Bellazy99 Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 Hello my name is Bella and I'm so lost and confused right now. I don't know who to talk to and so I'm here hoping someone will take the time to help. I pretty much have always been attracted to guys and have had a pretty 'normal' experience with crushes and sexuality. For a while I never had a boyfriend when other girls were getting boyfriends (in middle school and freshman and sophomore year) because I was shy and I thought maybe there was something wrong with me. I had gotten a lot of opportunities with guys and I always turned them down for whatever reason (not cute enough, not nice enough, not feeling it, etc) and I didn't think much of it. i got a boyfriend in junior year and I was soooo happy. I had wanted this guy for a while and now he was mine! I couldn't stop fantasizing about him. We went to a bonfire on our first night together and at the end we made out and I enjoyed it. Then we had started dating for a week and at the weekend we decided to go on a movie date. I'm not sure why but SUDDENLY the attracted just like...disappeared. I had no desire to be with him and I definitely did not want to kiss him. He tried at the end but I said I wasn't feeling well and dogded him. I broke up with him some time later and now even the thought of being with him makes me want to puke. I know that sounds harsh but it is true! Guys that look similar to him turn me off. I thought around then that maybe there was something wrong with me but I tried to ignore it. I considered that I might be gay for a little but after thinking about it I decided I'm definitely not into girls that way. So cut forward a year and here I am. I meet a guy, get attracted to him and want him soooo bad. Bonus points if he doesn't want me back or if he strings me on. Then I go out with me and all it takes is one regular day with regular conversation and bam! I'm not longer attracted??? What is happening to me? Am I just finding the wrong guys? Because it feels like every guy I get to know I just am no longer attracted to and it's so horrible. I feel so crazy and confused and angry. I just to have a relationship and be happy but I have this feeling like I can't settle for any of these guys. I just want more more, something else. If anyone experiences something similar please help. It would be sooo much appreciated! -bella Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TheAP Posted July 9, 2017 Share Posted July 9, 2017 There is a term called "fraysexual", which means that you lose attraction for someone after getting to know them. That sounds like it might fit you. 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mayapple Posted July 19, 2017 Share Posted July 19, 2017 Hi! Like the user above me said, a good word to describe your feeling would be fraysexual. It's like the opposite of demisexual, so you start out being attracted but lose the attraction once you get to know the person. Your feelings may be scary or confusing, but hang in there. It takes time to figure yourself out, so don't worry! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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