Can asexuality be caused by birth complications?

[Galactic Turtle]

Hellos humans.

 

When I was born I came out with the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck so I basically came out blue and the doctor was slow to react to it. My parents had asked at the time if I had been damaged but the doctor at the time said I'd be fine. I've known about this my whole life and it has always been the punchline for jokes whenever I'd do or act or think something strange. Because of this my mom actually stumbled upon the term asexuality years before I did but because she didn't see much legitimacy in it as a concept and didn't want me to be influenced by fringe ideas never told me until I brought it up with her a year or so ago.

 

Through other conversations on AVEN people seem to think I'm somewhere on the autism spectrum. I'd done a little bit of research especially as it relates to women with the condition but not too much when articles seemed to describe me quite well. Those types of things are viewed very negatively in my family so I didn't want to bring up a reason for me to be seen as lower than anyone else. There are other people in my extended family who seem to have had mental illnesses or minority sexual preferences who have been purposefully kept away from me or distanced themselves on their own. The only one still around is one of my aunts and she's always treated very dismissively because of the trouble her mental retardation has caused to the extent that my other aunt was always very vocal that if her children had been born the same way she would've sent them away immediately because of how hard it was.

 

So because of this I was surprised when my mom brought up it up on her own. Both of my parents have looked into it more. I had hinted at it once, very passively, but they think it's the answer to everything because there's no way my feelings about sex or other mannerisms could be considered naturally occurring. It's all because I came out blue and had a bad doctor and that maybe things would've been different if they'd been more strict or hadn't viewed things like therapy negatively to the extent that they never sent me. Anywho they say that even if I'm stuck this way I should just be aware that all of this has a root cause and be conscious of it when interacting with other people.

 

I was wondering if many other people who consider themselves to be asexual had something abnormal happen during the birthing process and if so does this mean that maybe asexuality isn't naturally occurring and rather a consequence of something else?

 

Thanks...

[Grumpy Alien]

Nope

[Galactic Turtle]

11 minutes ago, Graceful said:

Nope

So in my case then I'm not asexual, I just had birth complications with lasting effects?

[roland.o]

"Nope" was an answer to your topic title - No, it cannot be caused by birth complications, is what @Graceful wants to express.

 

1 hour ago, Galactic Turtle said:

maybe asexuality isn't naturally occurring

It is naturally occurring. I'm not going as far as ruling out that your birth complications had something to do with it in your special case. But please do not suggest that everyone who is asexual is damaged in any way. They're not. And even you... does it matter why you are asexual, if that's what you identify as? Does it matter whether it's a special combination of chromosomes, or a special way in which the synapses in your brain connected while you were in your mother's womb, or a special way in which they re-connected while you were born? One thing you can rule out is the absence of therapy. Sexual orientation is not a matter of education, training, or brainwashing.

 

You are what you are. Make the best of it. Thinking about why you might be what you are isn't going to help.

[a minor triad]

Epigentics. Environment and gene expression. They're now saying that these two things interact with each other, so it's certainly a possibility, but it would be incredibly hard to say. And if your asexuality was influeneced by something like that, I don't think it makes your identity invalid. 

[Galactic Turtle]

It's more like I just don't want to spread false information to others or myself. Like it could be harmful thinking I am asexual, if asexuality actually exists, if in reality I just have a near inconsequential form of brain damage, essentially. 

[a minor triad]

Ok, but even if that was the cause of your asexuality, it is still asexuality. Just because you can find a cause to something doesn't make it invalid. I know I'm just repeating myself, but it's true. Yes, there probably isn't a traceable cause for everyone, but that doesn't mean it's impossible. Besides. I think we are a long way off from understanding the causes of some diseases and disorders, so I doubt we will be finding any solid causes for sexual orientations. In general, I think there is a dangerous mindset in our society that if a sexual orientation is affected by a person's environment, it is not valid. We wouldn't say that for other things, like personality traits. 

 

If you truly believe you are asexual or think you are, then you are not spreading false information. 

[Scottthespy]

It would be less harmful to 'think' you are asexual due to a lack of sexual desire than to imply to everyone with a lack of sexual desire that they are damaged or sick in some way. What harm comes from not wanting sex and thus not having sex? None. What harm comes from thinking there's something intrinsically wrong with you? From the introductory posts on Aven, I'd say a LOT of harm. 

[Yatogami]

As someone who wasn't born Asexual either, I can understand how you feel @Galactic Turtle. 

 

I don't however, feel that lack of oxygen could create asexuality, at least as currently studied by science.  But I also would not say that it was impossible. Since lack of oxygen to the brain/drugs and alcohol can create several problems in infants and their minds as they get older.

