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Multiple sexual orientations


LandonH

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Hello, I came across a YouTube video explaining the aromantic spectrum and I identify as pansexual and panromantic.I only have asethetic, sensual, and platonic attraction forwards everyone. But sometimes (rarely) I have romantic attraction or the urge to date someone. Overall, I use pansexual as an umbrella term and I only feel sexual attraction once a bond is formed. I've realized that I fit within the Quoiromantic and Areoflexible spectrum . I'm so confused, would this make me less of a pansexual/ panromantic, and also I don't like using so much labeles it makes me feel too  obsessed . Can anyone give me any advice? Or resources? 

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Scottthespy

As much as I dislike labels in general, the idea of only being sexually attracted after a bond is formed has been given the label "demisexuality". If you seem to have no physical prerequisites for this attraction, and it can be for any one of any group, so long as you get to know them and form a bond, you could probably go with 'demipansexual'. Or, since you don't like labels either, you could go with "I'm LandonH, who is attracted to people only after forming a bond with them, and has yet to see any physical trends in the people I wind up attracted to.". A definition of an aspect of your self, rather than a pigeonhole label.

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a minor triad

This is one of the difficulties that come about when people start incorporating frequency of sexual/romantic attraction in sexual orientations. Traditional sexual orientations do not give information about the frequency or the circumstances with which people experience sexual attraction; they state who this attraction is directed towards. (Example: heterosexual = attraction to a person of the opposite sex/gender) I'm not saying it's a bad thing that the asexual community introduced frequency and circumstances of attraction (e.g., demi and grey identities), I'm just pointing out that this new system comes with its flaws.

 

Considering this, I do not think it would be contradictory or odd for you to put a demi- prefix in front of your orientations. As Scottthespy stated, demisexual/romantic means that an emotional bond is needed for attraction to take place, however the demi- identity does not specify who that attraction is directed towards. Basically, what I'm saying is, that you could call yourself "Demi-panromantic/sexual" and that would count as one orientation. Based off of what you described here, I would probably label myself as that. I don't know a lot about the Quoiromantic and Areoflexible identities, however, so I can't help you there.

 

Also, welcome to AVEN! :cake:

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