Jump to content

Things Asexuals hate to hear


Recommended Posts

Hermit Advocate

I know it's been said before but I feel like I need to say it:

 

"How do you know if you don't like it if you haven't tried it?"

 

Ugh.

  • Like 7
Link to post
Share on other sites
The Drafting Ninja
7 hours ago, Hey you in the corner said:

I know it's been said before but I feel like I need to say it:

 

"How do you know if you don't like it if you haven't tried it?"

 

Ugh.

That makes me want to reply in full on snark mode: "How do you know if you like it if you haven't tried it?"  Though I don't because that would make me the jerk.  The way I see it both questions are rude. <_<

Link to post
Share on other sites

It's not so much hate to hear as hate to see the smug amusement on the faces of a group of men who feel superior because they do what every sewer rat does better than them, and you don't do it at all.

  • Like 5
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 9/13/2017 at 7:13 PM, Keakin said:

Hahahahahhahahahahaha xD! You made my night❤  Believe me I still get extremely angry when I remember. That wasn't the first or last remark of its kind. You don't even KNOW. He IS "messed up".

Hahaha I'm glad! Good - you SHOULD be angry. For someone to say stuff like that about a fellow asexual is NOT okay. I will bust him in his FACE. 

 

It wasn't the last comment, huh. Why am I not surprised? I've gotten so used to the level of ignorance of a vast majority of the human race by now that I'm no longer completely nonplussed at how people come to such ridiculous conclusions when they're told their friend/family member/loved one is asexual. "so you're asexual? like a plant?" "uhhh... humans don't reproduce asexually." "i bet i could change that." (NO. YOU CAN'T. GET AWAY FROM ME YOUR BASTARD-NESS. YOU CREEP. YOU NEANDERTHAL. Out of all seriousness, though, this is such a messed up thing to say to someone. If someone told me this I would not hesitate to shove my foot six inches up their... well, you know. I mean, seriously - how DARE they make such barbaric claims! Disgusting.) "that doesn't exist." "you're lying - you're actually gay but you just want attention." "your poor husband/boyfriend!" "asexuals are just [ugly] people who can't get laid." "you must live a very sad, sad life." (No, actually, I don't. I'm living happily by MYSELF, going to bed ALONE, sleeping PEACEFULLY, not worrying about my boyfriend cheating - cuz I don't have one. YEET)

 

^ things I've read on this thread. Quite disappointing, actually. There's a club at my school called the "GSA", also known as the "Gay Straight Alliance" club. And as they introduced that, I thought to myself, "Why couldn't they call it 'GSAA'? The 'Gay Straight Asexual Alliance' club?" :(

 

Oh well. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
20 hours ago, Ciri said:

Well yeah. I've just taken my childhood abuser through the court system. He only has to serve 18 months in prison. 

Omg. I'm so sorry. It makes me angry. This system sucks. Keep fighting it, if we don't then no one will. I'm really sorry you had to go through that. You have my full support❤

Link to post
Share on other sites
Flowertheflower
19 minutes ago, chari-blom said:

 

^ things I've read on this thread. Quite disappointing, actually. There's a club at my school called the "GSA", also known as the "Gay Straight Alliance" club. And as they introduced that, I thought to myself, "Why couldn't they call it 'GSAA'? The 'Gay Straight Asexual Alliance' club?" :(

 

Oh well. 

Welp 

We dont even HAVE a GSA soooo youre pretty lucky anyway :/

Link to post
Share on other sites
21 minutes ago, chari-blom said:

 

^ things I've read on this thread. Quite disappointing, actually. There's a club at my school called the "GSA", also known as the "Gay Straight Alliance" club. And as they introduced that, I thought to myself, "Why couldn't they call it 'GSAA'? The 'Gay Straight Asexual Alliance' club?" :(

 

Oh well. 

Exactly why I never stay quiet when shitty people say shitty things. I put them in their place because they have absolutely NO right to tell me what I am or what I'm not. I correct them to slowly make the world more accepting of  diversity. I think this is an opportunity for you to bring it up on that club. You could do something great for us all and introduce people like us to your whole school community. Won't deny you'll probably receive some crap from ignorant people but that's the thing, that is the exact thinking you're trying to eradicate. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, chari-blom said:

There's a club at my school called the "GSA", also known as the "Gay Straight Alliance" club. And as they introduced that, I thought to myself, "Why couldn't they call it 'GSAA'? The 'Gay Straight Asexual Alliance' club?" :(

My high school changed the name to the Gender and Sexuality Alliance to be more inclusive. 

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 7/9/2017 at 3:20 PM, Dekpi said:

 

"Asexuality was never seen as a mental illness." (It was.)

"Asexuality never had any forced medical treatments." (It did.)

