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Hi, nervous noob.


boojae21

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Hi there.  I've spent the entire day today researching asexuality and all the types and I believe I've come to the conclusions that I'm a Gray-Ace. autochorissexual, and maybe demisexual?  Hence the gray.  I haven't ever fallen in love so I just don't know if I'm demi or not.  Is everyone always this confused when they start the journey?  If anyone has helpful hints or if there's just someone out there I can talk to, I'd love it.  Pretty sure I'm not aromantic. 

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hi fellow florida. there's cake or something? idk... i don't work here. it can be confusing but doesn't have to me. chat is kinda dead rn but there's usually people to talk to there.. idk why i'm in the forums tbh. 

 

*found the cake :cake:*

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Florida!  Yay!  I felt so very alone.  I didn't even know this site had a chat, that's how very noob I am.

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Welcome :cake:. I'm a noob too, so I think I'm doing this right. I get what you said about being new and confused about asexuality, but eventually everything will make sense. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to talk to me about anything.

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Welcome Boo,

It is easy to feel overwhelmed by the amount of classifications and labels. Confusion is a natural reaction to being inundated with information. Moreover, a journey is described as long and difficult. It is stressful to attempt to complete in one night.

 

You ask some tough questions and I do not have answers, but more questions (sry).

  • Why is it necessary to fall in love to determine if a person is demisexual?
  • Does a person need to have sex to know they are asexual?

Feel free to message me and chat (P.S. I was not aware of the chat feature either, lol).

Cheers, J

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Lucas Monteiro
29 minutes ago, Tyro said:

Does a person need to have sex to know they are asexual?

Interesting your question, and this question have been asked around here at AVEN lots of times. But as like other answers in some topics said, we have an amazing complexity that can help us to find this answers and this one is the brain, we have an really extreme powerful mind, we can almost visualize what we plan do to and because of that, we may already know without doing sex if we would like or not. The thing is, if you imagine yourself having sex with someone and you enjoy or think you would enjoy, there is some chances that you are not asexual or at least not close to the full spectrum, so you could be gray-ace. I never did sex, but I can almost say for sure that I am asexual. Anyway, I still think it's an great question and has a lot of to think about it, because of that, other people will still ask the same. 

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41 minutes ago, Lucas Monteiro said:

Interesting your question, and this question have been asked around here at AVEN lots of times. But as like other answers in some topics said, we have an amazing complexity that can help us to find this answers and this one is the brain, we have an really extreme powerful mind, we can almost visualize what we plan do to and because of that, we may already know without doing sex if we would like or not. The thing is, if you imagine yourself having sex with someone and you enjoy or think you would enjoy, there is some chances that you are not asexual or at least not close to the full spectrum, so you could be gray-ace. I never did sex, but I can almost say for sure that I am asexual. Anyway, I still think it's an great question and has a lot of to think about it, because of that, other people will still ask the same. 

I imagine the question has been asked a lot, since it’s been indirectly posed by sexual people as some variation of, “You won’t know if you like it, till you’ve tried it.”

 

Anyways, I wanted to know why Boo has created the prerequisite of “falling in love” to confirm his orientation. Let’s say a person envisions sharing a strong, emotional connection with a future, lifelong partner. Does seeking that desired outcome provide enough evidence to support a demisexual orientation or do you have to be in that relationship to confirm the orientation?

 

I don’t think you have to experience something to validate a belief, which goes along with the “extremely powerful mind” and how, “we can almost visual what we plan to do” and determine if we would enjoy something without having to engage in it first.

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Welcome! As @Tyro and @Lucas Monteiro have said, you don't need experience to understand whether or not you want sex. It's like knowing that you're not a fan of snakes without meeting one in real life. Quite a few people like snakes, but they just don't appeal to you. You don't have to meet a snake up close in person. There's pictures, videos, and stories yo give you a good idea of what snakes are like.

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Hello there, and welcome to AVEN! :cake:

As part of my welcome to you, I'd like to point out some important threads that might be helpful in your first few days here. :) The Terms of Service is here. We recommend you read it over, and if you have any questions please don't hesitate to send either myself or any other administrator or moderator (the "admod" team, as we're called) a message.  Also, there's a handy forum called Site Info, which has some useful information including a thread outlining who moderates which forum. If you ever need something done in or have questions about a specific forum, please message the mod of that forum. And if you have problems with the site in general, or any single member, please message any admod. 

The following are also nifty links to take a look at:  Welcome Lounge Mini Manual | Welcoming 101 | Quick Guide to the Forums | Asexuality FAQ's

 Again, welcome to AVEN and I hope your stay is everything you hoped!

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