demidear Posted November 27, 2017 Share Posted November 27, 2017 I'm a Demisexual in a relationship with my best friend. We've been friends since high school (we're 26 now) and he is absolutely anything I could have ever dreamed of in a partner. He's a hopeless romantic and honestly, I think he might be a Demisexual too. He physically cannot have hook ups and has only ever had one other partner. There's just one thing, I think he might be addicted to sex. When he was single he masturbated an average of six times a day. Naturally, I'm just not interested in that rate of intimacy plus he doesn't really turn me on. I don't think he really understands the concept because for him he's just always raring to go. I try to get myself in the mood but I don't have a lot of success, I'm still in school and busy but also I feel like I'm often doing it for him instead of myself. He tries his best not to pressure me and he gets frustrated with himself that it's so hard for him to go without for even a day but, like anyone with an addiction, he gets grumpy and withdrawn at times. He apologizes for it often without me even mentioning his downcast mood but it's not like I don't notice. Does anyone have any advice? I love this man to death and I just want us both to be happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted November 27, 2017 Share Posted November 27, 2017 (I'm on my phone so I can't actually see from your profile you're a female. I'm assuming you're a girl but I'm super sorry if I misgendered you, though most of this stuff could still be varied slightly to apply to a homosexual couple!) There are some things you could that don't necessarily have to involve you being 'in the mood', that mean he can still get sexual release. I guess I would kind of be called a 'sex addict' or hypersexual within the confines of my sexual relationship, but my body isn't very good at reacting to what my brain wants, so I'm often not physically aroused even though I want sex emotionally. This would make sex acts involving my genitals very painful for me so couldn't keep up with my partners high libido if those were the only types of sex we were into. However, there are things you can do as a female that don't require you actually being aroused! Like for example, your partner can use your breasts either to masturbate onto or to put his penis between them and use them to stimulate himself. Also giving him oral sex means you don't need to be aroused for him to get off, or even just kissing and cuddling him while he masturbates onto your body. OR you could take sexy naked pics of yourself and give them to him to masturbate to, a few new ones a week might be able to help keep him occupied when he masturbates? Would you be into any of that sort of thing? I could never have any type of penetrative sex if I wasn't aroused enough for it (and arousal can be difficult for me) but I can definitely enjoy and love those other things, and I get off emotionally on knowing he is still able to use my body to get off even if my own genitals are refusing to come to the party Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
demidear Posted November 28, 2017 Author Share Posted November 28, 2017 Thanks for the tips! I'll have to give some a try and see what he thinks Link to post Share on other sites
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