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How do you cope with anxiety?


Yatogami

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I do a lot of Tai Chi breathing, which really helps the smaller anxiety attacks. If it gets really built up then exercise really helps me. In fact exercise really helps period. If I exercise frequently (like 3 times a week) I can head off a lot of my anxiety. 

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1 hour ago, vmdraco said:

What I mean is that we tend to take anxiety to heart, and I think therapists teach you this method so that we can practice not making emotional judgements based on anxiety when we don't have all the facts.  When you have anxiety, it may be constant or it's related to a situation or past event, and the brain does this as a defense mechanism.  It's a response to trauma that our brain developed on its own to keep us safe, to remind us that we can't keep our guard down, when all it's doing is shielding us from certain situations that are really not that big of a deal.  Our emotions tell us THIS IS BAD THIS IS BAD I'M NOT OKAY WE'RE GOING TO DIE, when it's actually irrational and unrealistic.  I don't say this as a way to brush off people's problems as if they are not real or that they're ridiculous for feeling anxiety in the moment, because it is scary and awful.  However, 9 times out of 10, the anxiety is usually wrong.  Once a situation happens while we're anxious, you realize what you freaked yourself out over wasn't that bad after all.  I know everyone is different, but I do know this happens to me all the goddamn time and yet my brain still goes into freak-out mode.

 

I'll give an example: just yesterday one of my final art pieces was due; it was an accordion booklet, and I only did one side because I thought that was expected.  Walk into class and saw everyone open theirs, and BOTH sides of theirs were completed.  I take my art very seriously, and to see almost everyone in the class have both sides done whilst mine wasn't made my stomach drop.  My racing thoughts were: "oh my god, my work isn't finished, I'm turning in an incomplete final" (I wasn't, I went in knowing it was complete), "I'm going to fail the course", "I'm the ONLY ONE who didn't follow directions, did I miss something on the assignment sheet?" and, "I'm going to get destroyed during crit".

 

I recognized in the middle of this attack that what I was feeling was extreme anxiety about a situation before the critique even occurred.  It didn't make the anxiety go away, but I did recognize what was happening and knew that my emotional response was irrational and not based on reality because I assumed it would be negative.  I went back in after breaking down and fiddled with a sheet of paper to calm myself down.  And by the time they got to my piece, NONE OF THE FOLLOWING OCCURRED.  I psyched myself out for nothing!  No one mentioned it during critique, I got a lot of positive feedback on my book, and one or two other people had only one side done, too. 

 

That's what I mean.  I understood that my brain jumped to conclusions too soon, too fast, and I preconceived a response when I didn't rationalist it first hand.  Once I knew that was going on, I acknowledging this pattern, faced the situation despite that, and realized that my anxiety was being a total fuckwit as usual.  It doesn't make them go away permanently, but it helps manage them when you can't really control them.

 

Sorry for the essay, hope this helps somehow :)      

I do this with everything I do that I have not done before. I'll sit there and think about everything going wrong, or me fucking up and embarrassing myself. 99.9% of the time nothing happens.

 

If I can't follow my schedule, I get anxiety. If something unexpected happened, no matter how minor, I'd get anxiety. If someone is trying to talk to me when I am trying to focus on something, I get anxiety. Someone holds me up, or something holds me up when I need to do something/be somewhere. I get anxiety. My anxiety makes me horribly irritated, snappy, and tense. I seem need absolute control, no surprises, and everything done right to even feel any kind of calm. Which is practically impossible. 

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I forgot earlier but I also have a panic room in my closet. I bought one of those bed cushions and covered it with a sheet on the floor of my closet. I put extra pillows and blankets in there, and one of those push lights. I've only actually crawled in there twice, bit knowing it exists is really helpful for my brain. I also have a whole shelf of fidget toys, things that stimulate your senses in order to distract me.

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I don't cope, I medicate. However I have found belly breathing to be a very useful tool in regaining control.

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I remember what anxiety used to feel like in the past and how I used to deal with it. If I was anxious about going somewhere, or doing something, anything at all, I would backtrack by asking myself where the anxiety was coming from and for what reason. Whatever answer I got, I would then find a counter reason against it, and ultimately settle on the fact that here and now, my anxiety didn't matter, the bigger picture or task at hand was more important.

 

In 75 years, it would be unlikely that I would remember the present moment, rendering my anxiety at that point in time meaningless. After I was dead, no living thing or even myself would remember that moment at all, further nullifying that moment of stress to a completely pointless time waster on my part. I don't get paid to be stressed. I exist here for my own reasons, and I have a limited amount of time to live for those reasons. My time is valuable and shouldn't be wasted on trivialties or falsely founded notions that cause distress.

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I often listen to piano music. I find it rather soothing and happy  and that calms me down. I do like to leap around my room and dance too, as it takes my mind away from what I'm worrying about.

 

Also, vocaloid and j-pop. 

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On 12/15/2017 at 9:51 AM, flagsforhippos said:

Any titles that you could recommend, please?

Feel-good children's books

  • The princess academy by Shannon Hale (slight magic happenings in an old-fashioned world)
  • The Princess Frog + series by Baker (magic character in magic world with magical creatures, lots of magic, very cute)
  • Island of the Aunts by Ibbotson (fantasy creatures in real world)
  • Deltora Quest + sequel series by Emily Rodda (fantasy creatures in fantasy world, quest based)
  • Rowan series by Emily Rodda (fantasy creatures in fantasy world, quest based)
  • Alcatraz vs the Evil Librarians + series (humorous, magical characters in the real world)
  • Juliet Dove Queen of Love by Bruce Coville (humorous, magical artifacts, real world)
  • Circle of Magic + continued series by Tamora Pierce (magical characters and magical plot in a heavily magic world, characters and plot ages over series)
  • Fairy Realm series by Emily Rodda (fantasy creatures in fantasy world, cute)
  • A-Z mysteries (very young targeted audience, fun, children solving mysteries in the real world)
  • Magic tree house (very young targeted audience, educational, children time travel journeys)
  • Every Soul a Star by Wendy Mass (children in the real world learning about life)

I find books to be a wonderful distraction.  These are just some children's titles I found fun to read off the top of my head.  Personally I find more complicated plots aimed at an older target audience a better distraction.  However, there is merit in the fun of children's stories.

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