• Announcements

    • Kelly

      New Team members Needed--Moderator, Project Team, and Declass Team: Voting   12/10/13

      See:   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/164659-new-declass-team-member-needed-voting/   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/164657-new-moderator-member-needed-qa-co-mod-and-world-watch-mod-voting/   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/164656-new-project-team-member-needed-resources-and-education-director-voting/  
    • Kelly

      AVENues Holiday Special Edition is now live   08/17/17

      The new edition of AVENues is done!   See:        
    • Lady Girl

      Ace Community Census   11/06/17

      It’s time for the 2017 Ace Community Census!   see:   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/162675-announcing-the-2017-ace-community-census/  
    • Heart

      Help fund AVEN's servers!   11/06/17

      AVEN is doing its annual fundraiser to raise donations for server costs! See http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/163251-aven-server-fundraiser/ for more details.  
StormySky

Mandatory health class next semester when repulsed

Recommended Posts

StormySky

So... uh, yeah. I've never been in this particular section for obvious reasons, but where else to post this topic? I had to endure a not-mega-explicit sexual conversation in math and had to retain myself from throwing up. I already feel bad for the school janitor when the time comes, lol 🤢😝

 

How do I survive this upcoming high school misery? I'm rather innocent so I hope the worst will fly over my head.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
banoffeepie

Long time since I've had to worry about classes lol

But sometimes when I eat out with friends someone orders seafood and I have to watch them eat it and put up with the stench.

 

So, much the same thing I guess.:D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Graceful

Honestly? It's an important class. Don't eat and take Tums?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StormySky
1 minute ago, Graceful said:

Honestly? It's an important class. Don't eat and take Tums?

Last time I took tums they made me feel more nauseous, somehow. Though maybe I can find another medicine that doesn't spark the same reaction?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Graceful
1 minute ago, StormySky said:

Last time I took tums they made me feel more nauseous, somehow. Though maybe I can find another medicine that doesn't spark the same reaction?

Maybe concentrate on what's making you nauseous instead. Anxiety? What can you do that will help keep you as calm as possible while still able to learn? Can you draw during the class? Wear a comforting scent or hoodie? Sit in a particular place? Something that will help you get through the class without feeling your absolute worst.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StormySky
4 minutes ago, Graceful said:

Maybe concentrate on what's making you nauseous instead. Anxiety? What can you do that will help keep you as calm as possible while still able to learn? Can you draw during the class? Wear a comforting scent or hoodie? Sit in a particular place? Something that will help you get through the class without feeling your absolute worst.

Doesn't make me incredibly anxious... just really, really, disgusted. Imagine the feeling you get from seeing an overflowing toilet that smells like hell... I get that exact feeling when listening to explicit dialogue/descriptions.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Graceful
Just now, StormySky said:

Doesn't make me incredibly anxious... just really, really, disgusted. Imagine the feeling you get from seeing an overflowing toilet that smells like hell... I get that exact feeling when listening to explicit dialogue/descriptions.

Exposure tends to help with that sort of thing. But I don't think your class should be explicit? It should be from an academic perspective. I don't know if there's anything that helps with actual disgust other than adjusting your own mindset but that's much easier said than done and doesn't happen overnight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
InquisitivePhilosopher

I felt the same way about sex ed and health class; at the time, I didn't see the point of having to learn about something that I wasn't interested in doing.

 

But becoming older has changed my feelings about learning about sexuality and sexual topics: even though I'm still not interested in doing those things myself, I now understand why it's important to know them and am intrigued to learn about the differences and to hypothesize about the possible genetic origins of peoples' asexuality.

 

Maybe it'd help you try to think about it as just, "I'm being taught about other peoples' sexuality; not myself. And even though I don't like it because it doesn't apply to me, knowing this stuff could help me explain to others (whether questioning asexuals or those who might be heterosexual/homosexual, etc.) the differences between my own sexuality and theirs."

 

Basically, learning about heterosexuality, etc. might help you feel more confident about your own sexuality and more certain that you're not mistaken about who you are. Then others won't be able to confuse you by telling you, "You're too young to know your sexuality," "You're heterosexual," etc., and you can then explain to them, "Well, no I'm not, because in sex ed and health class, I learned this and this about sexuality."

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Illegal Calculus

Health Classes tend to be more mature, they won't be as gross or explicit as other kids talking about it since the focus will be as far away from what people are interested in doing as possible and instead focus on protection, risks, labeling, and general physical and mental health.  The grossest you will have to endure would be the types of birth control that are put inside the uterus.  The  actual part about sex will just be an explanation of how impregnation works, the rest of the class should just be risk percentages of multiple types of STIs, consent, how to form healthy relationships, and maybe one class that will be an anonymous Q&A for all of the weird misconceptions some students will have.  Worry not about the class and instead the students.  What I find helps is imagining everything as black and white basic diagrams and scientific terms.  "Love is just oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine"  Think with that mindset and you should be able to remove the gross visualizations you would otherwise have.  Try to get excited about the small things, like looking forward to having a sexuality test so you can "ace" it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Moonchaser

When I was in school it was just handled in a fairly clinical way, scientifically, and it seemed pretty removed from reality. It didn't have that much relation to the actual act, and there was a lot of important health information that everybody needs. I wouldn't worry about it too much. I can't say for certain, but I don't think there's likely to be much there to trigger revulsion, unless you let your imagination run away with you, but that would be you, not the class content. Just stick to the facts of the matter, the textbook version, and you should be okay. There's no need to actually visualize personally taking part or anything. It did satisfy a lot of my curiosity about how things work.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wish Bear 🌠

Idk. It still grosses me out, and I'm 28. In my biology course last semester we covered a lot of material on it. I had to look away from the lecture slides at times.

