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Are people romantically/sexually uninterested in you ?


Skyl

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I think there's been a small amount of mild interest, but I ignored them when I could. If anyone has any kind of sexual or romantic interest in me I've probably scared them away with my ace comments. Even before I knew I was ace, I was always making very ace comments and never tried to fit in. :lol:

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There are two cases from high school where someone showed interest in me.  I basically ignored it until they went away.  And set up a fake girlfriend who went to a different school to discourage other people from ever approaching me if they were interested.

 

Nowadays, I don't need to do that, I have done some research and learned the body language to project the appearance of disinterest and unsexy.  Sorta figured out a way to fake resting bitch face.

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Re aura, a friend told me she could tell I "wasn't one of those horny straight boys" from 3rd grade... So maybe?

 

I don't know if anyone has ever shown interest, I usually am somewhat oblivious to sexual/romantic things.

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As far as I can tell no one has ever been interested in me.

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Possibly, because people tell me I look okay, but despite that, nobody actually shows true interest...

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I had a friend in high school who knew I was asexual but still told me she wanted to have sex with me. I was super flattered but I declined the offer, of course.

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I'm so glad it's not just me who has wondered about this! "Aura" seems a poor term for a it, and I'm always sceptical of these things, but for whatever reason, no one has ever shown any 'interest' in me. Literally no one. I've never really been able to understand why. I don't think I'm particularly unattractive, but maybe I am and I just can't see it because vanity or something. It makes me question everything about myself tbh: am I ugly?, do I have a really unpleasant personality?, am I just boring?

 

It made me wonder if people could somehow sense my asexuality. Like maybe I give off some kind of asexual vibe I'm not aware of?? Friends are always telling me how lucky I am not to have guys hitting on me all the time, but it has started to make me feel a bit down. I really want to date someone, but I don't see how I can if no one is ever attracted to me.

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Very occasionally I experience mild interest, but for the most part I fly under the radar. I'm fairly certain I radiate waves of Asexiness. XD

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Guest Deus Ex Infinity
On 11.7.2017 at 6:19 AM, Correner said:

As far as I can tell no one has ever been interested in me.

Quote

Very occasionally I experience mild interest, but for the most part I fly under the radar.

Agreed. At least I wasn't aware of it.

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999papercranes

It helps that I'm mostly unnattractive, but I do also think I give off that *vibe.* Everyone knows I don't "do" romance. Most of the guys my age are intimidated by me anyway, seeing as how I'm still in high school with a bunch of rednecks. I think my willingness to debate them politically is probably a turn-off. I'm definitely not complaining. 

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I do not think there is anything like an "aura" or such. it is just how you move, speak and such. We are all sending out nonverbal information all the time without thinking about it.

That said, I have luckily never had someone being sexually interested in me, and my girlfriend is the only one who ever felt romantically attracted to me AFAIK.

Probably due to my appearance - to this day I look extremely young (compared to my true age), would probably only be attractive to pedophiles and dress very modest and plain.

In fact I once overheard someone asking a friend of mine who that cute and well behaved child is - she meant me. Somehow I do not fit the pattern and trigger the response "possible mating partner" in people.

I am not unhappy about that :-)

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  • 3 weeks later...

I'm completely ignored by other people. No one makes eye contact or says hi. I've never been hit on or flirted with. I've been told I have closed off body language and that makes me unapproachable. Social anxiety will do that.

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I think I give off uninterested vibes quite a lot :D. If someone shows even the tiniest bit of romantic or sexual interest in me, I become the most boring, unapproachable person until I feel comfortable again.

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People are initially interested in me, but my body language is so closed and shy they normally give up after a couple of encounters - the only person that hasn't so far I was friends with for years before - we never went there for reasons, but still.

 

I'm currently dating guy who knows I'm ace (still working out if I'm aro myself here) and despite that and my body language is still sexually interested in me - but only because I was upfront with him verbally, otherwise he basically told me my non-reactive aura would have scared him off.

