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sexual - but just visually


henpen82

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First off I'd like to state that i believe I am sexual as I do very much experience sexual attraction - and have a libido attached to that!

 

However I don't like or want partnered sex!  Its as though 95% of my sexuality is visual - I'm attracted, that body is a turn on! .....and thats it!

 

I don't want the touch aspect, someones body weight on me, someones body heat in my space, kissing is annoying and a bit gross (I hate saliva) - I'm into guys, but can't stand the feeling of stubble! 

I don't like pretty much any sexual sensation - such as oral sex, and to be honest - although I'm into guys - I'm not a fan of dick! 

 

does this mean i'm a voyeur? that I'm a sexual person - but just with lots of limits or that I'm more asexual? 

 

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You might be lithosexual - it's on the ace spectrum, as I understand, but lithosexuals have the attraction without actually wanting partnered sex. 

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There are different types of attraction, including aesthetic. Are you sure that you're experiencing the sexual kind?

http://wiki.asexuality.org/Attraction

AIUI, sexual attraction is not about what turns you on, but about whether you feel the desire to engage in sexual acts with the other.

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nanogretchen4

Hmm. Well, you can identify however you want. But it seems to me that if only asexuality had a desire based definition people like yourself who have no desire for partnered sex would have a word for their orientation, a community, and some visibility.

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From your description, I think there're a couple of possibilities. One is that you're experiencing another form of attraction instead of sexual attraction. Sexual attraction is a form of interpersonal attraction which involves forming sexual desires for other people. A second is that maybe you're forming sexual desires for other people, but there are aspects of sexual activities that you dislike which are preventing you from acting on those desires. There are plenty of people in the asexual community who are sex-repulsed in that way, and some still experience sexual attraction and sexual desire. Those people might use the label gray-asexual (like myself), or if they experience higher levels of sexual attraction/desire and feel more conflicted, they might consider themselves sex-repulsed sexuals.

I hope this information is useful. At the end of the day, it's your choice to determine what label works best for you.

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https://goodmenproject.com/gender-sexuality/a-new-sexual-dictionary-jvinc/

 

Does this sound like what you are going through?
"A gray-asexual is someone who does experience sexual attraction but very rarely or who experiences sexual attraction but never/rarely wants to actually go through with sex. Other variations of gray-asexuality include people who only experience sexual attraction in very specific circumstances that don’t regularly occur and people who experience sexual attraction regularly but have an extremely low libido." 

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