Jump to content


Photo

Asexual Vs. Autosexual


  • Please log in to reply
15 replies to this topic

#1 Perplextus

Perplextus

    Junior Member

  • Members
  • 11 posts
  • Location:East Bay, CA
  • A/Sexuality:Asexual or Gray-Asexual

Posted 09 April 2008 - 08:05 AM

So, I've tried coming out to a few friends, and most of them refuse to buy it. I think they can't get amoebas out of their heads, and think I mean that I expect to just "clone myself" or something. But one of them brought up the term "autosexual" after I agreed that I still
Spoiler
(though my ability to fantasize has declined sharply since I admitted to myself that I really wouldn't want to do any of that stuff in real life). I know a lot of people here retain the desire to give themselves pleasure in the genital region, so what do y'all think of the term "autosexual"? I guess it's easier for the sexuals to accept because it doesn't quite imply a *complete* rejection of their way of life, but I don't know. I kinda think "sexuality" implies a desire to copulate with another creature, and asexuality is essentially a lack of this desire. But what are everyone's thoughts?

#2 andrew_w

andrew_w

    Mega Mitosis

  • AVEN Members
  • 294 posts
  • A/Sexuality:Gray-hetero-romantic parasexual asexual

Posted 10 April 2008 - 06:59 AM

So, I've tried coming out to a few friends, and most of them refuse to buy it. I think they can't get amoebas out of their heads, and think I mean that I expect to just "clone myself" or something. But one of them brought up the term "autosexual" after I agreed that I still

Spoiler
(though my ability to fantasize has declined sharply since I admitted to myself that I really wouldn't want to do any of that stuff in real life). I know a lot of people here retain the desire to give themselves pleasure in the genital region, so what do y'all think of the term "autosexual"? I guess it's easier for the sexuals to accept because it doesn't quite imply a *complete* rejection of their way of life, but I don't know. I kinda think "sexuality" implies a desire to copulate with another creature, and asexuality is essentially a lack of this desire. But what are everyone's thoughts?


Lots of asexuals have sex drives, and lots of asexuals masturbate. Asexuality is simply a lack of sexual attraction. It is possible to experience (primary) drive without attraction. Autosexuals are people who are sexually attracted to themselves, not asexuals with a sex drive.

#3 Perplextus

Perplextus

    Junior Member

  • Members
  • 11 posts
  • Location:East Bay, CA
  • A/Sexuality:Asexual or Gray-Asexual

Posted 10 April 2008 - 07:29 AM

Lots of asexuals have sex drives, and lots of asexuals masturbate. Asexuality is simply a lack of sexual attraction. It is possible to experience (primary) drive without attraction. Autosexuals are people who are sexually attracted to themselves, not asexuals with a sex drive.


That was kind of my argument, because masturbation aside, I don't exactly find myself sexually attractive. Like, if I had a clone of myself, I wouldn't "do me". I guess it is pretty gray for me, since I do get aroused by (thinking of or looking at) women, but have no desire for intercourse. The only person I enjoy being sexual with is myself, but I am not aroused simply by myself, there has to be a fantasy. Hmm...maybe I should write Dan Savage?

#4 Olivier

Olivier

    AVENger

  • AVEN Members
  • 3,120 posts
  • Location:Australia
  • A/Sexuality:Sexual

Posted 10 April 2008 - 09:40 AM

The term autosexual is also used to mean those who prefer masturbation over partnered sex (see here for example). I'd say this is a far more common usage than the meaning of one who experiences self-attraction, although both seem to be out there, which is unhelpful.

Using this meaning of austosexual, it would accurately describe the behaviour of an asexual with a sex drive that they prefer to deal with through masturbation.

#5 DaniTheGirl

DaniTheGirl

    Asexy

  • Members
  • 497 posts
  • Location:Inside my head, mostly
  • A/Sexuality:Asexy

Posted 10 April 2008 - 04:48 PM

The term I use in my own head to describe myself is "Bi-semi-romantic autoerotic asexual." Although I, too, have experienced a decline in my desire to masturbate/ability to orgasm since admitting I don't want to have "real" sex.

Hmm...maybe I should write Dan Savage?

YES

just another good vibration

Posted Image


#6 SarielLunar

SarielLunar

    Newbie

  • Members
  • 1 posts
  • Location:San Antonio, TX

Posted 10 April 2008 - 05:25 PM

This is the same problem I have. I do ...uh... masterbate. (GOD that was hard to admit!) But I cannot have sex with someone. I have tried and I'm never turned on or I get physically sick(a bit insulting to my partner). I'm still a virgin because of it and I don't really mind. I do crave affection like hugs mostly but nothing else. Some guys have tried to go farther and I have to punch them so they get the message that I don't like it! The last time I kissed a guy(I'd just turned 25) I got really grossed out which was confusing. The last kiss I'd had before him was when I was sixteen and I loved it. So it good to hear that I'm not the only person that feels like this.