 

Just don't look at anything if you are too grossed out. Unfortunately hearing it isn't something you can avoid, but I find it is a lot worse to look and listen at the same time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Fioryn

My sex ed lecture in high school was pretty mediocre. The lecturer didn't say very much about the act itself or how it works. She just gave us statistics on STDs and teen pregnancy, and hoped it would scare us all away from sex. :P Maybe you'll luck out and you won't have to hear much about sex itself, either. ;)

 

But in all seriousness, it's okay -- good even -- to know how sex works. And not because it's about sex, but because it's about your body. It's important to know how your sexual organs operate, even if you don't plan on using them. Just don't think of it as a sex class... think of it as an opportunity to learn about a part of yourself that you don't usually think about much.

 

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StormySky
6 minutes ago, Wish Bear 🌠 said:

Idk. It still grosses me out, and I'm 28. In my biology course last semester we covered a lot of material on it. I had to look away from the lecture slides at times.

 

Just don't look at anything if you are too grossed out. Unfortunately hearing it isn't something you can avoid, but I find it is a lot worse to look and listen at the same time.

Thank you! looking away seems very helpful, though even mentioning can send me over the edge.

I wish I didn't have such a weak stomach, though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
CosineTheChristmasCat
54 minutes ago, StormySky said:

So... uh, yeah. I've never been in this particular section for obvious reasons, but where else to post this topic? I had to endure a not-mega-explicit sexual conversation in math and had to retain myself from throwing up. I already feel bad for the school janitor when the time comes, lol 🤢😝

 

How do I survive this upcoming high school misery? I'm rather innocent so I hope the worst will fly over my head.


Think of it this way, you're doing yourself a disfavor if you do not take the class. You're limiting your education because it's something that bothers you. Anyone who has been to university or colleges will tell you that you're going to have to be put into classes and situations that you don't particularly like, but you have to do them as it's a part of getting your degree/diploma/etc. Since you're dealing with an irrational anxiety, treat it as such. Look into it now the types of things you're going to be learning about before it starts so you know what's going to be discussed, STI's, birth control, the functions of sexuality and sex, reasons behind it, consent and safety. Look at the different things and understand why they're teaching you these things. You may not like the information, you may be upset by the information, but it's  extremely important to understand what to do in case of emergency, even if it isn't your emergency. You have friends, family, and other people around you that might rely on you for some type of help due to something that went on in their life. My once best friend required me to get her Plan B after a drunken virginity losing sex session. 

 

On top of that, sexual health classes often focus a lot on the romantic relationship and what is a healthy relationship. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Illegal Calculus

I have seen a lot of people mention that StormySky should not skip this class, and I think it would be useful to clarify that none of the posts have ever mentioned doing that, only how to survive through that class.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
CosineTheChristmasCat
Just now, Illegal Calculus said:

I have seen a lot of people mention that StormySky should not skip this class, and I think it would be useful to clarify that none of the posts have ever mentioned doing that, only how to survive through that class.

 

I think it's because most of us know, even if someone is repulsed, the reasons why sexual health classes are important. Things can change in a person's life too, people can lose their repulsed nature surrounding sex and partake or enjoy having sex.  @StormySky I'm not saying that this will happen you, this is just a situation that can happen, and I've seen it happen numerous times on AVEN and surrounding sites. 

Also, they posted it in The Sex Talk, and most of us here have had or enjoyed sex in some regard, or enjoy our sexual aspect to our bodies. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StormySky

Well of course I'm going to take the class... it's information everyone must know... just wondering how not to puke

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
CosineTheChristmasCat
1 minute ago, StormySky said:

Well of course I'm going to take the class... it's information everyone must know... just wondering how not to puke


It's an anxiety, right? 
 

As I said, look up ways to combat anxieties in general. It's something people overlook when first thinking about something that disturbs them, but it's really the only long-term way to help, even in the future when in situations or conversations what sex is a topic.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
InquisitivePhilosopher

Well, the reason I didn't mention it was because @StormySky titled it "Mandatory Health Class...," giving the impression that they couldn't get out of it, that their parents, teachers, or that their school district required them take the class in order to receive their high school diploma (my high school required everyone to take a mandatory health class that no one could get out of.)

