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He's crushing on me, and I'm squishing on him


OpenAce

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So, I've got a squish on one of my friends. I just found out he has a crush on me.

Any advice? He's the closest person who I'd consider looking into a QPR with, but we're still too young to I act on it...

I tell him lots of personal stuff. I really want a dating kinda relationship but plutonic- like QPR dating...

thanks

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Hm, the best way I would deal with a situation like that is to tell him how you feel about dating and that you are only really looking for a QPR, because if he's ok with that, great, go ahead. But if not then its a case of you havent actually started dating so you can just say "might be better to stay friends"

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not much else to do but what Vicky suggested. give it a shot and talk to him about it. never hurts to try, right?

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Exactly :) besides, if he doesn't like the idea but agrees to stay friends, thats fine, but if he doesn'y want to be friends afterwards because of what you think about dating then you are cutting out a toxic person from your life.

Good luck :cake:

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thanks all.

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This sounds like my relationship with one of my best friends. 

Long story short two years ago I found out that he had a MAJOR crush on me, and I liked him too (I didn't know I was Demi then). We just left it at that, being friends, until last year when we had a few classes together and really got to know each other.

I happen to be a grade ahead of him and now that I'm in high school and he's still and eighth grader we've decided to wait until next year to "officially" start dating, but he means the world to me and I really hope that dating works out (I think he might be ace spectrum). He was one of the first people I came out to as Demi and I don't know what I would do without him. I know that your situation may be different, but I also know reading relatable forums on AVEN has helped me more than I can explain. 

So just a final note: a romantic relationship can be many things, but above all it's a friendship. I hope things work out for you:*

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Ignore my last post, things fell apart last night. All I can say is to remember that friendship is not worth less than a romantic/dating relationship, (I'm working to remember this now). I hope things work out for you:)

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On 9/7/2017 at 0:20 PM, OpenAce said:

So, I've got a squish on one of my friends. I just found out he has a crush on me.

Any advice? He's the closest person who I'd consider looking into a QPR with, but we're still too young to I act on it...

I tell him lots of personal stuff. I really want a dating kinda relationship but plutonic- like QPR dating...

thanks

I've been in a similar situation where I've been drawn to and loved someone platonically, but he wanted a romantic and sexual relationship. The dissonance made thinks really difficult for a while as I couldn't force myself to be romantic and sexual and he couldn't be in a relationship without those aspects (ie. in a QPR) so we're just friends now. It's my personal opinion it would be difficult to be in a relationship where one person is queerplatonically orientated and the one is romantic and sexual. So maybe have a go but don't get your hopes to high. If you want to be in a QPR maybe look for other folks similarly orientated?

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  • 1 month later...

Thanks for your replies, he's no longer got a crush, and we're still friends:) and we're getting to know each other more which is great.

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