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I need some clarity - TMI


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I don't know if it's because I'm gender fluid but at times I question my sexuality because sometimes I feel like I have the wrong genitals and should have a vagina and breasts. With this I become aroused by the thought of sexual contact with men but it's more a craving for their genitals inside of mine than attraction to them as a man. So, I like the thought of oral and vaginal sex with them during this time (with me being a woman and not a man) but I don't like how they look aesthetically. Last night I had a sexual dream and have spent the day feeling like this. I don't usually have sexual dreams so it's the first one in years really.

 

Generally, I feel just aesthetically attracted to women but not sexually interested at all, hence thinking of myself as asexual. What does it make me though with these other desires?

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Mostly Peaceful Ryan

hmmm, I'm honestly not sure, I have heard of heterosexual people having fantasies of homosexual acts, so you could just be hetero-romantic asexual. Maybe bi-curious? I'd maybe let yourself explore what attracts you more, and not close off any possibilities of men, but if you aren't comfortable with the idea of that, I get it, just stick to being hetero-romantic. That's the best advice I can give on this one. 

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Thank you for your post!

 

I think I would explore it if I was attracted to men at all but it's just about the genitals in my fantasies and so not about men at all. Again though, I'm a woman in these fantasies and I don't imagine myself as a man having sex with a man. It makes me wonder if I would have been a heterosexual woman if I was born that way and the mismatch of gender and hormones has caused this issue. 

 

Basically, I could have a meaningful relationship with a woman but not be interested in their genitals, whereas with men I wouldn't be able to have a relationship with them but crave them sexually sometimes. It confuses me. The meaningful relationship is what I want of course but I don't know what to do with my desires. 

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Mostly Peaceful Ryan

Not sure, a fantasy could just be a fantasy, maybe you could try open relationships?  This is hard to give a good answer on this one.  Sorry

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Without ever having had any personal experience in the area, it almost sounds like some kind of gender dysphoria. Have you considered looking at some transexual type stuff, to see if that fits you?

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  • 2 weeks later...
On November 23, 2017 at 3:00 AM, The Unknown Warrior said:

 

 

Basically, I could have a meaningful relationship with a woman but not be interested in their genitals, whereas with men I wouldn't be able to have a relationship with them but crave them sexually sometimes. It confuses me. The meaningful relationship is what I want of course but I don't know what to do with my desires. 

Have you played around with sex toys that could meet your needs without a man?

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