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Keakin

Things Asexuals hate to hear

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Keakin   
Keakin

 Every time we open up or simply clarify our preferences to people, their remarks usually make me roll my eyes until they're completely blank. And they're always the same. I have a bunch to list but I'll only put a few to get this started, cause I wanna know what you have to say.

 

1. Oh, you're young. You'll change your mind. 

[Um, I'm in my twenties so...If I had wanted to do something, I would've already done it -_- .]

 

2. Were you raped?

[The hell-no!]

 

3. You will never be happy without sex.

[Whatever, Brenda, sorry your relationship is only based on that.]

 

4. No one will ever wanna be with you.

[Because my happiness and world revolves around another person...]

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sithgirlix   
sithgirlix

How about "Oh, I used to be like that too, until ____" or "I know someone who was like that, but then ____". 

To me it's mostly sort of "you'll like it when you try it" but more of a "I have proof you'll like it when you try it".

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Skelegon   
Skelegon

"I feel like if I were asexual I'd be a LOT more productive."

 

No, you'd still be lazy. I guarantee it. 

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Ruru+Saphhy=Garnet   
Ruru+Saphhy=Garnet

"Asexuality doesn't exist"

Ugh.

"Asexuals are just ugly folks who can't get laid"

"You choose to be asexual"

"How can you know your asexual if you haven't had sex"

I hate when people say this ^^ it's like telling a straight dude "how do you know you're not gay unless you fucked a man" <_<

"How can you be asexual if you tried sex?"

"You're gonna be a lonely cat lady"

Hmmm....sounds kind of nice, actually.

"You're lying"

"Are you sick?!"

"Freak"

All these things I hate to hear.

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Alarica   
Alarica

Running on from the "how can you be asexual if you haven't had sex" I hate it when people try to discount your sexuality because of their preconceived ideas of what asexuality means.

I've had people say "But I thought you were asexual" and "You can't be asexual"..... after I kissed someone.

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Carson:)   
Carson:)

"Real men like sex"

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Shieldmaiden WinterDragon   
Shieldmaiden WinterDragon

*TRIGGER WARNING *

"You'll change your mind."

"You'll love it when you try it!"

"Don't worry,you'll change your mind."

"All asexuals need to be purged."

"Why don't I prove to you how it  feels?".

"Go jump off a cliff!"

 

I can come up with more but I'll leave them..... 

 

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Keakin   
Keakin
38 minutes ago, Carson:) said:

"Real men like sex"

Wow

THIS!

I think more than "How can you say you don't like it if you've never tried it", this makes me extremely angry and at the same time, I just think these people's IQs are very low. "Real men like sex" seriously! Extremely sexist. I feel like the next think they'll say is "Burn that witch, she just answered a science question!" 

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Keakin   
Keakin
37 minutes ago, Shieldmaiden WinterDragon said:

*TRIGGER WARNING *

"You'll change your mind."

"You'll love it when you try it!"

"Don't worry,you'll change your mind."

"All asexuals need to be purged."

"Why don't I prove to you how it  feels?".

"Go jump off a cliff!"

 

I can come up with more but I'll leave them..... 

 

Oh my god. So they're suggesting to rape you in other words. Yes, super triggered!

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dragon_nerd   
dragon_nerd

"Oh I can't wait for you to grow up and get married and have kids of your own"

This was AFTER I told my Mum that I am ace. 

Ugh

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Zectarash   
Zectarash

Me: "I'm ace."

 

About 1/5 of people I say this to: "So you're like bacteria/an amoeba/ a plant?" Usually bacteria. No idea why.

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Wish Bear 🌠   
Wish Bear 🌠

@Zectarash You could say, "No, I'm like a human." :P

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Euna   
Euna

"Maybe you're a late bloomer."  (Uh, nope.)

"Isn't he charming/handsome/attractive?"  (Romantically yes, sexually no.)

 

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Wish Bear 🌠   
Wish Bear 🌠

I don't have to hear anything from anyone because I don't tell them. :) 

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Sinfre   
Sinfre
21 minutes ago, Moon Spirit ☽ said:

I don't have to hear anything from anyone because I don't tell them. :) 

same for me.

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To Each Their Own   
To Each Their Own

when I told a friend of mine that I was asexual and that I hadn't had sex in over 15 years, he said, "I just want to crawl up your vagina right now and see what's going on."

 

at at least he didn't offer to change me. 

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Emanresu Yllisa   
Emanresu Yllisa

When playing never have I ever with some sorta friends, I mentioned that I was a virgin and had never dated anyone. Someone who knew I was ace remarked that he guessed I was a "true asexual, unlike [name]". Didn't know who this person was and didn't dare ask why he thought they weren't really ace but I'm guessing it was to do with having sex or a romantic partner. Wish I had had the confidence I do now to call him out on it :(

 

Oh, that and hearing from a friend that someone I'd been talking to thought they could "turn" me. I haven't  talked talked privately with them since, don't want to end up asking them about it and making things awkward.

