3ryry3 Posted June 25, 2017 Share Posted June 25, 2017 I know the defintion of asexual is a lack of sexual attraction but I've had conversations with people who don't have sexual attraction but still crave sex and want people and don't identify as asexual. But I've also talked to people who don't have sexual attraction and want to have sex but consider themselves asexual. So it's really confusing to me on how you know for sure you are. -for me I've never experienced sexual attraction to anymore (I'm nearing 20) -I masturbate to help me sleep -I've had sex because I thought it was the thing to do, but I never really got in the mood to do it. I like things sure but my want for sex dies out as soon as I'm actually in the moment So I'm just confused how you know I guess. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kelpie Posted June 25, 2017 Share Posted June 25, 2017 What people want to identify as is always some kind of personal choice. If you don't experience sexual attraction but often pursue sex you might still want to consider yourself heterosexual because that's easier to explain. If you don't experience sexual attraction AND don't want sex I'd say you're pretty ace. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
3ryry3 Posted June 25, 2017 Author Share Posted June 25, 2017 I'm not heterosexual. And I don't pursue sex all of my sexual activity were spontaneous and like I said as soon as I get into it it's not fun anymore. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Subliminal Fantasies Posted June 25, 2017 Share Posted June 25, 2017 Asexuality is on a spectrum like anything else. You don't have to fit every single one of the possible aspects of asexuality to be asexual. For me, I feel attraction and arousal but I still don't want to have sex. Things turn me on and they make me want to hug or kiss someone but not have sex with them. Also things change. you may feel like this today, it may change later. You just have to find the identification that feels right to you, and you're not stuck with it! It's your life and your identity, you can change it any time you want. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
3ryry3 Posted June 26, 2017 Author Share Posted June 26, 2017 Thank you subliminal (: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Éadweard Posted June 26, 2017 Share Posted June 26, 2017 I'm not sexually attracted to anyone. That's how I know. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
GRexCarolinii Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 short answer: labels are arbitrary, people can choose to use them or not if you think the label fits you, and helps somehow (finding identity, community, just having something to say to explain?) Then go for it! In a wider sense - Asexuality is generally just the lack of sexual attraction to another person. you can be asexual, have sex, masturbate, or whatever else as long as you don't feel that sexual attraction to another person Equally... sexuality is fluid and can change, so some days you might feel asexual, others not. It's up to you really what label helps, if any. As for me? I still don;t really know. I tend to use the wider term of "Gray-A", and have asked sexual and demisexual friends many a time what this mythical sexual attraction even is I don;t think I feel it but desire the emotional experience that can come with it only with the right person. So in a very small nutshell: I'm asexual because I don't feel the sexual attraction hope that helps 5 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
LadyRiddle Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 I think I knew I was asexual when during sex I was thinking: This is what all the fuss is about? and I want cake. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rhaenys Posted June 27, 2017 Share Posted June 27, 2017 I birthed a clone of myself from my elbow. Seriously now I know I'm asexual because I don't need sex to connect and show my love to another person. I have no need to seek sex with a partner because I see it as a complete waste of time and I could be doing actual entertaining things. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jose Cruz Posted June 28, 2017 Share Posted June 28, 2017 I know I am asexual because I do not get an erection if I don't do physical stimulation (i.e. masturbation). That is, any type of visual stimulation of any kind leaves me cold. In other words, I don't react to any type of porn or live women or men. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DemiGeekGoddess Posted June 28, 2017 Share Posted June 28, 2017 You know its like a natural instinct. You know that feeling when you may see something displeasing, someone unattractive, or non amusing. Just picture that you may have a tendency to feel at least one of those feelings with everyone that you encounter. With me it is mostly the un amused feeling. I think it's normal. Being asexual is a feeling or a state of being and when you feel it you just know. You may not exactly know the terms for it right away when you notice that you are different ....but when you feel it....you just know. I know that I am asexual because it's just like any other instinctual sexual identity except for the fact that the feelings that other sexual orientations feel are sometimes just obsolete in this genre. That's it. It's just that simple. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
3ryry3 Posted June 28, 2017 Author Share Posted June 28, 2017 thank you everyone this has helped a lot 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Willgracefan Posted June 29, 2017 Share Posted June 29, 2017 I think I always knew but could never admit it to myself. I knew I didn't care enough to seek out a romantic or sexual partner. I was always just ok being "alone" I had my "a-ha moment" when watching a YouTube video about how a blogger knew they were asexual. It took their explanation of their feeling for my light bulb to go off. Yep, that's me! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Yep, me Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Asexual means: no sexual attraction(it can be for a different reason like reproducing). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
doggalogga Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Because nothing else makes sense to me. I have no desire for sex. It's just what makes the most sense to me and brings me peace. If I try to think otherwise, I confuse myself and feel like shit. How I define myself though applies to nobody else, and is for nobody else to judge. The same rule applies for you, and everybody else. 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.