 

I have a morbid suspicion that my mom smoked, did drugs, and drank when she had my siblings and I. My mother miscarried twice, before my sister was born. My sister suffers from heart defects, that she passed on to her child. One of my brothers has autism, and is mentally slow. My mother has the IQ of a 7 year old child, and zero impulse control. She smoke, and drank before she had us. So I can't imagine her not doing it, when she was pregnant. Since she could not stop her addictions for as long as I had known her, no matter how much it tore our family apart. 

 

My Asexuality was caused by neglect of contact/love from my parents. I was pretty much abandoned to my own devices and treated like a pet very coldly. This resulted in me being schizoid, which lists Asexuality as one of its symptoms. 

[Guest]

7 hours ago, Galactic Turtle said:

It's more like I just don't want to spread false information to others or myself. Like it could be harmful thinking I am asexual, if asexuality actually exists, if in reality I just have a near inconsequential form of brain damage, essentially. 

I think it's okay to identify with asexuality even if you suspect it might have been caused by something, I don't think it would be spreading false information, just do whatever is most comfortable for you 

[Galactic Turtle]

I don't know. It might make the rest of the community look less legitimate if there are aces who also have an entire other list of complications. But I still feel the same way as they do. I'm not really sure what my mom wanted me to do with this information besides pray I get better... I guess...

[Guest]

51 minutes ago, Galactic Turtle said:

I don't know. It might make the rest of the community look less legitimate if there are aces who also have an entire other list of complications. But I still feel the same way as they do. I'm not really sure what my mom wanted me to do with this information besides pray I get better... I guess...

There are all kinds of people in the asexuality community, it doesn't make asexuality look less legitimate

Look at the intersectionality section of this site: http://www.asexuality.org/en/forum/127-intersectionality/

[BionicPi]

1 hour ago, Galactic Turtle said:

I don't know. It might make the rest of the community look less legitimate if there are aces who also have an entire other list of complications.

I may have suffered from some form of childhood traumatic experience. Such an experience may have contributed to any of my several learning disorders. Does that make me not ADHD? No, and I suspect most people would consider it absurd if I said so. 

The same event may have contributed to my asexuality/aromanticism/asensuality. So what? I still meet these definitions. I still am these things. If I know the cause, that doesn't eliminate the result.

[TheAP]

Well, my mom had to have a C-section because of breech. Not sure if that counts. And I don't really see it as relating to my asexuality.

[Philip027]

As far as I was told, there was just the C-section.  Which is commonplace enough, and if anything seems like it would be more stressful to the parent than the child.

 

In all likelihood, this is just your parents attempting to scapegoat for you again.

[doggalogga]

There is no direct reason why people are asexual.

There is no direct reason why people are heterosexual

There is no direct reason why people are homosexual

There is no direct reason why people are bi-sexual

(apologies if I've missed any other orientation)

 

I know for a fact that my Mum was hardly interested in sex, with my Dad referring to her as a, 'block of ice' many times of the years.

 

However, I still don't link that with who I've become in any way. I'm the way I am because of genetics, and experience, as well as things sometimes are just because. To look into reasons regarding the 'cause' of your sexuality is pointless because you'll never find a definite answer, which will only frustrate you more.

 

Celebrate who you are, and pursue whatever makes you happy.

[iff]

it would be a difficult area, could there be a higher rate of asexuals having had complications at birth than the general population as a whole.

 

then the next question would be, does correlation mean causation.

 

it could be a factor or could be increasing likelihood. unfortunately, it is hard to say either way. and i'm not sure of any research on the subject

[IntellectualAsexual]

I am not entirely asexual and I had some complications at birth, too, oxygen deprivation. 

[Luftschlosseule]

On 16.7.2017 at 3:54 PM, Galactic Turtle said:

I've known about this my whole life and it has always been the punchline for jokes whenever I'd do or act or think something strange.

That's awful. Really, really, awful. I am sorry for you.

My mother had a thing called HELLP syndrom in which the amniotic fluid turns poisonous and for a time it looked as if we both were not going to make it. I was born weeks earlier than I should have and spend a long time in intensive care. So, every year on my birthday my mother cracks down and tells me that so many years ago we both almost died - and I know how that makes me feel. I have nothing to do with it, it was not my fault, and it's nothing I can change or that should be important after all this time, but it's brought up nevertheless. I understand that she may have a real problem with that, but making it my problem, too, is not going to help her.
But at least I have to stand this only once a year. And it was never the punchline.

 

I don't know if there is any correlation, I just doubt it, but nevertheless - you should not have to suffer through this.
Sorry, I am upset at the people around you.

[Janus the Fox]

I needed an emergency C-Section being in breach birth and suffocating in the womb, as I'm told I was born a dark blue colour.  I Was also born with several congenital birth defects affecting the physical genitalia, including that of being born a tourettes-autistic child with a history of being developmentally sexually behind physically and psychologically, having some traumatic abuse of some kind and having a history of mental illness. 

 

None of that causes asexuality, none of that causes my gender differences and non of that can be attributed to my romantic interest with men.  It's just what sexuality is.