steveloveswwe Posted September 19, 2007 Share Posted September 19, 2007 After breaking up with my last boyfriend I have decided to only date asexuals. The problems with our difference in sex preference were just too much to reconcile. I don't want to go through that again. I would love to have an asexual boyfriend I can be myself with.. with no worries about sex.. but I don't know where to find any guys that are asexual. Everywhere I look there are guys trying to have sex. I looked at the asexual dating sites and most of them were down and no one really uses them. Does anyone have any advice? past experiences? Or if any intelligent guys are reading this (between 20-27) feel free to PM me :) a true asexual is a person who has NO desire in anyone including male or female or anything like sex Link to post Share on other sites
steveloveswwe Posted September 19, 2007 Share Posted September 19, 2007 After breaking up with my last boyfriend I have decided to only date asexuals. The problems with our difference in sex preference were just too much to reconcile. I don't want to go through that again. I would love to have an asexual boyfriend I can be myself with.. with no worries about sex.. but I don't know where to find any guys that are asexual. Everywhere I look there are guys trying to have sex. I looked at the asexual dating sites and most of them were down and no one really uses them. Does anyone have any advice? past experiences? Or if any intelligent guys are reading this (between 20-27) feel free to PM me :) the true asexual is a person who does have any desire to anything including boys girls and sex Link to post Share on other sites
l'héros Posted September 19, 2007 Share Posted September 19, 2007 a true asexual is a person who has NO desire in anyone including male or female or anything like sex thank you ô wise, all knowing one for clearing that one up for us. i guess that means im just someone who doesn't want sex... which is, coincidentally, just like the founder of this website. Hrmm, what to call myself now that "asexual" is unacceptable... I've always been fond of the word bagel... Link to post Share on other sites
ghosts Posted September 19, 2007 Share Posted September 19, 2007 steveloveswwe, For future reference, please do not double post, even if the wording is slightly different. -ghosts, Asexual Relationships Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
bbctv Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 i guess i sort of qualify, but in general i don't do relationships, but regrettably it seems that there are more female asexuals than male ones. (as a male asexual who also typically finds most male's attitudes towards women and sex disgusting i have a very hard time figuring out how ALL women are not asexual.) best wishes to you, and since you're from jersey, could you explain what the meaning behind the big neon sign in trenton that says "trenton makes, the world takes" is? i'm guessing it's some boast to manufacturing capacity, but i was under the impression that the US was pretty much de-industrialized, all manufacturing having been exported to the PRC. Link to post Share on other sites
MattPL Posted September 26, 2007 Share Posted September 26, 2007 Well, I'd say it probably isn't easy to find an asexual guy who lives close to you thats in your age range being that there just aren't many asexuals and most of them aren't guys. On a related subject I'm a 21 year old male Asexual Rutgers student from New Jersey. Link to post Share on other sites
firebird8 Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 Welcome, Matt! Link to post Share on other sites
reverse_thrust Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 I tend to prefer the idea of a "set," as in my experience the only thing that differentiates friendship and a relationship is the sex, so naturally a "girlfriend" or "boyfriend" would just be a very close friend for asexuals. At least, that's what I think. I realize it says I'm looking for friends in my profile, but it's less an active search and more of an I-wouldn't-mind sort of thing. Looking for friends is kind of creepy. The exception is the internet, as typically people don't have their interests and personality written across their face when you meet them, though that would be convenient. I never did understand the mindset of dating complete strangers. The attraction must be purely physical, right? Is that a good way to start a relationship? That was a slightly unrelated tangent. I suppose my short response is I don't particularly care one way or another. Link to post Share on other sites
BleedingThrough Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 It's really hard to find another asexual person to be with. People are so sex obsessed. I always have horny men trying to talk to me on the train. It's sick. Link to post Share on other sites
z80 Posted October 2, 2007 Share Posted October 2, 2007 As A guy the reaction I have had from my girl friends when I push away their sexual advances are just priceless. I guess girls are used of getting sex when ever they want it. I guess I'm a bit evil in that respect, but it is funny in a way. The way they just sit there in complete disbelief about what has just happened. Link to post Share on other sites
Tool1989 Posted October 2, 2007 Share Posted October 2, 2007 But do they have to be asexual? Link to post Share on other sites
l'héros Posted October 2, 2007 Share Posted October 2, 2007 But do they have to be asexual? I think it is probably easier to know that they are. I don't know how to approach the subject if it came up, without hurting the other person or feeling as if I were denying them something. Not saying an asexual/sexual relationship couldn't work, I just don't want people that i love to have to sacrifice something they enjoy for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Kassil Posted October 10, 2007 Share Posted October 10, 2007 Heh. The irony, of course, is that As seems to be largely clustered in a handful of areas, and otherwise sparsely scattered, but this is merely an illusion. Most people still haven't even heard of asexuality, and the response usually gotten, in my experience, ranges from some pathetic attempt at wit by asking if I split like an amoeba (which I have to wonder about, given that I've been reported as having been seen all over the country in places I definitely am not) to disparaging remarks about how I'm obviously still recovering from my last relationship, or how I just need to find the right person. Is it really any wonder that, the few others I've introduced to asexuality who realized it suits them as a concept, were thinking they were broken/alone up until that point? Not really. Only a few people who've known me for years recognize that I am distinctly asexual. 26 years of living, and people still think that the fact that I'm a male defines everything about me. Even if I do seem to be somewhat gender-neutral, mentally. Summation: I agree. A relationship with another asexual would be a nice change of pace - not the least because I might get some relief from the oversexed female I work with who seems to take my asexuality as a challenge. Gragh. Link to post Share on other sites