#7 Shockwave

Shockwave

    Old Fogey

  • AVEN Members
  • 8,846 posts
  • Location:Portland, Oregon.
  • A/Sexuality:Metro-asexual.

Posted 10 April 2008 - 07:00 PM

In this context "autosexual" describes sexual behavior, whereas "asexual" describes sexual orientation. Big difference.

#8 spinneret

spinneret

    AVENator

  • AVEN Members
  • 3,666 posts
  • A/Sexuality:just call me queer

Posted 11 April 2008 - 03:42 AM

Well put, Shockwave.
The real secret of life is that everyone else is just faking it, too. spinneret the explainneret! (as dubbed by the dela)
Posted Image Apositive, the new site for asexual discourse

#9 andrew_w

andrew_w

    Mega Mitosis

  • AVEN Members
  • 294 posts
  • A/Sexuality:Gray-hetero-romantic parasexual asexual

Posted 12 April 2008 - 06:00 AM

If you're using "autosexual" to describe behavior, it is still incorrect to describe an asexual who masturbates as autosexual. You could describe their behavior as autosexual or autoerotic, but I don't think that it would make sense to describe the person as autosexual. Orientation is defined by attraction, not behavior. If you want to call an asexual who masturbates autosexual, then an asexual who has sex should be called sexual.

#10 DaniTheGirl

DaniTheGirl

    Asexy

  • Members
  • 497 posts
  • Location:Inside my head, mostly
  • A/Sexuality:Asexy

Posted 12 April 2008 - 08:19 PM

In this context "autosexual" describes sexual behavior, whereas "asexual" describes sexual orientation. Big difference.

:nod:
That's why I call myself an autoerotic asexual
  • AlieFlora likes this

just another good vibration

Posted Image


#11 Sally

Sally

    Cakemaster

  • AVEN Members
  • 24,101 posts
  • Location:Seattle
  • A/Sexuality:old asexual

Posted 02 February 2010 - 09:45 PM

Since some asexuals and some sexuals masturbate, why invent a new term for it? Just use masturbate. Otherwise, more term confusion, since a sexual can also be an autosexual if they masturbate, but an asexual wouldn't if they didn't masturbate.

Keep it simple and if you individually need to go on for pages to someone you're trying to explain yourself to, then do it individually. I just can't see why you would, since most people aren't that interested.

As possibly the oldest person on this forum, no, I saw no mention of autosexuality in anything I heard or read or talked about since 1985 or before 1985.

I don't have the energy to do PMs.


#12 ily

ily

    A-Grade AVENite

  • AVEN Members
  • 4,708 posts
  • Gender:do not want
  • Location:California
  • A/Sexuality:Asexual

Posted 02 February 2010 - 10:08 PM

Autosexuality isn't a new term. In 1977, there was an article about "Asexual and Autoerotic Women". I agree that it was never a household name, but apparently people studying sexuality were using it.

asexy beast, the blog (archives)

adventures in unemployment, the zine

"I was chaste to the point of rudeness."--Hippolytus


#13 Pandoren

Pandoren

    AVENger

  • AVEN Members
  • 3,271 posts
  • Gender:Agender/Genderless
  • Location:Can Town
  • A/Sexuality:Aromantic asexual

Posted 02 February 2010 - 10:31 PM

In any case, if one wanted to use terms Asexual = someone who doesn't masturbate and Autosexual = someone who does masturbate, I'll be damned if I'm going to have my orientation defined on whether or not I masturbate. It's a label that means I might as well shout "I touch myself!" to anyone who asks.

"Voulez-vous entrer un relation platonique avec moi?" probably just wouldn't work. ~Slavaa
"You know you are asexual when a hot night means an air conditioner failure" ~ApolloSeek


#14 Sally

Sally

    Cakemaster

  • AVEN Members
  • 24,101 posts
  • Location:Seattle
  • A/Sexuality:old asexual

Posted 02 February 2010 - 10:50 PM

Autosexuality isn't a new term. In 1977, there was an article about "Asexual and Autoerotic Women". I agree that it was never a household name, but apparently people studying sexuality were using it.


We (the general public) read of the term "autoerotic", that the OP was asking about autosexual.

I don't have the energy to do PMs.


#15 ily

ily

    A-Grade AVENite

  • AVEN Members
  • 4,708 posts
  • Gender:do not want
  • Location:California
  • A/Sexuality:Asexual

Posted 02 February 2010 - 11:00 PM

Ah, I see. Certainly the two concepts are closely related, though?

asexy beast, the blog (archives)

adventures in unemployment, the zine

"I was chaste to the point of rudeness."--Hippolytus


#16 Ocelot

Ocelot

    Too Asexy for this Site

  • Banned
  • 782 posts
  • Location:Massachusetts, USA
  • A/Sexuality:Apathetic asexual

Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:06 AM

Technically "autosexual" refers to someone who is sexually attracted to him/herself. I'd direct you to the Wikipedia article on autosexuality, but some asshole changed it so it redirects to the article on masturbation, thus making the original article inaccessible.

Life's too short to be cool. Be a nerd.





0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users