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BooTheArtist

Relationship Issues

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BooTheArtist

I have been with my boyfriend for a little over a year now. I started dating him when I was in the early stages of figuring out if I was ace or not.

He happens to be very sexual and I'm not. We haven't done anything as of yet, but he seems to be talking about it more and more now and it makes me uncomfortable. Sadly, I haven't been able to find the right time to tell him how I feel about this. Only a few people in my life know that I am ace and he isn't one of them...

I'm scared that I am going to tell him that I am and he will want nothing to do with me. I like him as a person and as a friend and I don't want to lose that. 

I don't have many friends to begin with, so it would hurt a lot to lose that.

So I don't know what I should do. 

Of course I need to tell him and we need to talk it out, but I just hope he doesn't leave me all together..

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roland.o

Hello BooTheArtist,

 

as you are already aware of, in the end, you'll have to tell him. And it's up to him how he's going to respond. But consider this: the longer you leave him in the dark, the stronger he'll feel to have been mislead.

 

I hope things will work out for the both of you!

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Light18

It will be hard, but you should tell him. He may leave, but he may still be your friend. He will feel more hurt if he thinks you led him on.

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BooTheArtist

Told him today. Wrote about a whole paragraph explaining things and apologizing for not telling him sooner. He says he has to collect his thoughts and that he will talk to me tomorrow...

I really wish he would have talked to me tonight about it, because now I am stuck in this place where my anxiety is flaring up and causing a million different scenarios to go off in my head.

And I really just want to know where we are gonna go from here...

Not gonna sleep so well tonight I guess...

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:)(:

Hey I’m sure things will you have been with him for a year? That’s really special. I can say much else but try making your mind completely blank and blocking out your thoughts?

 

 

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kirakana

@BooTheArtist disscussing difficult topics such as this is never easy. You are brave to iniciate it. And, as :)(: said - you've been together for a year, which means you shared quite a lot of milestones together. This could become one of these milestones, because you've opened to him on a completely different level. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a happy outcome.

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BooTheArtist

He finally got back to me.

Talked a lot about things and what we should do.

I let him decide since I didn't know what to really do myself and he chose that we should break it off.

I don't know how I feel about this whole thing, we were really close friends before we started dating one another and I'm really hoping that we can go back to that, but I'm not so sure anymore.

I know I did the right thing and hopefully everything will turn out for the best after this.

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Sotai

I'm sorry to hear that you guys broke up, but I hope you feel better knowing that you did do the right thing by talking to him. I hope that you two become friends again. Right now, it's too vulnerable a time and each of you should take the time to process what happened and understand how you feel about it. 

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:)(:

Did you ask him if you guys are still friends ?

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BooTheArtist

He said that he would like to stay as friends yes.

But I think it is going to take a while to get to the place where we were before we started going out.

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:)(:

I see.

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kirakana

I'm sorry to hear it didn't work out. We are rooting for you @BooTheArtist!

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Nylocke

I think you should just be honest, nothing good comes of hiding something like that.

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