Kallan Posted October 10, 2007 Share Posted October 10, 2007 Well, I'd say it probably isn't easy to find an asexual guy who lives close to you thats in your age range being that there just aren't many asexuals and most of them aren't guys. My experience Gender wise has been about 50/50 Link to post Share on other sites
cijay Posted October 12, 2007 Share Posted October 12, 2007 But do they have to be asexual? To put it directly, because I don't want to be expected to fuck her or have her all over me in public, I think it's rude. Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Meeeee tooooooooooooo.Sorry I can't offer experiences, but I totally know where you're coming from. It's hard to relax in a relationship when you feel that constant, steady move towards sex. EXACTLY! *SHUDDER!* Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 After breaking up with my last boyfriend I have decided to only date asexuals. The problems with our difference in sex preference were just too much to reconcile. I don't want to go through that again. I would love to have an asexual boyfriend I can be myself with.. with no worries about sex.. but I don't know where to find any guys that are asexual. Everywhere I look there are guys trying to have sex. I looked at the asexual dating sites and most of them were down and no one really uses them. Does anyone have any advice? past experiences? Or if any intelligent guys are reading this (between 20-27) feel free to PM me :) ME TOO! Except with me it'd have to be between 26 and 28. But , what I've been wondering for some time now, is there ANY hope for ANY of us AT ALL? Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Hey... when yah find one, find out if he has an older brother, will yah? LOL! :lol: :lol: :lol: WOOT! AGREED! lol! :lol: :lol: :lol: Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 gee, about 0.66% A-girls, 0.33% A-boys. what r the odds? You'd think this would make it easier for me to find an A-girlfriend. Seriously, we need to all start wearing like, wristbands or something cause I would be thrilled if there was an asexual girl at my university. I really, really doubt that though. YES! I actually wished we could ALL like tag ourselves so we could find each other easier. But then i looked on like the MAP thing, and found out no one lives near me anyway. *SNIFF!* :( :lol: Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 I'd love to have a boyfriend that didn't try to grope me the moment we were alone :( Ditto. Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 I want someone who will be with me romantically as I am and I'm beginning to think that long-term sexless romantic relationships with sexuals aren't possible for me. I guess that means I want an asexual boyfriend, too! Of course, I am okay with a sexual one as long as there isn't any sex!! Took the thought right outta my head! lol. Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Me too! That was the only negative part of accepting my sexuality and my true desire for a sexless marriage. I feel like I have virtually no hope. True. Very True. *sad sigh!* Yes, we should wear wristbands. I like that idea. I'm also bugging the counseling center at my university for not offering any support for asexuals (they have a "coming out" pamphlet for LGBT, but no mention of A). Maybe they can get a group going - there should be around 200 on my campus... MAN! 200 A-Sexuals!? DUDE! I Envy you! Lucky! Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Ladies, Ladies, It'll all be alright when I tell my girlfriend I'm A in a few months and she dumps me. If you could just all form a cue I'll date all of you.(because I really am that good looking and great, Honest) *SHUDDER!* If you're anything like your Avatar I don't think so. *SHUDDER!* Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 If that queue gets a bit long, there's a shorter one over here with no waiting time. Yeah, you seem okay. Maybe. You a democrat? *salivates* lol! :-D Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 If that queue gets a bit long, there's a shorter one over here with no waiting time. and one that's never been formed here. Cool. I read your Profile. I'm a bit bitter and angry too. And have turned Atheist myself. Nice to meet you. :-D lol. Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 If that queue gets a bit long, there's a shorter one over here with no waiting time. and one that's never been formed here. And my line has people running the other way just so they don't accidently get mistaken for being in it. I don't think I'd mind being mistaken for being in your line. ... Though, I don't know. *looks around nervously!* Link to post Share on other sites
violeteyedsoul Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 Well, I know I've posted to much already and I'm sorry for that. I just want to post one last thing. I'm looking also. Male, or Preferably Female. Just someone I can get along with. Must be a Democrat. And that's about it. Well, that and AROUND my age, 27. Well, ladies? (or guys) Here I am! No Waiting! lol! :-D Link to post Share on other sites
cdraines1959 Posted October 21, 2007 Share Posted October 21, 2007 if you find one, see if he has a brother.............. Link to post Share on other sites
newgirl Posted October 22, 2007 Share Posted October 22, 2007 if you find one, see if he has a brother.............. ditto :lol: Link to post Share on other sites
Nugan Posted October 22, 2007 Share Posted October 22, 2007 But , what I've been wondering for some time now, is there ANY hope for ANY of us AT ALL? No, none whatsoever. Ok, maybe a little bit, but the evidence available suggests that if you find another asexual and form a relationship, you will both gradually realize that you are sexual, begin having intercourse regularly, and leave the site. Link to post Share on other sites
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