My partner is fraysexual, and I'm demisexual. What do I do?

[Anthony A]

Hey there everyone,

 

I really need help. I'm fairly new to all this and discovered this site a couple of days ago. I don't know what to do about my situation.

 

I'm in a gay relationship with my partner, and we've been having fights that always seem to center around sex. After doing some research, I found out that he's in fact fraysexual (or possibly even graysexual) whereas I am demisexual. I have to have an emotional connection with someone in order to have sex. Since I love him so much, it's easy for me to have sex. But for him, he's said he sex isn't a big priority for him.

 

I want and need sex, at least once a week. And I've tried to compromise and not pressure him into doing it or ask him. Only when he's ready. Thing is he rarely asks for it and I'm kind of sitting there waiting and hoping, meanwhile sexual urges are brewing and then we fight.

 

What can I do about this situation?

 

Thanks so much for your help. It would mean the world to me.

[Annie9]

I honestly don't know any useful advice i can give you. Have you talked to him properly about this? I honestly think you guys should sit down and calmly talk about your feelings with each other. You guys should talk about your relationship and your desires. 

I suck at relationships, but i do know that both should be happy and feel good in a relationship. It's not gonna end up well with just you compromising so that your boyfriend feels good, he's gonna have to also compromise. 

I feel like I really ain't good with giving advice to people so I'm not sure if I was of much help to you but i really do think you two should seriously talk it out with each other.  

Good luck!!!