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HELP I'M A CONFUSED YOUNG ACE


babybluesnowpants

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babybluesnowpants

I'm questioning my romantic attraction and this is certainly not helping. Oh dear.

 

School just finished today, and I asked a friend that I made in the beginning of the year whether she's attracted to me (it became really obvious at one point, and she was really touchy-feely and very jealous of my best friend). She said possibly and I still haven't confirmed that I definitely don't like her THAT WAY. I have no clue how to do this, or how to deal with letting her down. Her crush made me (and still makes me) very uncomfortable because she's a VERY proud lesbian, and I'm a closeted trans guy. You see my dilemma. So, I don't know how to let her down gently and also have her stop being so jealous of my best friend (who is also queer). A bit of help?

 

Yes, i know this sounds like a cliche teenage problem, AND IT IS!

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MakeupJunkie4

Here's an adult cliche for ya: Be honest. :P Lol. I understand how it is, I've been a non-cis teen once myself. But really, honesty IS the best policy. You can tell her how you feel without being mean, I'm sure you know that already. But sharing your place and your orientation with her would probably be your best bet. Definitely let her know how much you value your friendship with her though....that helps soften the blow. HTH. :)

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TheCatBehind

What Jenna said is damn good advice and I want to solidify that by showing you what happened this year in my school!

 

There's this openly gay guy in my class and a senior girl has had a strong crush on him since basically last year, actually. And he has known that for a long time, but he decided to do nothing about it! The girl and him have been really close and I have some friends from her year that can confirm that she's not been taking it well in the slightest. Again, he knows that, but still decided to do nothing.

The girl is gonna be leaving school this year and they won't see each other much for a year, the guy just so happens to have decided on the same uni as she did... I don't know what the girl is planning, but the guy told me he will not do anything about her crush on him, because she knows he's gay. That was the reasoning. Problems is that if people have a crush on someone they don't reason straight, I know that myself, and even if your crush they are not interested you are NOT going to stop having feelings immediately. But it is a good start. I managed to get over my (first) crush after only 5 months so it is an arduous process, but if I wasn't rejected I prolly would still be miserable.

 

So be honest. For yourself and the person crushing on you. In these matters being honest is the best thing you can do.

 

Hope this helps.

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