey.

Thanks for anything you guys do to help me. <3

The questions are as follows:

1. How old are you?

20

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

N/A

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

...hetero-romantic. Is up for debate though

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

*scoff* No.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

It was suggested to me by my brother's girlfriend when I was in High School, so about 5 years ago.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I would not personally want to have sex, but it does not bother me if other people choose to, although it does weird me out a bit to think of people I know in sexual situations.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

N/A

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

...7-ish

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Sweetie, anybody who's been through High School has been verbally abused. Other than that, no.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

No. To both questions. To my way of thinking, asexuality comes with a lot fewer complications than almost any other orientation. I mean, I'll probably have to explain myself to my family and friends eventually, but other than that, I see no real issues arising from my orientation. And, after having seen the bullshit that my sexual friends have to put themselves through, I have come to be truly grateful for all the indignities from which I have been spared.

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Umi_No_Tenshi

1. How old are you?

18, going on 19

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christian

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Homo-romantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

This year

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Disgusted

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Depression

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

5

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Yes

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

No, I'm actually very content

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1. How old are you?

16

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christianity

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Hetero

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Kinda sorta... It was short but I still love him so much.

And if all goes well I'll get back together with him -- if you consider that serious I mean.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Just before I turned 15 I think.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I'd like to try it even though I know I won't like it - I just wanna try it because I don't wanna miss out on anything.

But also I'd like to try it for the sake of the one I love. If it makes him happy, then I'm fine with it.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Nope.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Not mental, plenty of Medical, but not Mental.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

7.5/10

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Yeah, but by the kids in my classes, all of them, for about... 10-11 years?

All the kids hurt me in some shape way or form - mostly physically & verbally but I have sexually harassed on more than one occasion but that wasn't until the 7th grade - where the little perverts actually had room to run and hide from me.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I would sometimes like to change because I want to get what exactly is so great about sex - but I just don't.

It doesn't click - it just doesn't and it's killing me! But I like that I'm not sexual as well... That's less of a burden for those who care about me.

They know I won't go out and have sex with some random guy I mean [it's a long story...]

I don't want to tell my parents or anyone else, except my friends, that I'm Asexual because I know it just click in there minds either - the same way I can't understand what's so great about sex, that's the same thing for them as far as it clicking in their minds.

But, to be honest, Asexual or not I think I'd be the same I am now - but if I were sexual I would be deemed "Frigid" which doesn't bother me at all.

So people would still think me odd.

I would like to change it for maybe just a day... Just to what it's like to be sexual.

Except I'm really happy that I'm not like my friends who's lives more or less suck right now because of sex.

So I'm glad I don't have that temptation.

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1. How old are you?

35

2. What country do you live in?

England

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

none

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

hetero-romantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

yes

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

always felt different only discovered asexuality in 07

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

indifferent really

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

yes

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

not officially but have suffered from depression

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

3-4 depending on my mood

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

verbally as a kid while at school

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

no/no

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

no further comments

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1. How old are you? 21

2. What country do you live in? United States

3. What religion do you identify with, if any? Christianity

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic? Hetero

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship? No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual? When I was 18

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)? Disgusted

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)? No

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)? No

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem? 6-7

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused? No

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could? No & never

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject. ...

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Nico-Nico Friendo

1. How old are you?

25

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

None -- Atheist interested in Eastern Philosophy (Taoism, Buddhism, Shintoism, etc.).

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Not sure for certain. I think I'm a-romantic, but someday I may find romance (you just never know). ;)

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

Nope.

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

I started wondering what my sexual orientation was by the end of high school and did not learn about asexuality until some time during college. But I suspected for a long time that I was 'different' from the others of my age and sex when they started dating and stuff and yet I was not interested in those things. When I was a Christian people just thought I was 'saving myself for marriage' - but really I did not want sex outside OR inside a marriage!

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

I sometimes wish sex did not exist, although I am aware that is unreasonable. The existence of sexuality just complicates relationships for me. I feel as if I can't get close to anyone because they might think my affection for them means I want sex from them when I don't. It just creates tension and anxiety. I just want to be comfortable around someone without them reading 'sex' into it.

I dunno. I sex is just one of those things I don't really understand the 'importance' of in other peoples' lives. It confuses me.

As for masturbation, I've tried it out of curiosity, but it's really not that exciting. I guess my brain does not really 'read' the feeling as all that 'pleasurable.' I do not know or understand how other people feel when they do it, only I imagine they feel it quite differently from myself.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Depression that has existed for almost all my life.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

Pretty low. Maybe 1 or 2.

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Physically and verbally.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I just wish everyone else around me was asexual. :P

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

No comments.

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Jillianimal

1. How old are you? 17

2. What country do you live in? U.S.

3. What religion do you identify with, if any? Christianity

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic? Heteroromantic I guess. Haven't had the chance to know for sure

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship? Nope

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual? When I found out about it

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)? Somewhere between apathetic & "disgusted"

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)? Nope, virgin

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)? Yep, bipolar, social anxiety & minor paranoia, though the last 2 have gotten a bit better

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem? 4-6...ish?

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused? Physically but mostly verbally, Though I highly doubt any of it has to do with my orientation if that's why you're asking

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could? Noope. I love being this way

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Uhm.... :cake:

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1. How old are you?

44.

2. What country do you live in?

England.

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

None: I’m atheist, a rationalist and don’t believe in fate.

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Homo-romantic (I use the word “homoaesthete”).

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

I’ve tried (unsuccessfully).

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

Knew I was “different” from the ‘70s, started using the term “asexual” in the mid ‘90s and discovered the existence of other asexual people in 2004.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Am not capable of, and have no interest in sex.

Am capable of what could be described as masturbation and find it an enjoyable if only an occasional activity.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

No.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

No.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

This is variable and context-sensitive but generally about 8.

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

Sexually never; the others not to any significant level.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

No, since I’m accepting of my sexuality and have adapted my lifestyle to suit.

I would not want to change now, even were it possible.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Asexuality is one of the naturally occurring variations in human sexuality, like homosexuality or bisexuality.

That a partner or spouse is necessary for a happy and fulfilled life is a fallacy, despite what society and religions will have people believe.

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Whatsername

1. How old are you?

18

2. What country do you live in?

USA

3. What religion do you identify with, if any?

Christian

4. Do you identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or a-romantic?

Bi-romantic

5. Have you ever been in a serious romantic relationship?

No

6. When did you first start to think you were asexual?

When I was in my early teens, realizing I don't have the sexual drive my peers seem to have. They would talk about sex as though it was this great thing but, frankly, I was bored with it. It didn't interest me.

7. What do you think of sex and masturbation (Disgusted, apathetic, etc.)?

Apathetic to both.

8. Have you ever had sex when you didn’t want to (to sustain a relationship, seem “normal”, etc.)?

Never. And I would not demean myself in such a way.

9. Have you ever been diagnosed with any abnormal mental conditions (Manic depression, hormone imbalances, etc.)?

Atypical depression, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Social Phobia.

10. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being “very high” and 1 being “very low”, how would you rate your self esteem?

2. D:

11. Have you ever been physically, sexually, or verbally abused?

All three, yes, unfortunately.

12. Does it cause you distress being asexual and/or would you change if you could?

I would not change. I'm happy the way I am.

13. Please share any final comments you have on the subject.

Asexuality should be accepted as a true sexuality. It is just as natural as hetero, homo, or bisexual. We are not "weird", "out there", or "dyfunctional." We just lack a sexual drive. There's nothing to be ashamed of and I'm proud to say I'm asexual.

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