fadingg Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 I was wondering if anyone could help me understand myself and help me in regards to identifying myself as asexual. I feel like people will feel as though it's a phase or not real as I'm asking for help but please hear me out. I have a boyfriend, however we've never been intimate as in never able to go through with it. We've been together for a year and a half and I always thought it was me overthinking; but I've come to realise I hate anything to do with me and sexual arousal. I hate the idea of me being turned on and I hate the idea of sexual intercourse, as well as being touched or felt in that way. However I have no problem if he wants it- I'll give it but I just won't actually be turned on. However, I do occasionally get turned on, but I can never stay turned on for long (more than a few minutes) and it's very very difficult to get me to actually be turned on. I can also 'fantasise' about sex, but I never get pleasure from it and I do often feel guilty, regret it or feel disgusted by it. I dont want to identify myself as someone I'm not so I was hoping someone could help me. Thankyou. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
hippiecat Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 Honestly, no one can tell you wether you're asexual or not. It does sound like you could be ace, but you also just might not be ready for sex? I dunno, have you guys talked about it together? Also just remember that you don't have to know everything now, you might identify as asexual for a period of your life and then it might change - no one can predict the future, no worries Quote Link to post Share on other sites
fadingg Posted July 30, 2017 Author Share Posted July 30, 2017 1 minute ago, hippiecat said: Honestly, no one can tell you wether you're asexual or not. It does sound like you could be ace, but you also just might not be ready for sex? I dunno, have you guys talked about it together? Also just remember that you don't have to know everything now, you might identify as asexual for a period of your life and then it might change - no one can predict the future, no worries hey, yeah we've talked about it quite a bit. is it okay for it to change in the future? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
hippiecat Posted July 30, 2017 Share Posted July 30, 2017 17 minutes ago, fadingg said: is it okay for it to change in the future? Absolutely! Sexuality is fluid, you can only really know what you feel in the moment (and what you've felt in the past, I guess). We're all individuals and some people identify the same way their entire lives, while some may change several times. And sometimes you might not fit into any label and that's fine too. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.