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The Question of Attraction (i.e. wut dis?)


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Attraction has always puzzled me. I've spent countless hours talking to my more sexually inclined friends about it, hearing they're experiences of attraction, what it was like dating, etc. Though none of it seemed to really help give many any greater understanding of attraction. The only "feeling" or "thought"  that is in any way similar is that sometimes I'll be strangely *interested* in someone that I see on my college campus or that's in one of my classes. I wouldn't call it a magnetizing force of any kind, just a twitching curiosity regarding specific individuals, like I want to get to know them, hear their story but nothing really beyond that. Though I should probably mention that more often than not these individuals are in the LGBTQA+ "spectrum of spectrums". Has anyone else had similar feelings or experiences, is this just a natural "gravitation" towards those similar to myself or something else entirely. I should also mention that I'm very introverted and don't fully understand the mechanics of how socializing works. 

 

I would be more than grateful for any insight in to the above and/or generally anything regarding attraction and being asexual. 

 

(Also I'm new to AVEN so hello!)

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Hello and welcome, Ka'el. :cake:

 

Have you noticed the sticky thread in this forum? ;-)

http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/69810-what-is-sexual-attraction/

 

I also like this classification of attractions:

http://wiki.asexuality.org/Attraction

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Hi can't relate too much but I'll say 'Hi' anyway. :cake:  @roland.o has done some great work on the links as usual :D

Ii would be attracted to the look of certain girls, but so few compared to my friends. For them anyone would do, and I would only see one or two a year that would catch my attention, and then I have no sexual desire .. I was just preoccupied by thinking about them loads.

Fast forward to now and my daughter has no recognition or empathy with other people's feelings and doesn't really get many of the emotions others take for granted.

We never took her to see if a disorder was present because we didn't want her stigmatised or in a special school or anything. But as a parent I know something is not there that should be, but she just needs stuff explaining to try and fit in.

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I can sort of relate to that, I think. I mean, I can appreciate someone's looks and say they're attractive by typical standards, but it means nothing to me in the end. Kind of like detached observing of what is, rather than feeling actual attraction of that kind towards them. And my best friend does happen to fall on the spectrum, which I've only found out recently, so I guess birds of a feather do indeed flock together? :D

Also, welcome by the way :cake:

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