Just questioning.

[Lord Pocky]

 

 

Feelings are weird and my brains racing trying to figure stuff out, like what?!

 

 

What type of attraction do I feel? Certainly not sexual or romantic. I think I might feel aesthetic and platonic attraction. 

 

Here's how I see those working for me; for aesthetic, I like how people look, like looking at a piece of art that you appreciate for the colors, features, and overall warmth or coldness you feel from that piece. For me, it's always the eyes, hair, and smile. 

 

Just a way some people can smile makes me very happy. I'm a redhead lover (no romo) and I just like the way peoples eyes are; whether it be brown, blue, green, or black. 

 

I don't know why but they make me wanna try and draw that person rather than touch that person or want a relationship.

 

 

Now onto platonic: now this is where I get a little confused about intimacy and overall what platonic means. I like friends. And yet, if I were to meet someone who I admired greatly (whether it be their strength, skills, or just their overall personality) I would want so desperately to be their friend and get to know them. 

 

Instead of wanting to date them, I'd want to know how their day went. I'd like to make them smile, I want us to hang out and joke around, and both of us comfort each other during hard times saying "everything's going to be okay" or "I'm here, you're safe.". I kind of want to be held by them as they say these things. I'm sorry I'm rambling, but I tend to write rather sloppily. 

 

I'd like for them to give me forehead kisses or pecks on the cheek. Quick hugs and watching movies while sitting next to one another (not really cuddling, but sitting side by side while under a blanket)

 

I don't know, I'm just putting my thoughts out. So uh, is this an accurate description of these feelings? (Aesthetic and platonic) 

 

 

 

 

[TheAP]

Yes, that seems about right. It sounds like you might like a queerplatonic relationship.

[Lord Pocky]

Ooh that sounds lovely! But then I'd get nervous if I'd have to hold that persons hand or kiss em on the lips. And I'd be afraid that my parents would be expecting grandkids just because I am with this person platonically. So yeah, maybe one day? 

[kaysir]

Your descriptions fit aesthetic and platonic attraction perfectly well. The things you desire can be achieved in a friendship, a queer platonic relationship, or a romance. You just have to lay down some rules and be clear with whoever you might be interested in. You won't have to kiss on the lips or hold hands or anything you don't want to do as long as you find someone who respects your boundaries, but you might come to enjoy things like that, too.

[Lord Pocky]

Thanks for voicing your opinion @kaysir, it means a lot to hear different voices on such smallish yet personal topics! 

[MostliiGhostii]

Wow you explained pretty much everything I enjoy! Honestly you probably are asthetically and platonically attracted, but desire a more intense friendship as a partner. 

 

I know it kinda stinks because pop culture REALLY VALUES sex and romance in a relationship, which is confusing for people like us!! Honestly forming relationships can be hard becuase people may consider our platonic actions as romantic or sexual in some way.

 

Honestly, romance was something invented pretty recently. It was indeed popular in the times of shakespere but was made prominent in victorian era literature with the moonlit kisses, chivalry, and delicate horny females (all so gross). If you look up the seven greek words for love, you’ll come across one word called “Philia” or brotherly love. This love is a very deep friendship were each of the two people are extremely loyal to each other and fond of each person for their soul and personality instead of sexual intercourse.

[CamT]

A companion that you don't need to be sexual with but you love nonetheless, like a very dear family/friend - i think this is what i need. 

[Lord Pocky]

4 hours ago, CamT said:

A companion that you don't need to be sexual with but you love nonetheless, like a very dear family/friend - i think this is what i need. 

Yes! That's exactly what I need!  

 But I wouldn't be able to find one in my school since there's only sex crazed and loud teenagers in there. Bleh. 

 

I want someone to laugh with, play games with, have intricate and powerful discussions with. Romance? Nah! Sex? Ha ha nope! 

 

Just give ive me some strawberry milk, some cheesy old horror movies (without the sex please!) and give me someone (don't know whether man or woman?) who can laugh with me at the cheesy one liners and special effects with.