Asexuality can still be diagnosed under the DSM, labeled as 'Sexual Interest-Arousal Disorder (DSM-5)' or 'Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disoeder (DSM-4)' and treatments exist. 😳😳

 

Recently got told I am just too innocent and naive that's why, she asked if I thought I was supposed to be a nun or something- told her if I thought I was meant to be a nun I would be. Same person also asked about masturbation and porn, told me I just needed to loosen up maybe get drunk (this one I've gotten a lot). I rarely use the word 'asexuality' but have told people I have no interest. Generally get the well meaning but ignorant 'when you meet the one' or 'it's admirable to save yourself for marriage' or 'no need to be bashful, everyone fancies someone'

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

@Breathing.... ^hugs^ So sorry to hear that, that person seems to be really ignorant... like wtf, "just get drunk then you'll want it"!? It makes me cringe so much! Especially since I am touch averse and sex repulsed (and one reason being sexual assault when I was little) to me such stuff sounds as if that's "the only reason why I think I'm asexual". Yes being drunk surpresses my touch aversion and I get really huggy, but it still doesn't make me desire sex or anything. Such comments are why I'm scared of coming out to more people...

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
32 minutes ago, Quasar.w said:

@Breathing.... ^hugs^ So sorry to hear that, that person seems to be really ignorant... like wtf, "just get drunk then you'll want it"!? It makes me cringe so much! Especially since I am touch averse and sex repulsed (and one reason being sexual assault when I was little) to me such stuff sounds as if that's "the only reason why I think I'm asexual". Yes being drunk surpresses my touch aversion and I get really huggy, but it still doesn't make me desire sex or anything. Such comments are why I'm scared of coming out to more people...

Thanks, virtual hugs returned. I'm very touch averse and sex repulsed myself. I don't think my anxiety/uber self control/OCD will allow me to be 'drunk' or tipsy. I've tried, drank a LOT and no change whatsoever to me/my personality/functionality. But for all my issues it's what people advise.

People are ridiculous, but she was someone who I have no ties to and I was having a bad day so I answered all her questions, which I think took her by surprise.

 

By loved ones, I'm not out to, I've heard 'asexuality is weird and unnatural it just doesn't make any sense' or 'you can see that they [person on show, long hair and acne 17/18yo] have a hormonal issue, why are they giving them time of day'.

Yeah, I'm out to like 5 friends IRL.

Link to post
Share on other sites
22 minutes ago, Breathing.... said:

Thanks, virtual hugs returned. I'm very touch averse and sex repulsed myself. I don't think my anxiety/uber self control/OCD will allow me to be 'drunk' or tipsy. I've tried, drank a LOT and no change whatsoever to me/my personality/functionality. But for all my issues it's what people advise.

People are ridiculous, but she was someone who I have no ties to and I was having a bad day so I answered all her questions, which I think took her by surprise.

 

By loved ones, I'm not out to, I've heard 'asexuality is weird and unnatural it just doesn't make any sense' or 'you can see that they [person on show, long hair and acne 17/18yo] have a hormonal issue, why are they giving them time of day'.

Yeah, I'm out to like 5 friends IRL.

^thankfully takes virtual hugs^ it's interesting that for you being drunk doesn't really change anything, like in comparison to me who starts giving hugs to f.e. the barkeeper (an almost stranger). But honestly I don't like it and want to stop drinking too much just to overcome such issues, I've realized for myself that it's not really healthy (especially mental health). I think they mean no harm by giving you this advice but in my opinion it's not a good one! Idk but that's just my experience so far...

And about coming out, apparently I've sort of come out to a friend but the thing is I don't remember it.. which probably means I was very drunk (usually I remember everything), which is kinda scary and underlines my point above!

So just stay safe :) and don't let people make you feel too bad about being yourself!

Link to post
Share on other sites

1.)Did someone touch you? 

 

2.)Girl please you some dick in life. 

 

3.)How do you know unless you try it? 

 

4.)Maybe he didn't know what he was doing and you had one bad experience?

 

5.)Are you sure you don't like woman? 

 

6). Maybe it's just the fact your hormones are low.

 

7.) I think this whole asexual thing is made up. 

 

These things piss me off to hear. It's not made up and my hormones are normal. I don't like women I don't find them attractive. Yes I will sometimes say oh she's so pretty but other females say about Beyoncé. Why does it have to be oh you had a bad experience. The hell is that ! Why is it that it's always the other persons fault  or I'm traumatized now. I understand that 99% of the world is sexual but why can't they except the 1% qualities instead of making us doubt how we feel. Or think maybe I'm not normal. Seriously 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
Hermit Advocate

Does that mean you're super religious or something? 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Hey you in the corner said:

Does that mean you're super religious or something? 

Had this too... 

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, HEAD-N-THE-CLOUDS said:

???

