TrashyBoi Posted November 28, 2017 Share Posted November 28, 2017 i like cuddles and little kisses and hugs and holding hands but everytime im in a relationship i feel all boxed up and super uncomfortable. It might be since I was in an abusive relationship and I used to watch my dad beat up my mom. but honestly all i want to do is make people feel special and happy but when somebody tries to date me i get severe anxiety and break it off. i feell really bad because i dont want others to be sad but its like i dont work Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Deus Ex Infinity Posted November 28, 2017 Share Posted November 28, 2017 31 minutes ago, TrashyBoi said: i like cuddles and little kisses and hugs and holding hands but everytime im in a relationship i feel all boxed up and super uncomfortable. It might be since I was in an abusive relationship and I used to watch my dad beat up my mom. but honestly all i want to do is make people feel special and happy but when somebody tries to date me i get severe anxiety and break it off. i feell really bad because i dont want others to be sad but its like i dont work I don't think that there's something wrong with you. It's ok to stay single while enjoying physical closeness with someone else. Having or being into a relationship is nothing but another social mainstream stereotype you should try to break free of. Just because you feel uncomfortable with it, doesn't mean that you're disfunctional. Under contrary. It's your life - your rules. You don't have to meet all public social expectations just to feel "normal" for the sake of being a valid part of it. You shouldn't force yourself into dating if it makes you feel wrong. Just hold on to the things that you really like or want to do. It's gonna be ok Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted November 28, 2017 Share Posted November 28, 2017 Can you specify what makes you feel uneasy in a relationship? Is the other person over-reciprocating? Do you feel stuck with them forever? Do you feel they expect something of you you can't give? Do you have a negative self-perspective/feel undeserving of their affection? Or like you said, do you anticipate they'll turn out abusive/the relationship turn negative? Are you even crushing on the people you're with? Do you not desire sex and anticipate they do? But really, it sounds like you have an anxiety problem; which only therapy or medication can treat (the latter of which not solving the problem and lowers libido). Link to post Share on other sites
TrashyBoi Posted November 30, 2017 Author Share Posted November 30, 2017 I just feel unable to reciprocate their romantic feelings. When I have a crush I simply find the person attractive I have no impulse to act upon. I do have severe anxiety and I have been taking medication since I was about 8. Relationships are just unappealing. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Bit Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 You just think people are pretty or have a pull to look at them due to their beauty/mannerisms? (the latter called aesthetic attraction) Nothing more? No desire for emotional closeness? That's not a crush, that's just platonic feelings. Your reaction is a normal response to unreciprocation. But then your new statement seems contradictory to your previous. You said you like cuddles, etc, but then now say you only think they're pretty and have no urge to do anything with them. Link to post Share on other sites
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