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I've actually had a lot of people be interested and get flirted with on a regular basis, apparently I don't give off an "asexual vibe" :P

I also think people must mistake my friendliness for flirting, because I am definitely not much of a flirt as far as I know!  

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There was two women ever that were interested in me and both times I didn't know how to respond ... and didn't.  Other than that, people are pretty uninterested in me which is fine.

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I don't think so. I live in a very small town which has only one junior high school and a high school. It means people around my age (who also went to the high school in my home town) know me from junior high school and around that time I acted really weird. 

 

I think the image I gave of myself has evicted everyone who could have gotten interested in me a long time ago. But yeah, my school is super small and actually I am really scared of university because there will be definitely more people. 

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Yes.

 

I can count the people who have ever complimented me on one hand. The only person who was sexually interested in me (the thought alone makes me wanna puke) was a psychopath, go figure.

 

I have come to the conclusion I am simply invisible.

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SallyBlackwater

I think I give off asexual vibes xD I don't think anyone has ever flirted with me, unless you call honking and catcalling "flirting" D: I guess that the only people who probably were interested in me were two guys online, and even then I felt there was something off and a bit creepy in the way they interacted with me so I stopped replying after a while....

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Karacoreable

People don't tend to try and hug me, so I possibly give off some sort of vibe like that. I get a bit cross if I think someone is showing an interest of the type I won't return. Makes me grumpy.

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The problem for me is that I can't tell if people like or don't like me, which is why I don't feel comfortable around (most) straight men. I keep having feelings that tell me that someone likes me but I'm not sure if they're accurate.

 

I sure wish there was an automatic aura of "please don't." (Maybe I just haven't found it yet!)  I try to project a message of "not interested" as much as possible when around people that seem to express interest.

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NerotheReaper

Yeah there have been and currently yes. 

 

With attraction there are several factors, one is is body language and confidence. If your body language is relaxed and welcoming, people will probably want to talk to you or find you more appealing. Also confidence is pretty useful for finding someone, if you present yourself as happy and confident in your own skin you can give off this 'vibe' let's say and people are drawn to that. 

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I haven't been approached by many people but according to my bf it's not that people don't hit on me or something, but rather I reply in such a way that shuts them down without even realizing it's what I'm doing.  By contrast, my sis is even less interested in people but is nice to them and gets asked out a lot more often.  

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people are apparently intimidated by me because I look dead 24/7.

I wanna have friends though. :,<

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I have no problem finding someone sexually who is interested in me. I'd much rather find someone romantically interested (when I'm ready to anyway).

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fatal flower-boy

I don't think you would know?

Like if no one has ever been romantically or sexually attracted to you, what if they are and they just aren't showing it? o-o Like, I know I've been into some people, but never showed a sign of it. I don't know about romantic/sexual auras though... 

No one has expressed interest in me, but I don't know if they did like me, you know?

 

Now when it comes to positive and negative auras, I believe in those...

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Uninterested? No, definitely not. I get a lot of interest, for what it's worth.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Guys are interested in me fairly easily, sexually and otherwise. The sexual-only advances get shut down very quickly. Women don't tend to be, and when they are, it's usually too sexual for me (more so than the guys, even). I used to think I was very obvious with showing people I'm interested in them, but nowadays I wonder if that is the case, or whether I'm actually giving off stand-offish vibes and 'hard to get close to' vibes to the people around me, and whether that's what's limiting me.

 

Not that that's untrue - I am pretty hard to get close to. But it doesn't mean I don't want to.

 

Though, I have been told I don't get hit on in nightclubs anywhere near as much as people would expect. So there's definitely some anti-something vibe coming off me :P

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lilgroundhog

I don't know if guys just aren't interested or if I shut them down without realizing it.  Anyone who knows me much at all know I'm "prickly" when it comes to being in a romantic relationship, and I'm not shy about saying I don't want that kind of relationship.  I have had a few times I recognized it, but those were normally where it had crossed into from interested into creepy.

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