vmdraco Posted October 30, 2017 Share Posted October 30, 2017 Okay um... yeah. Yeah I have no idea where to place this. Sorry if this is too much or in the wrong place. This sort of thing isn't easy to talk about and if I make anyone uncomfortable please let me know. Spoiler I guess one thing I am most worried about, if and when T is an option for me, is the bottom growth. I do not want it at all. I've searched places that talk about it, and am told the changes that will happen specifically, and I have even seen pictures and it's making me nervous. I do not want it at all. The dysphoria I have for my voice and body fat distribution is ridiculous and I know going on T will relieve that, but after seeing images of trans men with the growth it has seriously made me reconsider my decision to go on T someday. I know the bottom growth is unavoidable and despite a low dosage on T it will happen regardless. I'm torn on my decisions and what I need for myself. I'm starting to feel that top surgery is an option that I can weigh readily instead, but that process does take longer to achieve because of how insanely expensive it is. It upsets me greatly and I guess I'm just unsure on how to approach it on an emotional and physical level. I'm also just confused as to why I feel that bottom growth is such a deal breaker. I feel like less of a guy for feeling that way, even though I know it doesn't define me or my identity. Since going on T is involved with said bottom growth, though, it weighs on me how much I disliked the downstairs part of it. I feel it's because the downstairs area is such a sensitive part of the body so any noticeable changes to it would come as a shock, even if you're expecting it. I just don't mind my downstairs, I don't want it to change, and that's what sucks the most. The thought of having what I've seen in the pictures makes me incredibly uncomfortable and I hate that it does. Part of me is curious of how I would feel once it happens, but overall it doesn't appeal to me. I guess what I'm asking for is that, if you didn't want bottom growth before, and started T regardless, was it uncomfortable and do you not want any part of it now, or did you begrudgingly get used to it despite the changes? Or did you find that you didn't mind and love it? I know everyone is different, I'm just wondering how it would feel. I don't see a lot of topics, at least in general, talking about downstairs growth as something to not look forward to and I just wanted an outside opinion from people who have experienced it. This is likely something to discuss with a therapist as well, which is something I plan on, too, however I find that opinions from other trans people could help silence any doubts I have and reassure me that I'm not alone. Thank you for reading, I'm sorry if this was a lot, hence why I put the damn thing in a spoiler because it's just a bit embarrassing lmfao I'm going to regret this wheezes Link to post Share on other sites
Chardog Posted October 31, 2017 Share Posted October 31, 2017 Finasteride inhibits bottom growth. Link to post Share on other sites
vmdraco Posted October 31, 2017 Author Share Posted October 31, 2017 50 minutes ago, Chardog said: Finasteride inhibits bottom growth. So... I just take it while on T and it won't cause a lot of growth? Huh. Now I feel dumb for making an entire thread about this. why is this never mentioned anywhereeeee Link to post Share on other sites
Mezzo Forte Posted October 31, 2017 Share Posted October 31, 2017 9 hours ago, vmdraco said: So... I just take it while on T and it won't cause a lot of growth? Huh. Now I feel dumb for making an entire thread about this. why is this never mentioned anywhereeeee Finasteride to my knowledge blocks/reduces DHT production, which is the subset of testosterone responsible for facial hair development, bottom growth, and male pattern baldness. That said, I don't know if you need a prescription for it, but to really prevent bottom growth, you'd probably need to take the stuff immediately because of how quickly growth happens after starting T. You'd probably have to taken Finasteride indefinitely to maintain that effect, and I don't know how long they recommend taking it. (Plus, I don't know if it prevents bottom growth entirely or just slows it down. That might be something to look into so you could know for sure.) In regards to your original conversation, bottom growth was my biggest hesitance going on T, and I completely understand why it could be a dealbreaker. For me, I was mostly neutral to the lower half of my body. It's an easy enough body part to just ignore, so the risk was that HRT would take a part of my body I was neutral about and potentially turn it dysphoric if I was wrong and do so permanently. Ironically, it ended up being one of the more positive changes HRT brought me. Spoiler The photos online can be intimidating, but most the time, I think you're seeing the more extreme cases. My growth never extended beyond the labia, so you wouldn't know I had downstairs growth if you just saw me standing around without pants on. There also more variance to that part of the body than I honestly realized pre-T, so some of the guys whose growth protrudes may have shorter/smaller labias or something. There will also be a difference between when the growth is erect or flaccid, so you might be seeing others' downstairs growth at its absolute biggest. It's hard to predict how downstairs growth will turn out, so there's a lot of risk involved if there's something you don't want to happen with downstairs growth. I personally went from hoping the growth would be minimal to hoping that it's still growing because I want metoidioplasty and I want to at least be able to clear my pant fly to pee standing up post-op. Link to post Share on other sites