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doggalogga   
doggalogga

I don't care what people say. Most people are uninformed on this subject and therefore what they say is as relevant as most people here talking about the joys of sex.

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Deus Ex Infinity   
Deus Ex Infinity

"It's just a phase. Get over it"

"It's just because of your meds. It's not who you really are"

 

Idiots. I always felt this way. I just didn't realize it as something normal because I didn't know that there's a word or community for it till last year.

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[noize:injekktion]   
[noize:injekktion]
8 hours ago, Shieldmaiden WinterDragon said:

*TRIGGER WARNING *

"You'll change your mind."

"You'll love it when you try it!"

"Don't worry,you'll change your mind."

"All asexuals need to be purged."

"Why don't I prove to you how it  feels?".

"Go jump off a cliff!"

 

I can come up with more but I'll leave them..... 

 

 

8 hours ago, Carson:) said:

"Real men like sex"

usually, I hear this.

 

I've been told several times that I'm not a real male if I don't like sex. just like sex was the most important thing in the world.

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arekathevampyre   
arekathevampyre

@Shieldmaiden WinterDragon that is just rude !!! omg wth 

 

@Carson apparently that is what the "real" world is - according to media . 

 

What I am sick of hearing is that everyone has to have a partner and make it seem like sex is a natural part of being in a relationship . I need no partner and no sex . omg . I am better alone (and I can survive without sex) . 

 

And plants and cells that asexually reproduce (amoeba) are always mentioned when i said I am ace

(eg . what are you ? A plant ? Or like amoeba ?) .

 

Or magic when I show the ace of spades symbol . 

(eg . your book (ace anthology) looks like a magic book) . 

 

Wtf . Really . 

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cheywix   
cheywix

"Haha, seriously? I feel sorry for you, your life sounds so boring." Thanks man, appreciate it

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Keakin   
Keakin
7 hours ago, Sinfre said:

same for me.

I don't go around saying it, I don't even like the lable asexual because I'm many things that happen to make this one person who doesn't need or want sex. But it comes up in things like, "What are you gonna do when you get married and have kids?" "I don't want any of those." Then start the questions. Or if my friends are talking about sexual anecdotes and ask me about mine, "I don't have any", "Oh well there's your problem. Go make some." "I don't want to." And again come the questions. I avoid it at all costs but if I can't divert the conversation, that's when I get these stupid remarks and questions. 

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vmdraco   
vmdraco
9 hours ago, dragon_nerd said:

"Oh I can't wait for you to grow up and get married and have kids of your own"

This was AFTER I told my Mum that I am ace. 

Ugh

I can attest to this.  I'm not asexual, or at least I don't think I am, but I hear this constantly especially from women 10+ years older than me with three kids and counting.  I don't know what it is about those who've had kids and suddenly think that people younger than 20 will change their minds about having children just because they decided to make them. 

 

Exhibit A:

Me: *smiles at tiny cousin and wiggles my fingers to play with him*

Older Female Relative: Awwww you'll make a great mom someday

Me: lmfao um no nothing is coming outta me

Older Female Relative: Yeah but your aunt used to hate kids and now she has three!  You'll change your mind when you're older ;D

 

Thanks for presuming my life will be exactly like theirs <_< 

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Keakin   
Keakin
7 hours ago, paperflames said:

when I told a friend of mine that I was asexual and that I hadn't had sex in over 15 years, he said, "I just want to crawl up your vagina right now and see what's going on."

 

at at least he didn't offer to change me. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with us. That's another misconception and highly ignorant thought. Do people seriously not hear how rapist they sound?

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[noize:injekktion]   
[noize:injekktion]
2 hours ago, cheywix said:

"Haha, seriously? I feel sorry for you, your life sounds so boring." Thanks man, appreciate it

omg this is just one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard. life is boring just because you're not interested in sex? I actually feel sorry for people who think so and who say such things to you. <_<

there are lots of things that are way more interesting than sex. and less boring. :D

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Jayce   
Jayce

"You just have to wait untill you meet THE ONE™"

 

Barf

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Keakin   
Keakin
1 minute ago, Jayce said:

"You just have to wait untill you meet THE ONE™"

 

Barf

Uuuuugh

The times I've heard that one. 

*rolls 👀 

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Phoenix the II   
Phoenix the II
2 minutes ago, Jayce said:

"You just have to wait untill you meet THE ONE™"

 

Barf

NEO-800x420.jpg

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Phoenix the II   
Phoenix the II
2 hours ago, cheywix said:

"Haha, seriously? I feel sorry for you, your life sounds so boring." Thanks man, appreciate it

You can turn this around, "Really? Sex is everything you need? You're life must be so boring that you're always searching for this."

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