Nerea_dragón

Fetish but no attraction? (Trigger warning: mentions fetish)

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Nerea_dragón   
Nerea_dragón

Most people my age (16) seem to be sexually or romantically attracted to others (in fact, it's legal to have sex at my age in my country), but I've never really been attracted to anyone. I would assume that I'm a late bloomer (although I've gone through puberty) but I've got a fetish. Is it possible to develop sexual attraction many years after having developed a fetish, or is it likely that I'll just never develop sexual attraction? 

 

I'm not sure if it's relevant but the fetish is about the general idea of haircuts... I'm not attracted to the hairdressers or the clients, but just the idea of haircuts. It's strange though, because I've had this fetish from an unusually young age (about 10) as I remember that I tried to cut my own fringe then and got very aroused in the process... and yet 6 years later I still don't feel sexual attraction or a desire to be intimate with anybody or even to masturbate.

 

Does this imply that I probably won't develop sexual attraction?

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doggalogga   
doggalogga

I have had a fetish for most of my life. It went off in a big way when I first accessed the old internet back in 1997 and found a big world out there. It existed before then.

People even pointed out that I had an obsession with that 'aspect' when I was in Primary School, which I denied. However, in hindsight, they were right.

 

I have never participated in my fetish, but it's still there. I just access websites here and there.

 

However, I still experience no sexual attraction.

 

However, my experience is not yours.

 

That may change for you. Nobody here can give you a definitive answer. You'll know how to answer that for yourself in due course. :)

 

The fetish is actually independent to sexual attraction. Many people with fetishes are married and engage in regular intercourse. The fetish may be incorporated in their sexual fantasies and lovemaking.

 

But your circumstances imply nothing. if it's to be, then it'll happen.

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siva_k   
siva_k

I am 22 years old and i've also had a hair fetish right from my teens. I'm in a relationship now and i get attracted to a lot of people but it's always romantic. But my fetish makes me masturbate and that's the closest it gets to anything sexual for me.

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Yato   
Yato

I have a lot of fetishes, but it never caused me to experiance sexual attraction no matter how much I bent my imagination.

 

Can kinks help you get aroused? Yes. Since I'm a sex positive asexual, I provide the act for my Significant other. Do I enjoy it? No, im rather repulsed by it. So I tend to close my eyes and imagine my fetish the best I can to make it better. I had hoped one day this will make me like sex, but it never did.

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siva_k   
siva_k
18 hours ago, Yato God of Tofu said:

I have a lot of fetishes, but it never caused me to experiance sexual attraction no matter how much I bent my imagination.

 

Can kinks help you get aroused? Yes. Since I'm a sex positive asexual, I provide the act for my Significant other. Do I enjoy it? No, im rather repulsed by it. So I tend to close my eyes and imagine my fetish the best I can to make it better. I had hoped one day this will make me like sex, but it never did.

But you still get aroused by female sexual organs even though you don't like sex?

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Yato   
Yato
2 hours ago, siva_k said:

But you still get aroused by female sexual organs even though you don't like sex?

No, genitals are not my thing. My fetishes are non-sexual.

 

Arousal and attraction are different things. 

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Janus DarkFox   
Janus DarkFox

The future could bring many new experiences, I've got a few fetishes that are best experienced on my own.

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EggplantWitch   
EggplantWitch

I've had a fetish since I was about 15 or 16 and I'm 20 now, but I'm still asexual as all hell. The idea of ever participating in it either alone or with someone else, or witnessing it in real life, utterly mortifies me as I'm sex-repulsed as all hell. I'm content just reading about it, maybe watching videos if they don't have any nudity in them, and that's it.

 

It is possible you'll develop sexual attraction, fetishes or not. It's also possible you'll always be asexual. What matters most is whether the label of 'asexual' helps you now.

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