vmdraco Posted October 31, 2017 Author Share Posted October 31, 2017 6 hours ago, Mezzo Forte said: Finasteride to my knowledge blocks/reduces DHT production, which is the subset of testosterone responsible for facial hair development, bottom growth, and male pattern baldness. That said, I don't know if you need a prescription for it, but to really prevent bottom growth, you'd probably need to take the stuff immediately because of how quickly growth happens after starting T. You'd probably have to taken Finasteride indefinitely to maintain that effect, and I don't know how long they recommend taking it. (Plus, I don't know if it prevents bottom growth entirely or just slows it down. That might be something to look into so you could know for sure.) In regards to your original conversation, bottom growth was my biggest hesitance going on T, and I completely understand why it could be a dealbreaker. For me, I was mostly neutral to the lower half of my body. It's an easy enough body part to just ignore, so the risk was that HRT would take a part of my body I was neutral about and potentially turn it dysphoric if I was wrong and do so permanently. Ironically, it ended up being one of the more positive changes HRT brought me. Hide contents The photos online can be intimidating, but most the time, I think you're seeing the more extreme cases. My growth never extended beyond the labia, so you wouldn't know I had downstairs growth if you just saw me standing around without pants on. There also more variance to that part of the body than I honestly realized pre-T, so some of the guys whose growth protrudes may have shorter/smaller labias or something. There will also be a difference between when the growth is erect or flaccid, so you might be seeing others' downstairs growth at its absolute biggest. It's hard to predict how downstairs growth will turn out, so there's a lot of risk involved if there's something you don't want to happen with downstairs growth. I personally went from hoping the growth would be minimal to hoping that it's still growing because I want metoidioplasty and I want to at least be able to clear my pant fly to pee standing up post-op. Yeah definitely something I can look up or talk to once I have the resources and time to make appointments. Right now I can't because I'm still in school, but something I will take note of in the future and something I have considered anyway, because I don't know if I'll get my mother's side where I will go bald or if I got my dad's side where I'll have a full head of hair by 60 lol So I was considering some kind of medication to take to avoid major hair loss, and the fact that said meds also contribute to bottom growth is a bonus in my situation. Spoiler That makes sense. Places that I saw those images where tumblr blogs that had to do with "naked ftm's" or something so that probably included some nsfw material that it was intended for. I found the images from a support blog for trans people if they were curious about what it would look like, hence why they linked them there at all. Thank you for putting me to rest about that, I feel silly now for thinking T will make me grow a functional micro penis or some shit. Link to post Share on other sites
binary suns Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 voice change is permanent, if that is one thing that matters it's possible to go on the T+Fina combo for short-term to get the voice change, then stop T and Fina and idk. does this make sense? probably good to consult an endocrinologist about this. Link to post Share on other sites
vmdraco Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 1 hour ago, float on said: voice change is permanent, if that is one thing that matters it's possible to go on the T+Fina combo for short-term to get the voice change, then stop T and Fina and idk. does this make sense? probably good to consult an endocrinologist about this. Hmm I see your point, but stopping T means a return of feminizing features despite the voice drop being permanent. While I don't mind that people get confused about what to call me (I find it kind of hilarious that people are so concerned about it), I wanted the default to be male when you first look at me. More often then not when people don't know what I am, they default to female no matter what, and that's a big part of my dysphoria as well. Stopping T means the higher possibility of being misgendered and being treated like a woman. But you're right, talking with an endocrinologist is something that I plan on, though due to personal circumstances I have to do it on my own terms and squeezing it in when I can before I'm out of state for school again. I don't know if I need permission from a psychologist just to talk to an endocrinologist about hormones and its affects, so I will def give those nearby a call Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.