About wearing a ring

[Random User]

Hi everyone !
I identify as an asexual since almost two months and wanted to wear a black ring, but since I live with my mom (who knows that I'm unsure of being bi or gay but  doesn't know about my asexuality), I don't know how to explain to her why I want to buy/wear one. Also, I'd like to mention that I never wore any ring, I usually don't like jewelry but, for me, it's a symbol, something that remind that there's people like me, that I'm not "broken" and also being noticed by other aces.

So thanks in advance for answers and sorry again if I made mistakes ^^

[LeChat]

Hello!

 

Is there such a thing as school student rings in France, where students, including males, have an option of buying a ring with their schools' mascot or insignia? Are males in professional sport's teams sometimes given rings as part of winning first place? These are traditions in the U.S., but I thought if they also occurred in France, then perhaps, you could point that out to your mother, that, since male students and professional athletes wear rings, that you wanted to wear one, too (a black one,) that it's normal, etc.

 

[Random User]

Just now, InquisitivePhilosopher said:

Hello!

 

Is there such a thing as school student rings in France, where students, including males, have an option of buying a ring with their schools' mascot or insignia? Are males in professional sport's teams given rings as part of winning first place? These are traditions in the U.S., but I thought if they also occurred in France, then perhaps, you could point that out to your mother, that, since male students and professional athletes wear rings, that you wanted to wear one, too (a black one,) that it's normal, etc.

 

Well, that would be an awesome idea but, first, I don't have this in my school and everyone knows that I'm clearly not interested in sports. ^^

I think that I'll just buy a ring with my account and tell her it's a friend gift, and hope she won't ask any other question.

But thanks, it was a really good idea

[ReyGraves]

If you don’t want to tell her about being ace you could say they’re friendship rings (Like friendship bracelets). If you tell her it’s a gift for a friend she might wonder why you were wearing it. 

[banoffeepie]

Hey Hi .. great English I'm impressed.

 

I would just say it's Japan Manga thing .. she'll never know.

 

 

[Random User]

2 minutes ago, ReyGraves said:

If you don’t want to tell her about being ace you could say they’re friendship rings (Like friendship bracelets). If you tell her it’s a gift for a friend she might wonder why you were wearing it. 

I'll surely do that, but I forgot something that's quite important, she's the one who checks the mail :/

I'll say that a friend bought this online for me since we can't see each other ^^

4 minutes ago, banoffeepie said:

Hey Hi .. great English I'm impressed.

 

I would just say it's Japan Manga thing .. she'll never know.

Well, not that great ^^

Why not, I just hope she won't check anything on the internet since she does that way too often ^^

[LeChat]

@Random User Oh. I forgot to mention that I like your avatar. It's a dog, right, and not a wolf?

 

I like the ideas @ReyGraves and @banoffeepie came up with. I hope those work for you.

 

@banoffeepie's right about your English. It's not that bad; it's almost perfect, actually: only around two, small errors in your first post, but that's no big deal because we can still understand you.

[Random User]

Just now, InquisitivePhilosopher said:

@Random User Oh. I forgot to mention that I like your avatar. It's a dog, right, and not a wolf?

 

I like the ideas @ReyGraves and @banoffeepie came up with. I hope those will work for you.

 

@banoffeepie's right about your English. It's not that bad; it's almost perfect, actually.

Well, it's a Shiba Inu, also a huge source for memes 
Well, thanks but it's not almost perfect, I still have progress to do, mainly my prononciation which is hopefully not a problem here ^^

[LeChat]

You're right. Your pronounciation isn't a problem here because we can't hear how you pronounce the words; I imagine @banoffeepie, like me, was talking about your English writing being pretty good.

[Stheg]

I'd imagine she probably wouldn't notice and might not think anything about it. I wear a very limited amount of jewelry and no one has ever asked me about my black ring asexual or otherwise. Granted, I live in a super conservative area, but even my mother hasn't noticed and she is usually quite perceptive about things.

[Lifesaver]

To be fair, when asked about my new ring I just said 'I like it'. No one in my life has questioned it past that. I only regularly wore my university ring before that. However, my being female may have impacted that.

[The_Reluctant_Dragon]

I really want a black ace ring. I plan on getting one next year so I can wear it throughout high school.

[A_Osmyde]

If you haven't got it yet, what you could do is get a ring that has multiple meanings, so you have one or more excuses for wearing it. In my case, I have a black tungsten band with a symbol engraved on it. The black band is the ace ring, of course, but the fact that it's tungsten lets me use the excuse that its part of my element collection (I like chemistry), and the symbol has personal significance. So whenever anybody asks about it and I don't want to come out, I have scapegoats. Have any interests you could tie into your ring?

[Random User]

9 hours ago, A_Osmyde said:

If you haven't got it yet, what you could do is get a ring that has multiple meanings, so you have one or more excuses for wearing it. In my case, I have a black tungsten band with a symbol engraved on it. The black band is the ace ring, of course, but the fact that it's tungsten lets me use the excuse that its part of my element collection (I like chemistry), and the symbol has personal significance. So whenever anybody asks about it and I don't want to come out, I have scapegoats. Have any interests you could tie into your ring?

I haven't choosen one yet, but I wanted to order a cheap one off Aliexpress, it's the symbol that matters for me, I don't like jewelery (and I'm also quite broke right now sooo). ^^

I think that I'll just say that I wear it beacause I like it, I don't think that anybody have to justify his choice of what he wears ^^

[Lotta_Biscotti]

Well, I bought a ring I really like, and usually as soon as I point out that there's something secret about it (the design, which is almost impossible to see except in bright sunlight, that it's 'cool' is enough justification to wear it. The real secret here is that it's an ace marker, and passes just as well as anything else.

 

If you don't want to come out to allo people with the ring, just say it was a gift (...from yourself) or tell them some cool facts about tungsten. Tungsten is fashionable, IMO, and you don't really need an excuse to wear something you like. As you say-- liking it is enough.

[gisiebob]

tell here its a satanism thing and that 'you are doing the satanism now' (hopefully you can catch how poorly worded I wrote that, as in be super sarcastic about it)

[goose121]

On 10/15/2017 at 9:01 PM, Lifesaver said:

To be fair, when asked about my new ring I just said 'I like it'. No one in my life has questioned it past that. I only regularly wore my university ring before that. However, my being female may have impacted that.

I did the same here. One person once questioned it, but it was a while ago and not particularly mean-spirited (more just nosy). Granted, I'm in a fairly liberal environment and whatnot, but guys sometimes also wear rings just because

[Lifesaver]

Mom actually just mentioned that she 'kinda like(s) that black thing on (my) hand. I have yet to tell her why it is there, but nice to onow it is becoming part if my aesthetic. 

Edited January 7, 2018 by Lifesaver
I crossed out my answer somehow?

[Chimeric]

On 10/19/2017 at 12:00 PM, Random User said:

I think that I'll just say that I wear it beacause I like it, I don't think that anybody have to justify his choice of what he wears ^^

That works!

 

If you are concerned about wearing it on your finger ,maybe you could wear it around your neck? You'd have some freedom to tuck it under your shirt if you were in a situation that made you uncomfortable.

 

One of my guy friends wears a ring on a string around his neck. I think it's because his girlfriend bought him a size too small and he wanted to wear it, anyway (oops =) ). The string is black and pretty thick, and it doesn't hang too low, so it comes off as looking very "manly." 

[Aroace...Artimus]

Well, maybe ask a friend to buy you one and then pay them back. That’s what I did, but, I can’t wear it yet, since I’m not out to my friend yet (I told her the ring was for my sister).