Do your hobbies/interests help you bond with people?

[artzcat]

17 hours ago, Jonitus said:

The hobbies I have are the ones I can enjoy by myself and don't have to involve other people whatsoever.  My hobbies are my break from the world.

I have felt this way about some of my interests. I remembering sharing something with some friends a few years ago and they became so obsessed with it that we couldn't talk about anything else and it actually annoyed me more than brought me closer to them. I just didn't like talking about it with them (or anyone) for some reason. I really do prefer to have at least a few hobbies and interests that are private.  

 

 

[artzcat]

8 hours ago, Visenya said:

My interests and hobbies are mostly things to do alone, and I haven't found many people who have similar interests. I'd love to be able to talk about the books and TV shows that I like (among other things) with people, though. They probably think that I don't get excited about anything in life, but that's because I've rarely had the chance to talk about the things I'm passionate about. Other than hobbies, I don't have much to talk about with people because we don't usually share similar experiences either. I'm not into dating and relationships, which makes my life a bit more drama-free and boring, so most of the time I just listen while people talk about their lives. It kinda made me feel like every close friendship I've ever had was a bit too one-sided, so I guess that, in general, I just suck at bonding with other people (at least in real life, because online is a bit easier). I thought that being more open about my personal life would help with that, but I've had too many bad experiences, so I don't talk about it as much anymore.

 

To sum up, I believe that having similar hobbies, interests, personalities, and life experiences helps bonding with other people, but finding them can be much more difficult, at least in my experience.

I relate to this so much. I also have hobbies and interest that don't involve/need other people. I can tell at work that everyone probably thinks I'm super lame because I never mention doing something with other people. That is kinda where my question came from. I was wondering if maybe I would feel closer to people if we had the same interests and hobbies but like you and others have said I guess that is only a part of it. 

[Member7783]

2 hours ago, artzcat said:

I have felt this way about some of my interests. I remembering sharing something with some friends a few years ago and they became so obsessed with it that we couldn't talk about anything else and it actually annoyed me more than brought me closer to them. I just didn't like talking about it with them (or anyone) for some reason. I really do prefer to have at least a few hobbies and interests that are private.  

In 2006, I started building custom and replica lightsabers and at that time, the hobby was sparsely populated which was cool for me.  Over the next few years, it got to be pretty popular, and while I appreciated the money I made being commissioned by people to build them stuff, it almost got to be a full-time thing keeping up with the trends and the conversations on the forums dedicated to those discussions...and I started getting put off.

 

It's the same for me with most of my other hobbies.  While I'd like to meet up with some folks online to run some dungeons in Diablo III over the PlayStation network, part of me thinks "nah, I'm good doing this by myself".

2 hours ago, artzcat said:

 

 

 

[swirl_of_blue]

I have both private hobbies and interests that people generally do not know about as well as hobbies I share with others. Music and sports are something that are very much shared just because of their nature: you can't be in a band alone, and football also requires a team. But most of my time I do spend alone quite absorbed into things that I never share with anyone else. Some of those things I prefer to keep that way, but some I would love to share with someone if I found a person that is interested in the same things.

[JumpingKudu]

Most of my favorite hobbies can be done alone, so meeting new people is hit or miss. One of my favorite daily hobbies is scrapbooking and the most interaction I get out of that is talking with the cashier at the craft store. For my more adventurous hobbies, such as hiking and kayaking, I usually go alone or with my family. Like I said, it can be hit or miss with the level of interaction with other people. 

[oldgeeza]

I like to learn, I built an old Land Rover from the chassis up many years ago, more recently, I gutted my house and apart from the actual building, with the help of a good friend, rebuilt the whole inside and put a new roof on the place, as it is a converted stable block, it doesn't conform to all legal building regulations, all cupboards etc had to be built to fit as standard cupboards and wardrobes are too tall to fit, doing these things, I have managed to meet some interesting people, along with some complete rogues, I have lost loads over the years by trusting the wrong people, landed on my backside, even been bankrupt from being ripped off, but I shrug it off and carry on.

[Ammy-G]

My interests don't help me bond very often... I have a bad case of un-intentional hipster-ness

[SamwiseLovesLife]

Travel definately as most people I talk to want to hear about the places I've been and what different cultures are like in person

[Sean_Bird]

Ballroom dancing and nerd talk.

[Knight of Cydonia]

Shared hobbies/interests aren't necessary for me to bond with someone, but they can certainly help. I'm quite introverted and often can't think of things to say when meeting new people; but if there's a shared interest, it becomes incredibly easier to at least get started on a conversation, and later to figure out what to do together when we hang out.

 

Come to think of it, I got to know all of my friends through shared interests. One of my friends I only started talking to because I found out she loves my favourite TV show. Another of my friends and I love gaming, and we took physics and english classes together in our first year at university which got us talking. I specifically remember him being amazed to find out I played YuGiOh, and after finding out we had both re-watched the exact same TV show that aired during our childhoods just the previous summer, we knew we had something special. And my SO started talking to me in the first place because I had mentioned I loved things like astrophysics and Star Trek, and to this day we share almost all of the same hobbies and interests. 

[Yatogami]

I am a very anti-social person at heart, but I have hobbies that forces me to interact with people. Like Yugioh, MMOs, Writing, and debating politics. 

[fiѕh]

I get bored of people with the same interests quickly, so I usually don't

[Polygon]

It's hit and miss. It can lead to a pretty superficial bond if the only thing you both have in common is an interest in underwater basket weaving. Sometimes it's a good way to get to know people as a sort of foot-in-the-door icebreaker. 

[Snao Cone]

2 hours ago, Polygon said:

It's hit and miss. It can lead to a pretty superficial bond if the only thing you both have in common is an interest in underwater basket weaving. Sometimes it's a good way to get to know people as a sort of foot-in-the-door icebreaker. 

So I take it said underwater basket weaving is a...shallow activity?

 

[dodges tomatoes]

[Polygon]

4 minutes ago, Snao Cone said:

So I take it said underwater basket weaving is a...shallow activity?

 

[dodges tomatoes]

 

[Pramana]

I primarily maintain contact with people through writing about food and politics. In this way, my solo hobbies function as social hobbies.

[bejjinks]

I find that typically when I share my hobbies/interests, people take off assuming that I am interested in EXACTLY the same way they are. If I say I like dancing, they start country line dancing or rock or hip hop dancing. I want to go waltzing, folk dancing or do ballet. If I say I like punk music, they start listing every punk musician that has ever lived. If I say I want to visit the Washington Monument, they take me to Mount Vernon or the Jefferson Memorial. If I say I want to visit north Yellowstone, they take me to south Yellowstone. It's not exactly sharing a hobby when they drag me to something other than what I'm interested in.

[Leilamy]

I think it's really easier to bond with people when you have shared interests. For me it's particularly the case with TV shows, movies, anime, cartoon; reading and writing (I met lot of people on the internet thanks to Role Play) as well as videogames.

 

If I don't have any shared interests with the person, I find the conversation to be a bit lacking sometimes

[verymelancholic]

Damn near impossible for me.

[Goonie]

I don't bond with people on my hobbies. Some know of some of them. Others know of other ones of them. Mostly in the arts/crafts. And if I do some of my hobbies in public it tends to get weird reactions from people which I find amusing. 

[iff]

@artzcat

 

This poll is being locked and moved to the read only Census archive for it's respective year. As part of ongoing Census organisation, and in an attempt to keep the demographics of the polls current with the active user base at the time, the polls will last for one year from now on. However, members are allowed and even encouraged to re-start new polls similar to the archived ones if they like them.

  

iff, Census Forum Moderator