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Hello from a confused mom


Moon_mommy

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Hi everyone that reads this. Im not sure where I fit in, in life I guess. I do have 2 daughters and im married. But I've never really been sexually attracted to my husband or anyone else. I've always just thought it was something you did when you loved someone. Sometimes I enjoy it but most of the time I cant wait until its over. And ill say and do whatever to make it go by as fast as I can. I do masturbate when im stressed out or cant sleep. The endorphins help relax me. I just thought something was wrong with me. If anyone has any insight please share. Thanks

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Lord Jade Cross

Welcome Moon_mommy

 

Causes for disinterest in sex and attraction can vary. You could be ace; many people get into sexual relationships or have sex out of the idea that just have to do it, it will come as a result of love, will feel good with practice, etc. Since we are constantly bombarded with the idea, it isnt unusual that many people dont question it.

 

The reason could be biological, such as a low libido. People who are or have been on medications such as antidepressants have been known to lose libido.

 

It could be health related. Contrary to what we may believe, we can quite easily fall into a life-long routine that leaves us exhausted but we justify it by any means and even turn a blind eye to its effects.

 

There are some FAQ threads here where you can check to help you get started on finding out what the cause can be.

 

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All the little Lights

Hello and welcome to Aven!

Black-forest-cake-1-Kg-A.jpg?itok=IB1Ebt

 

Nothing is wrong with you, you are fantastic the way you are!

I don't really have any insight for you I'm afraid...

But keep in mind that every feeling you have is valid, and not inherently bad!

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7 minutes ago, All the little Lights said:

Hello and welcome to Aven!

Black-forest-cake-1-Kg-A.jpg?itok=IB1Ebt

 

Nothing is wrong with you, you are fantastic the way you are!

I don't really have any insight for you I'm afraid...

But keep in mind that every feeling you have is valid, and not inherently bad!

Thank you. And thank you foe the cake 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂 🎂

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fall_all_year

Moon_mommy - I feel like could have written that post myself.  I especially relate to the part about just wanting it to be over any time I engage with my husband.  I don't think there is anything wrong with you.  Wikipedia has great information about asexuality.  Asexuals are a small percentage of the population but that doesn't mean it's wrong or not real.  I hope that educating yourself on the subject of asexuality will give you some comfort.

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3 hours ago, All the little Lights said:

Hello and welcome to Aven!

Black-forest-cake-1-Kg-A.jpg?itok=IB1Ebt

 

Nothing is wrong with you, you are fantastic the way you are!

I don't really have any insight for you I'm afraid...

But keep in mind that every feeling you have is valid, and not inherently bad!

Um that is an excellent photo of cake. I mean did you bake it homemade and then get a professional photographer to take it just for this moment. If so THAT IS AWESOME! Oh and welcome Moon_Mommy!

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Hello there, and welcome to AVEN! As you can see, others here have similar feelings as you.  :cake:

As part of my welcome to you, I'd like to point out some important threads that might be helpful in your first few days here. :) The Terms of Service is here. We recommend you read it over, and if you have any questions please don't hesitate to send either myself or any other administrator or moderator (the "admod" team, as we're called) a message.  Also, there's a handy forum called Site Info, which has some useful information including a thread outlining who moderates which forum. If you ever need something done in or have questions about a specific forum, please message the mod of that forum. And if you have problems with the site in general, or any single member, please message any admod. 

The following are also nifty links to take a look at:  Welcome Lounge Mini Manual | Welcoming 101 | Quick Guide to the Forums | Asexuality FAQ's

 Again, welcome to AVEN and I hope your stay is everything you hoped!

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All the little Lights
17 hours ago, GLRDT said:

Um that is an excellent photo of cake. I mean did you bake it homemade and then get a professional photographer to take it just for this moment. If so THAT IS AWESOME! Oh and welcome Moon_Mommy!

No I just found it on the internet :-D I googled "cake".

 

Oh, and for the newbies here: This is how a thread often gets derailed on Aven:D

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