VirginRose Posted November 28, 2017 Share Posted November 28, 2017 I'm just wondering if this is a foreign concept? I've always thought there was appeal in the idea of being a housewife. I could take care of housework and cooking, stay home with the animals, and avoid stressful work situations and people that might trigger my anxiety attacks. All while doing art commissions for extra cash. But societal norms seem to dictate two specific rules for being a housewife. Taking care of your significant other's more carnal needs and having kids. After taking care of my brother who is a high functioning autistic like me, I've concluded I don't want kids. I can barely take care of myself. And I'm not so sure whether I'd be able to please my partner sexually or not. Theory and action are two very different things. I'm not sex repulsed, but I don't like being touched that way. I can't fulfill the two societal requirements for being a housewife. So my question is...is this dream life even possible? Would I be seen as simply a mooch and a lay about for simply taking care of things at home? I can't handle a real job, it made my depression worse. Is there any hope of finding someone who won't force this expectations? I want love, but not at the cost of feeling like a toy and a baby maker. It should be noted that I'm a panromantic asexual. So the gender of said partner is a non issue. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted November 28, 2017 Share Posted November 28, 2017 You just need an asexual husband (totally attainable!) and he'll be just as happy as you are with that situation Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SithAzathoth WinterDragon Posted November 28, 2017 Share Posted November 28, 2017 Either way, if she, they or he can except you for who you are, and respect it then go for it. I'm homoraomantic and want someone at some point as long as the other is asexual and is not into being sexual, as I never want to even try sex. I recently had a birthday too. I'm in my late 20s and never been sexual. All I'm saying it can be possible just hope that your future partner either they being a she, they or he can respect your wishes of how you want the relationship to be. Best of luck. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Yannick Posted November 29, 2017 Share Posted November 29, 2017 I think this dream is totally achievable if you find the right partner . If your partner respects you and your wishes there should be no problems. Having kids is not something you can compromise on though, so you'd need to find someone who doesn't want kids, and those people are quite scarce. I'd say achieving this is perfectly possible, as long as you keep believing! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Stheg Posted November 29, 2017 Share Posted November 29, 2017 Just because you don't meet the societal expectation doesn't mean you can't be a housewife. There are men who stay home and there are women who stay home who do not fit traditional societal expectations of what a spouse who stays home looks like, but it doesn't make their positions any less valid. From your post, it seems you aren't particularly well adapted to the traditional work world anyways. If it works for you and your partner, do it and I honestly don't think whether your partner is male or female has anything to do with it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RoseGoesToYale Posted December 2, 2017 Share Posted December 2, 2017 I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Whenever I travel to visit other people, I find myself cooking and cleaning for them, and actually enjoying it. I can also sew and fix household things. But I'm the same boat, I don't want children and I really don't think I could ever do sex. But I know there are people out there, more so nowadays, that don't want kids, since some don't have the financial resources or simply don't see having them as a necessity for a fulfilling life. And of course, there plenty of people out there who aren't interested in sex. I definitely think your dream is achievable, don't give up the search. Also, regarding housekeeping, I dispute the idea that it isn't a legitimate occupation. On the contrary, it's still extremely important. Having a clean house means the spread of less disease and living in a pleasant, non-dangerous environment. And being able to or having someone who's skilled at cooking means square meals as opposed to microwaving everything. The only difference with being a housewife is you get payed in food, housing, and other material needs, as opposed to a direct paycheck. Never mind what society says, you do what you want to do. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fallenangell Posted December 2, 2017 Share Posted December 2, 2017 I think it's possible to get your dream life with the right partner, but you should still be able to be independent in the mean time and if something ever goes wrong. So focus on your art or pursue another job that would be compatible with your mental health so you can support yourself. I also don't want kids but I do want a partner. We just have to find someone who doesn't want kids either. I've also thought about being a housewife even though I'm a med student - you're not alone ! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Philip027 Posted December 3, 2017 Share Posted December 3, 2017 Quote societal norms Ignore these. People are all different. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.