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Friends Realizing Demisexuality


Galactic Turtle

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Galactic Turtle

Hello humans. ^_^

 

This might sound like.... REALLY odd. I'm aro-ace. I only knew the words to describe this lifelong feeling about... two years ago. It's not something I talk about with people. I told my parents and that's really it. To one of my close friends I think she suspects it but has never addressed me as such because I've never used the words in front of her. To me if you're aro-ace there's really not much to talk about. You just kinda... keep on doing what you're doing with at least a little bit of knowledge that you're not crazy or whatever.

 

The close friend of mine who most likely suspects my ace-ness told me last week that in a group chat she's in with two of her other friends (I hangout with them pretty frequently too but we only do when brought together by my close friend) had a big conversation about self discovery in relation to this fan fic featuring a demisexual character that she had sent me earlier (I read it, it was your typical slow burn with maybe two sentences allocated to letting us know the character was demi). Anywho, apparently these two other girls really related to it and now identify as demisexual.

 

Because of this my close friend hesitantly suggested that maybe I could talk to them about it but I'm not really sure if that's useful in any way. I know demisexuality is closer to what I am than my heterosexual close friend, but at the same time I don't know much about the gray area as it seems to encompass so much from what I've seen written around here. Also it has only been a week. What if they change their minds? I don't want them to think I'm a freak or something. Like I've said, we've never met up without my close friend arranging it. I've also never really talked face to face with anybody about the way I am and had the result be a good one.

 

I guess my question is, if anyone is demi/gray here, what you'd like to hear if a person in your larger friendship group was aro-ace? Would you think they're similar to you or does the concept sound strange? They still date. They're still very lovable, tactile people. I think they're really nice in general. When the four of us talk together I usually stay quiet most of the time because I like listening to them talk to my close friend. Am I overthinking all of this? 

 

Sorry if this sounds dumb....

 

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If they're open enough to understand demisexuality then maybe if you explain it to them, and find an interesting story to show to them that covers it well then you could get some ace-spec buddies!  I think that ts a great opportunity to come out to them if you feel like it. :) In the end the choice is yours, good luck!

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Galactic Turtle
28 minutes ago, Lichley said:

If they're open enough to understand demisexuality then maybe if you explain it to them, and find an interesting story to show to them that covers it well then you could get some ace-spec buddies!  I think that ts a great opportunity to come out to them if you feel like it. :) In the end the choice is yours, good luck!

Hopefully! I might awkwardly wait a while though..... derp.

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Sounds like your friends got infatuated with a new term. Relating to something doesn't mean you're it. I second your decision to wait a while. :cake:

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Galactic Turtle
4 minutes ago, roland.o said:

Sounds like your friends got infatuated with a new term. Relating to something doesn't mean you're it. I second your decision to wait a while. :cake:

Thanks! That's what I'm suspecting as well...

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