I think they were giving an example of something an asexual hates to hear.

Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, TheAP said:

I think they were giving an example of something an asexual hates to hear.

lol yeah I caught on a little late 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites

"I can fix that"

 

...no eww that's gross.

  • Like 7
Link to post
Share on other sites
22 hours ago, Hey you in the corner said:

Does that mean you're super religious or something? 

Hahahahahhahaahahaha

You'd be surprised of what "super religious" people do when no one's looking.

 

I was in a Christian school and believe me, dear, they ain't no different than a hormonal teenager. Teachers included. Talking to 15 year olds about having to accept it and it being normal, and "You're gonna do it some day". Everything is a sin to them but when it comes to that...the things you'd hear them say. 

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 9/18/2017 at 8:52 AM, HEAD-N-THE-CLOUDS said:

1.)Did someone touch you? 

 

2.)Girl please you some dick in life. 

 

3.)How do you know unless you try it? 

 

4.)Maybe he didn't know what he was doing and you had one bad experience?

 

5.)Are you sure you don't like woman? 

 

6). Maybe it's just the fact your hormones are low.

 

7.) I think this whole asexual thing is made up. 

 

These things piss me off to hear. It's not made up and my hormones are normal. I don't like women I don't find them attractive. Yes I will sometimes say oh she's so pretty but other females say about Beyoncé. Why does it have to be oh you had a bad experience. The hell is that ! Why is it that it's always the other persons fault  or I'm traumatized now. I understand that 99% of the world is sexual but why can't they except the 1% qualities instead of making us doubt how we feel. Or think maybe I'm not normal. Seriously 

Because people are egotistic and can't seem to absorb that not everyone's like them. Come up with some pretty neat come backs with their same logic. That way they'll hear how stupid they sound. It's pretty damn satisfying and it usually works.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

I hate it sooo much when people talk about "sexy" things. E.g. we are doing an election rally every saturday (next week it is Bundestagswahl in Germany) and a female comrade talked about chippendales and such stuff and I just thought: Oh, my goodness, stop it please. just the thought of watching those guys appalled me. Same for female persons. I is not my cup of tea. I neeeed caaaake!

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 14/09/2017 at 3:08 PM, Hey you in the corner said:

I know it's been said before but I feel like I need to say it:

 

"How do you know if you don't like it if you haven't tried it?"

 

Ugh.

but the thing is that if we were interested in things like this, we would be interested in trying it, right?

if someone is not, it seems pretty obvious.

  • Like 3
Link to post
Share on other sites

I tried it. and I do it, because my spouse likes it. it is not an all bad feeling, but I can do without it completely. I actually do not need another person to feel the same actually... having sex is not fun for me, but I do it just because my spouse desires it. it is a matter of deep feeling for them. I love them very much, but I do not desire those things. But we have found a modus operandi about all this, sooo... I am not completely sexrepulsed, but I do not need it altogether to feel well...

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

I tried, too, but my bf seems to be doing pretty well without it, too (even though I know he would like to), so I don't feel pressured. maybe one day we will do it again, because why not, but in fact, I don't need to do such things to feel happy. and he knows I love him the most of all anyway. 

but I understand agreeing to compromise to make your partner happy.  as long as you don't feel forced.

in the subject, I don't like people who make stupid or offensive comments once they know I'm not into sex. including comments like "you're not a special snowflake". well, I don't even aim to be.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
On 9/14/2017 at 8:06 PM, Keakin said:

Exactly why I never stay quiet when shitty people say shitty things. I put them in their place because they have absolutely NO right to tell me what I am or what I'm not. I correct them to slowly make the world more accepting of  diversity. I think this is an opportunity for you to bring it up on that club. You could do something great for us all and introduce people like us to your whole school community. Won't deny you'll probably receive some crap from ignorant people but that's the thing, that is the exact thinking you're trying to eradicate. 

Yesterday one of my friends came out to me as bisexual. I was really happy. This conversation was brought up because I had asked her if she was a part of the GSA group. She was and it made me really happy to find someone I could relate to. Well, I mean, she wasn't asexual, so not really relate, but we had this whole conversation/rant about ignorant people, rather similar to this thread, actually, and she introduced me to a few of her friends (who were bi, pan, and gay). It was really cool :). I think you're right - I'm thinking about getting one of my friends to join the club with me. When they announced the opening of the club, they said that you could identify as heterosexual and still be a part of the club, which I think is really inclusive and I like that. So I want to sign up and talk about the asexual/aromantic spectrum without outright saying I am asexual, as I am not yet ready to come out. Ahhh I'm really excited!

Link to post
Share on other sites
On 9/15/2017 at 3:44 AM, TheAP said:

My high school changed the name to the Gender and Sexuality Alliance to be more inclusive. 

Ah I see! That's really cool! :D

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...