I dont know if I am aroace but I am not sure, can somebody help me please?

[xxKalaxx]

Hi! So, I've just gotten together with a guy, and its the first time its really gotten serious? The thing is though, that he is completely in love and happy and wants to have a life together and I just dont feel anything? Like, if we kiss while watching a movie, I just want to get back to the movie. Also, the thought of going all the way, as well as anything related to doing the do ( also vajajas and male bananas) seems kind of disgusting to me? Whenever he wants to try something I just dont care about it and it's kind of boring to me. I dont know, up until now, every single relationship I had went like this. Could you guys please tell me of your experiences and if you think I am aro, ace, both or nothing? Thank you in advance!!!!

[HonoraryJedi]

Hey, I have a somewhat similar experience. I got together with a guy I had all the affection for. I knew myself to be ace, and was questioning romanticism (but I thought so much about him I though, maybe this must be romantic?), and told him as much. He was apparently cool with it, but it was pretty clear he wanted a 'normal' romantic relationship, and I was pretty immediately uncomfortable. And so I broke it off after I think a couple of moths. (This was long distance, so I had a lot more space to think than I think I would if we were at the same place).

 

While this might be a sign that you (or I) are not interested in this one specific guy, I took it as a sign that I really was aromantic. This because I had already questioned it, and this was the only time I had come near romantic feelings. What I know is that you are not really into this guy, and probably should break up.

19 minutes ago, xxKalaxx said:

The thing is though, that he is completely in love and happy and wants to have a life together and I just dont feel anything?

I think that is all the information you need on that. And if it is the case with all your relationships, then yes, that starts to sound like aromanticism. Though, I must assume you get into these relationships in the first place for a reason? You say they all end up like this, but is that how they start?

[NerotheReaper]

Welcome to AVEN

 

Well you should think about why you got with this guy, because usually when someone enters a relationship there is a reason. An end goal per say, so that is something you should consider. Maybe you liked him in the beginning, then the passion died out and now you just don't feel the excitement this happens a lot of people of all sexualities. You don't need to share why you got with him, just think about why you are with him and if you really want it. 

 

Here is a useful thread about romantic and aromantic attraction, and hopefully you can find some answers and learn more about attraction. Also don't be afraid to talk and be open with this guy. 

 

[Guest Deus Ex Infinity]

4 hours ago, xxKalaxx said:

Hi! So, I've just gotten together with a guy, and its the first time its really gotten serious? The thing is though, that he is completely in love and happy and wants to have a life together and I just dont feel anything? Like, if we kiss while watching a movie, I just want to get back to the movie. Also, the thought of going all the way, as well as anything related to doing the do ( also vajajas and male bananas) seems kind of disgusting to me? Whenever he wants to try something I just dont care about it and it's kind of boring to me. I dont know, up until now, every single relationship I had went like this. Could you guys please tell me of your experiences and if you think I am aro, ace, both or nothing? Thank you in advance!!!!

I actually think that there's a vey high possibility that you're aro, especially since it seems to have happened a couple of times in the past before. Sounds like a general issue but being connected to your current partner only. I think you should try to talk things over to maybe end the relationship for the better. Otherwise he might end up feeling jected and disappointed in the long run.