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F t M ... t F? / Transitioning while still being cis?


6Unmentionable9

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6Unmentionable9

Sometimes when I imagine myself transitioning and being 100% masculine-bodied... I still imagine myself presenting as female? I imagine myself getting top surgery, but then wearing bras and padding. I imagine myself having bottom surgery, and then tucking. Sometimes I also imagine having long hair and wearing skirts and heels. wtf?

 

I want to transition no doubt about it, I want at least HRT and top surgery and to legally change my name and sex, but I still sometimes think about dying my hair purple and putting it into pigtails. Or again, wearing padded bras and skirts. Am I the only one on here like this? I still feel like I don't want to be perceived as female, or at least not cis female. Is it possible to transition and then want to transition back? I feel like I wouldn't mind being seen as female as long as I wasn't seen as cis... it's really weird and probably offensive, but it is how it is.

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You can certainly be an effeminate trans man! Your expression doesn’t define your gender.

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I mean... Some people want to transition and then realize it wasn't really for them and want to detransition, but it's not something they think of ahead like this. 

Maybe you mean that you want to transition to male and then crossdress/do drag, while still having a male identity and body? 

Tricky but interesting question.

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Lonemathsytoothbrushthief

I'm genderflux and dysphoria of all types comes and goes for me, sometimes I look in the mirror and think I'd love to have a more masculine looking face and a flat chest while other times I'm kind of cool with having a chest and maybe even wearing makeup, so yeah you're not alone ^_^ I want to medically transition but also would love to mix things up a lot, and though I haven't imagined quite the same things as you(since I don't want that sort of bottom surgery in the first place so probably won't have it), I feel like once I had top surgery and HRT I'd maybe wear more feminine clothes again. Though I can't wear high heels anyway so it wouldn't look as feminine as with others(plus I'm pissed at the fact companies can get so mad at women for not wearing high heels anyway-they're hard to wear ffs!) and I haven't gotten on with makeup or nail varnish in the past either :( either way, if you want to do these things, even if you feel it undermines going for a medical transition, it doesn't actually say anything about your gender identity unless you say it does so go for it.

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