Newly "out" ace here; hello!

[HopeBena]

Hi everyone. My name is Hope and I'm 34. I have never in my life felt sexual attraction to anyone, but for some reason I didn't realize that I am asexual until a couple of years ago. It's funny, but even though I knew deep down I was different, I kind of didn't think about it much? I've had serious relationships lots of times in my life, and I willingly participated in sexual activity because that's just what you do when you're in a relationship, not because I felt any desire for it. Finally a couple of years ago I saw something online about asexuality and it just clicked - THIS was me! And I wasn't alone! But I didn't talk to anyone about it for a long time. Finally, after months of kind of sitting on this "secret," I brought it up with my husband. Now, several months later, we've decided to divorce after 8 years of marriage. My asexuality plays a part in that, but it's a fairly small part. I feel frustrated sometimes, because I feel like, if I had realized this about myself in the beginning, I could've been honest with him and maybe we would have avoided some disappointment along the way. But I've decided to start telling people in my life, because I feel like it's important that people who are close to me know about this part of my identity, and because I feel like more awareness and visibility can only help. I still get very nervous every time I bring it up, but I've started with people I know love me and will always love me, and so far their reaction has been fine. But since I am going through a stressful time with the end of my marriage, I thought it might be helpful to find a supportive community who understands where I'm coming from, and that it might help me to offer support to others along the way, so here I am. I hope to get to know some of you and learn more about this journey we're all on. Thanks for listening; talk to you all soon!

[TheAP]

Hello there, and welcome to AVEN! 

As part of my welcome to you, I'd like to point out some important threads that might be helpful in your first few days here.  The Terms of Service is here. We recommend you read it over, and if you have any questions please don't hesitate to send either myself or any other administrator or moderator (the "admod" team, as we're called) a message.  Also, there's a handy forum called Site Info, which has some useful information including a thread outlining who moderates which forum. If you ever need something done in or have questions about a specific forum, please message the mod of that forum. And if you have problems with the site in general, or any single member, please message any admod. 

The following are also nifty links to take a look at:  Welcome Lounge Mini Manual | Welcoming 101 | Quick Guide to the Forums | Asexuality FAQ's

 Again, welcome to AVEN and I hope your stay is everything you hoped!

 

 

[Lichley]

Welcome! Take your time to come out to people, don't rush into it, look some things up that the might ask about when you tell them, so that you feel better prepared. Cake and good luck!