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What age did you discover you were asexual?


Apersonontheinternet

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When I was 19 I attended uni's LGBT+ group for the first time and someone introduced herself as being panro ace. 

The following semester I realized I was asexual (after trying out ID'ing as demisexual for a week or two).

 

And now after ID'ing as ace for the past nearly 3 years I've got too much purple sitting in my closet.

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weijiangling
43 minutes ago, Lanti SF said:

And now after ID'ing as ace for the past nearly 3 years I've got too much purple sitting in my closet.

There's no such thing as too much purple.

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time traveller jedi

I learned what asexual meant when I was 14, but I began to identify as ace at age 15. 

 

58 minutes ago, Lanti SF said:

I've got too much purple sitting in my closet.

 PURPLE FOR THE WIN 💜

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Anny O. Mous

I remember being disgusted by the boys who used to kiss my cheeks in first grade.  Boys were just gross cooty magnets back then.  As I grew older, I felt admiration and affection for people but nothing particularly romantic or sexual.  I'm still not sure what my identity is quite yet...

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People started labelling themselves things like pan at the age of 12ish. Being the youngest in the year group maybe had something to do with it, so at 11, when asked my sexuality, I just said ace, fully aware it might change. Now I'm grey-sexual (self-fulfilling prophecy? Label determinism?) and in my early teens. But sexuality seems like a fluid concept to me, so I simply go with 'queer' or 'don't like labels'/'prefer not to say'.

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Quality_Penguins

I found out about the term around age 16 (I'm 18 now), but I had never had any interest in sex. I remember finding out sexual attraction was a thing that existed and just being like "What the heck is wrong with other people how much time do they waste thinking about sex". So the identity fit right away after I realized what most other people were like, much to my disgust.

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swirl_of_blue

I first heard about term some time in my teens, and I think I started to identify as ace around 17 or 18, having previously though I was just a late bloomer. Now I'm 26 and starting to realise that I maybe never was ace, but actually my "first instinct" WAS right and I am a late bloomer! Probably that blooming won't go any further than grey or demi, but I don't really feel ace anymore. This, and having a couple of very late bloomer friends (sexuality emerging around or after turning 20), has made me really skeptical of people who are 100% sure of their orientation in their teens...

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Strange But Not a Stranger

I first read about asexuality when I was in my 20s. It rang a few bells, but I didn't identify as ace yet then. It was just something that was always there in the back of my mind, while I was waiting for myself to "bloom late". :lol: That never happened.

I have only recently started to really identify as asexual, and it feels good. Liberating in a way as well. Like I had this big weight on my shoulders for all these years and it finally fell off.

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About a year ago after I was getting out of college. I had always wondered why I never gave a crap about romance and sex and I stumbled across asexuality through Google and TV Tropes. It fit too well not to be me. Never dated, never had sex, was and still is an absolute failure at recognizing flirting, topped off with a healthy dose of cynicism about romance in general due to being a child of divorce. I was never more convinced about anything in my entire life. 

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I think I first thought I was at age 12-13, but wasn't certain until age 14-15. 

 

I always knew I wasn't interested in a relationship, though. I just didn't know the term for it.

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I first heard of asexuality when I was 16 and thought it resonated with me, but I wasn't sure and didn't identify as asexual until a few years later. Looking back, I would say I was asexual back then and could have identified if I wasn't so confused.

I don't think 14 is too young.

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I was...probably 19? All the time before that I figured I was just a 'straight woman who had no interest in relationships'

 

 

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In middle school when everyone was getting dates and started talking about sex and stuff I just figured I was a late bloomer then freshman year of high school (so I would have been 14-15) the lunch table conversation that day had somehow turned to being horny and I realized that I didn't get horny, even though several of the table people regularly were. Later in that same lunch group I heard the term asexual and about a year after that I had a "oh wait thats me isn't it?!" moment. So I was late 15/early 16 figuring it out.

 

Slightly off topic, of that freshman lunch group of about 7 people, 3 of us have come out as somewhere on the ace spectrum. So I guess our gaydars (or is it acedars?) were on point, even if none of us knew it at the time.

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I believe I was 16. It was by that time I was fed up with the idea that all guys wanted to copulate with anything that moved (since I wasn't that way) and started looking for an answer.

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Alejandrogynous

I started to realize there was something off about me around 18, I think. At first I thought it was a physical problem that sex was so unpleasant, and it took a few years after that to start suspecting there was something more behind it. Around 22, I stopped questioning and just settled for being broken. I didn't have the, 'holy crap, I'm asexual' moment until I was 25, about a year after I discovered AVEN.

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I was 44 when I first read about asexuality which explained my lack of interest in sex. Almost 56.

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I was in my 20s by the time I accepted asexual as my orientation. I never heard the term asexual until my late teens and I assumed it didn't apply to me because I grew up in a culture that says everyone who doesn't have a sex drive will magically get one once they get married. Looking back, I realize I've been asexual as long as I can remember. I was very vocal about my asexual feelings as a teen, I just assumed they would go away when I got married.

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17. I'd always known I was different, but didn't discover the term and realise why until then. 
I'm 28 now. :lol:

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HufflepuffSupreme
On 28 September 2017 at 4:14 PM, Apersonontheinternet said:

Me, just recently... I am almost 14, too young? Phsss... High school is a weird place, all I have to say.

I'm actually realy pissed at some of my ex-friends because at about the same age I had my sexuality figured out. 

 

Then one of my 'friends' told me that is wasn't a thing, alikened me to a bacteria (which, by the way, is BS. bacteria use binary fission)  and convinced me that I was not, in fact, asexual. Just a 'late bloomer'.

 

GARRGH! I wish I could talk to smol me. 

 

So long story short. No, you are not too young. If anyone says otherwise tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine.

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98slbrookes98

I found the word when I was 17 but I knew what I wanted (romantic relationships with women but without sex) from the age of 9.

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AncientAmateur

this year, age 25. Probably would have worked it out sooner (the signs were all there) but I hadn't heard of asexuality up until earlier this year :)

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Red Sun Rises

About 20/21ish.  I mean, I realized that I was different from everyone else since I was a kid, but had no name to put to it.

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I was 17 when I first considered I might be Ace, but it took until I was 20 (or thereabouts) to actually recognize that I was asexual. My advice is that sexual orientation (or lack thereof) isn't a straightjacket; if you think you're asexual, and you decide to identify as such, but later decide that it doesn't really fit, then you're free to identify as something else. As far as I'm concerned, human sexuality is a broad spectrum, and so the only practical use for labels is to find people you identify with, and if you think that group might be aces, then go for it.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I didn't really understand asexuality until I was 23, and the very same day I learned what asexuality was really about was when I realized I was ace. If I had known about asexuality earlier, I would have known I was ace when I was 18, and possibly younger than that.

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