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well this question isn't about asexuality, it's about the sexuals

but earlier today on my televisiola i was watching an absolutely horrible-delightful teen sex romp film from the 70's and both the group of boys and girls in this film, kept having bonding moments revolving around sexuality, the group of boys bragging to each other, or saying who they like and consoling each other, and even the girls which is often portrayed slightly less, had a get-together in the one girls basement where they secretly drank, and sort of were mean to each other(what's with the under current of bitchiness(to each other) amongst a group of females sometimes?)but still talk and giggle to each other about boys and sex.

now even though this was a horrible movie, i know this goes on in real life, and part of me thinks you're(sexuals) all total frickin' pervs, part of me thinks it looks nice to bond with people in that manner and unless i talk romantically or esthetically about someone(and even then i'd have to exaggerate and still feel a little weird), i can never do that

why do sexuals 'bond' over this?...it's something they all do you'll say...well ok but almost everyone(and this transcends sexuals.vs, asexuals) eats and sleeps, but that is much less talked about, and people rarely connect over that. What's with this laughing, pat on the back, hi-five, "today you have become a women,my sister" attitude regarding sex, hmmmmmmm?

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I dunno about this bonding over sex business, I find bonding with my friends over really embarrasing things we've done is both effective and very funny!

The thing about girls being bitchy to their friends is something that really bothers me, it certainly isn't something I do, or my close friends, but it's something I've seen done to others and experienced being done to me. It generally seems to be precipitated by some belief on the part of the other girl that either you are after "her man" or the man she's chasing; or that the man she's chasing is interested in you rather than her. This all seems a bit pointless and sometimes I wonder if part of the reason it happens is because of our silly culture that people have to get into opposite sex pairs and compete for partners etc. This bitchy behaviour is portrayed on TV, in films and magazines etc and I think it would be better if they portrayed more girls bonding and showing a bit of loyalty to their friends instead of being divided and competitive all the time *rant rant rant*

I'll shut up now

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Eh, well, ya bond about what you have in common. Sexuals have sex in common, so it provides a safe, familiar topic to come back to when you've got nothing better to say.

I find that, when conversation runs out, I bring discussion back to whatever I share in common with my conversational partner, whatever we both have opinions about. Sex is something LOTS of people have very strong opinions about. And it's generally light, superficial conversation.

We AVENites bond over sex, also, just in the negative. Dealing with the sexualization of the world is something we all have in common, so it's something we're bound to come back to.

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guardianoftheblind

I disagree, I don't think such sexual bonding occurs in that fashion as often as most people are led to believe. Some folks give a very inaccurate picture of how sexual people behave as a whole, entertainment and the media are especially good at this. Not every person with a sex drive walks around with sex on their mind and an erection 24/7. Not every person with a sex drive views sex in a lax all-encompassing achievement-oriented manner. And I'm very confident I'm not the only sexual person who doesn't brag about or share my sexual feelings and experiences to everyone I know. What's the percentage of sexuals who behave as depicted in that film? I don't know. But I know it's not everyone, and I believe it's probably not as many as you think.

This may come as a shock, but some sexual people respect sex. They don't brag about getting some, they don't try to get into the pants of every attractive person they see, and they don't base their friendships on discussing sexual adventures. They bond over conversations and experiences and feelings that have nothing to do with sex. And again, the number of sexuals like that is probably much higher than you believe.

One thing I have observed though is a considerable number of people joke about sex. I have made humorous comments about sex, and many AVEN members have made humorous comments about sex too. Maybe more people than you realize agree that some things about sexuality are weird and silly. I'm personally amused by the synonyms we have for sex; nail, hammer, and screw. Do people have some sort of construction or toolshop fetish? :D

There are definitely perverts, pigs, and sluts out there. They are highly visible and recognized in the media. That's a problem for both sexuals and asexuals. I observe from AVEN that some asexuals have negative feelings towards sexuals as a whole, which I think is just as unhealthy as sexuals having negative feelings towards asexuals as a whole. And for sexuals, the images they see in such movies of pervs pigs and sluts send a false message that they are expected to behave that way to solidify their sexuality. Especially for young adults, I think some believe they have to act a certain way about sex to be a real man or woman. Some people are pervs pigs and sluts because they think that's how they have to be in order to be cool or normal or accepted or sexy.

Some sexual people do indeed compete for partners. Some people are cruel and manipulative to get who they want, and some people engage in fistfights to get who they want. I've been jealous of others and desired to be in their situation, but I don't compete like that.

It would be really great if entertainment outlets had more accurate and complete representations of how people behave.

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What's with this laughing, pat on the back, hi-five, "today you have become a women,my sister" attitude regarding sex, hmmmmmmm?

The hell I'd know. :? :? Fuck that. :evil:

I'm personally amused by the synonyms we have for sex; nail, hammer, and screw. Do people have some sort of construction or toolshop fetish?

I don't remember this moment, but aren't nuts called females and bolts male? I remember seeing something like that at Lowe's before :lol: , and I assumed that's where the term "screwed" must of come from. Strange that people have fetishes with trivial matters

:?

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From the point of view of someone stuck in high school, there is a lot of pressure to be sexually active. One of my friends got a girlfriend he hated just so the guys wouldn't think he "was a queer." People who are single are constantly complaining, and people who are in a relationship just make out everywhere. Yes, there are people who bond over sex and such, of both genders. It's very annoying. But they aren't the majority, they are just the most outspoken, and the ones who sort of force this way of thinking onto others. I have plenty of sexual friends who I've never heard discuss sex in their lives. But we are all guilty of laughing at double entendres and the like, heh. :P

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Live R Perfect

I don't remember this moment' date=' but aren't nuts called females and bolts male? I remember seeing something like that at Lowe's before :lol: , and I assumed that's where the term "screwed" must of come from. Strange that people have fetishes with trivial matters

:?[/quote']

Yeah therer are loads of mechanical and electrical components that are tagged the 'male' and 'female' parts. It's all very sexual isn't it? Maybe thats why men love DIY so much...

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LOL! Perhaps you're right, Liverlicker!

Cate

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What about demolition people with "BANG"? :?

I don't know what all the fuss over sex is about, and how people see it as bonding. If I was ever in a room full of "bonding" people, they would know real fast that I am asexual because I will not be able to keep my laughter down.

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