 

Because I'd already been taught the basics in a mandatory sex ed class in fifth grade, that they were going to teach in an eighth grade sex ed class in another school district I was attending, my parents got me out of having to repeat it, again. (My family moved a lot, and, at that time, each school district in every state taught different topics in different grades, at different paces; so, some of the schools I attended were requiring classes that I'd already taken in other school districts. Having to repeat subjects and classes that I'd already passed in other schools, was boring.)

 

 

Deep breathing and trying to redirect your thoughts to other things that you could think about in order to calm yourself, other than how the topic might make you sick, might help prevent you from throwing up. I used to have trouble with feeling physically ill about the pictures being shown, too, and would look at them, briefly, just enough to learn about what the teachers were explaining (so that I could pass the class), then look away.

 

Maybe that's why some of my classmates chose to laugh, instead, and made jokes while being taught these things: it might've helped them not feel sick or nervous. Perhaps, you could try to think about something funny or pleasant. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
StormySky
53 minutes ago, That Scary Black Cat said:


It's an anxiety, right? 
 

As I said, look up ways to combat anxieties in general. It's something people overlook when first thinking about something that disturbs them, but it's really the only long-term way to help, even in the future when in situations or conversations what sex is a topic.

I'm not sure if describing it as an anxiety would be 100% accurate. I don't feel nervous, but I certainly don't feel anything positive. It's more of a sudden visceral reaction that takes a lot of control to hold back and swallow back down (quite literally, haha) and dealing through distracts me from taking notes. 

 

I'll practice breathing techniques just in case though, thank you for the advice. Maybe it'll assimilate me to the other teens and their conversations.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wish Bear 🌠

.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
CosineTheChristmasCat
15 hours ago, StormySky said:

I'm not sure if describing it as an anxiety would be 100% accurate. I don't feel nervous, but I certainly don't feel anything positive. It's more of a sudden visceral reaction that takes a lot of control to hold back and swallow back down (quite literally, haha) and dealing through distracts me from taking notes. 

 

I'll practice breathing techniques just in case though, thank you for the advice. Maybe it'll assimilate me to the other teens and their conversations.

 

Nervousness isn't the only form of anxiety, visceral reactions like that can be part of it as well. What's I've found talking with a lot of sex-repulsed people is it is an anxiety they're dealing with and that's why I'm specifying working on anxiety relaxing or countering techniques. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
LadyWallflower

Is the entire semester about sexual health? Because if it is a mandatory health class, I figure only one chapter is about sexual education. The rest will be on other matters, such as mental health, biological health, various body systems, the important of exercise, etc. To deal with the anxiety, perhaps think about all the other things you will be learning instead?

 

I remember my mandatory health class in High School (I presume you are in High School for some reason..) The sexual health chapter was mostly a very clinical look at how it works, mentions of other sexualities, the important of safety, and the many sexual diseases you can get if you are not careful. The only thing that really bothered me was the sexual diseases. I just didn't look at the pictures. I just remembered the material.

 

But I learned many, many other things in that class. I remember at the end of the semester we had to write an essay and do a power-point presentation on any health matter we wanted. I chose the danger of stress, because I'm a very anxious individual. I remember my younger brother told me he chose to do his project on the heart. I worked very hard on my project, and I remember being proud of my final result. We also took a field trip to the emergency room to find out how it operated.

 

So instead of worrying about perhaps the few lectures that will make you anxious, think about the more interesting lectures you will have instead!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Nowhere Girl
On 2.11.2017 at 10:46 PM, That Scary Black Cat said:

I think it's because most of us know, even if someone is repulsed, the reasons why sexual health classes are important. Things can change in a person's life too, people can lose their repulsed nature surrounding sex and partake or enjoy having sex.

Being sex-repulsed or sex-averse is a valid option.

 

Again: I really consider the feeling that I wouldn't want to want to have sex more important and more defining than just the basic fact of not wanting sex.

Fortunately for such situations, I'm not sex-repulsed. I don't have adverse reactions to sexual stuff as long as it doesn't apply to me, so I wouldn't have a lot of problems. (Sex ed still can't be introduced in Poland because of our extremely conservative government, in my school time there was no sex ed either, but judging from what I did on other lessons - I'd be eager and not afraid to sabotage the dominant narrative by sneaking feminism and asexuality.) But I would never want to get rid of my sex aversion, I would never want to start wanting sex and I hope it will never happen to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
CosineTheChristmasCat
2 hours ago, Nowhere Girl said:

Being sex-repulsed or sex-averse is a valid option.

I never said that these are not valid options. 

 

Speaking from personal experience and experiences from some of the conversations and years I've spent on AVEN, I'm saying that things can change. I, at one point in my life, was very sex adverse nearing repulsed. I broke down and cried in a sexual situation, I got sick, etc. However, I had experiences that changed that and now I am very sex-positive as well as sexually active. 

I clearly stated that things can change, it doesn't mean they will for the OP. It's important for people to understand sex-ed and, hopefully, more than "abstinence is key" because that's bull for the students needing proper sex-ed. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now