RyanR Posted August 2, 2017 Share Posted August 2, 2017 Hello everyone, so I have posted on here a couple of times now. About my wife & I. She is asexual & only recently realised & I am highly sexed! We love one another very much & I know she means the world to me & vice verser. The problem is we can't find a happy medium in how we go about this & it now seems to be all we talk about & I know we both feel distant from one another. After a fairly frosty conversation yesterdah se came to an agreement that we would just be together & have our life we bithbwant but in a totally platonic way. Separate bedrooms & no intimacy, basically it would be living with your best friend & sharing your life with them! I can't help but feel incredibly sad for her & myself that we could potentially be spending our life this way. I would happily do this as I couldn't ever imagine life with out her but, at the same time I feel by doing this she is missing out on so much & she deserves so much more. We spoke about an open relationship & I said no straight away. For me personally sex with others doesn't arouse me & it's certainly not something I think of. I'd only ever want that intimacy with my wife & I don't think she understands that I only have that need for her. Please could anyone offer offer some advice on what they think could help us? Link to post Share on other sites
SlytherClaw23 Posted August 2, 2017 Share Posted August 2, 2017 If you're actively employed, check your break room posters and see if you have access to helpline through work that can make some suggestions? These programs are confidential, and you may be able to get a couple counciling sessions to help you with your Toolbox. Link to post Share on other sites
Lady Girl Posted August 2, 2017 Share Posted August 2, 2017 Why do you feel sad for her and that she's missing out? If she's indicated she doesn't want sex, than not having sex will make her feel happy and fulfilled. Not the other way round. Link to post Share on other sites
RyanR Posted August 3, 2017 Author Share Posted August 3, 2017 Because she if we went platonic misses out on the sensual side which she enjoys like the kissing & cuddling & kissing of the body other than the areas she sees as sexual. Link to post Share on other sites
Lady Girl Posted August 5, 2017 Share Posted August 5, 2017 I see. Most couples compromise to the point that both of them are comfortable and happy. Maybe you two can find a way to be more middle of the road rather than all or nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
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